sfits Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 going out with my ex 4 and a half years im 30 shes 23 and we moved to the city 8 months ago she was with me for the 5 months and decided to break up so we are 3 months broke up she said she wished we didnt move in together so soon and moved to the city so soon,i met her for lunch las week and she seemed very happy as she wanted to be friends when we said her goodbyes i was heartbroken, she emailed me this the the next day I loved our time together and it will always be so special to me. Please please don't feel guilty as I want us to remember the great times we had together and all the happiness we shared. And I hope in time you can move on as you deserve to be happy more than anything!! I loved seeing you and really hope we can remain friends as you still mean so much to me. There are times when I miss you also and I miss your family too.. and I want you to know that you are a wonderful person and you will always hold a place in my heart as we were together for so long. I really hope you can be happy and hope you do so well with all your future plans! I am happy for you and proud of you for all you have achieved so far!! So be happy and enjoy life and look to the future with no regret, and remember you are a good person and I will always think of you with a smile on my face. does the my ex really mean this that there is no hope getting back together is it final?? or do dumpers just say this cause the breakup is at early stages? and maybe in the future we may get back together ,im moving on anyway. Link to comment
DN Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Sorry - but it looks final to me. I think you should do what she suggests and move on. Link to comment
Clabs Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I agree with DN - it does look pretty final. As much as it hurts, at least she has been up front with you and not strung you along. Take care mate. Mark Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Ah... yeah... Sorry bud. She's basically saying it's over and she ain't coming back. Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Agree with the others and I also wouldn't try to be friends with her...at least not now. Link to comment
sfits Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 no i wont be friends with her now..Ah..well her loss..im just going to have to pick myself up and move on for my own sake. Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 no i wont be friends with her now..Ah..well her loss..im just going to have to pick myself up and move on for my own sake. Yeah it blows... but you've got the right attitude. Stay strong and move on. Nothing says "your loss" like a big smile and your head held high. Link to comment
sfits Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 thanks everyone it helps alot Link to comment
Casanova4life Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 all women say crap like that when they brake up . its call releasing the guilt. i put them to the test right away and move on faster than they think. get a new girl attractive of course and be happy again. then you start catching up with her and little by little letting them now about your new exciting happy new life with your new women. if you are smart you will smell the stench coming from her. Link to comment
agtc Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 all women say crap like that when they brake up . its call releasing the guilt. i put them to the test right away and move on faster than they think. get a new girl attractive of course and be happy again. then you start catching up with her and little by little letting them now about your new exciting happy new life with your new women. if you are smart you will smell the stench coming from her. LOL so true!!! Does it apply to male dumpers too even when you are under strict NC? Link to comment
JenniferSNJ Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I broke up with my ex of 4 years last year. I never once regretted it. When I am done, I am done. Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 It depends. That letter does look final, but I have a feeling you may have a chance. Go NC, not for her but for yourself. Be happy. Get fit. Get a makeover done, hang with your loved ones. Date around... once she'll hear that you're out having a great time, she will start to wonder. Trust me. Link to comment
sfits Posted May 22, 2009 Author Share Posted May 22, 2009 maybe so..since we broke up we have been in contact everyweek well i have anyway by phone text.so ill now go to NC and get on with my life Link to comment
sfits Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 Update! Ex texted me today she said, Hi how are you how? what should i text back,i dont want to be friends and i dont want to keep in contact. Link to comment
Applewhite Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Well then obviously you shouldn't reply right! Be strong! I also know it works. Just don't reply. Who is she to deserve YOUR reply! Hah! Link to comment
bex Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Well then obviously you shouldn't reply right! Be strong! I also know it works. Just don't reply. Who is she to deserve YOUR reply! Hah! This is very true, someone also said on my thread that dumpers are the ones that did the dumping and should therefore have to deal with the consequences. Today is my first day of NC with my ex and I wish you the best of luck with yours Link to comment
Tanzi Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 all women say crap like that when they brake up . its call releasing the guilt. Thats a bit of a generalisation - believe me, men do it aswell!! Link to comment
standupfor Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 with any break up i really don't think you can take anyones words at face value from the start , sometimes words like that as many have said are a guilt release .only after time has passed can you tell there true feeling and if they have really moved on Link to comment
becca0194 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 This is very true, someone also said on my thread that dumpers are the ones that did the dumping and should therefore have to deal with the consequences. Today is my first day of NC with my ex and I wish you the best of luck with yours You all should be NC buddies for support !! Link to comment
sfits Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 yes i agree if anybody wants support and be NC buddies pm me,that would be so good Link to comment
becca0194 Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 I think that she is really young and she means every word of what she says right now. I think there is chance down the road you guys can come back together. You need to give her time. I don't think in a week she will change her mind. It sounds like she needs time to grow and find her own way. The best thing you can do is go NC. Maybe tell her that this is hard for you and it is better that you not be friends at this time. Explain that it is painful for you and not because you hate her. Then STICK TO IT. Spend time here reading posts. It helps. One day at a time !! Link to comment
sfits Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 i will do that becca0194 its been 3 months since we broke up but NC is the way to go and maybe down the road we may end up together. Link to comment
ironman Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 should you go NC on her birthday ? Link to comment
sfits Posted May 28, 2009 Author Share Posted May 28, 2009 should you go NC on her birthday ? i would if i was you, NC all the way Link to comment
sfits Posted June 8, 2009 Author Share Posted June 8, 2009 nearly 21 days of NC for me so far..im so happy im doing the NC..im feeling much better Link to comment
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