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Is this game playing???


applelover

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I asked a girl I have been "seeing" out yesterday for some time this week and she said that sounds good she just needs to figure out when. She has done this before where she needs to check her schedule and get back to me. Sometimes she does and sometimes I have to follow up. If she didn't want to go, would she just say she's busy from the beginning. We have gone out after she has done this in the past so I don't know if it is a game she is playing. I know she knows how I feel and I am on the fence about how she feels. When we are together everything is cool but the in between is where I get confused. I also seems if I ask her to go somewhere fancier I usually get a yes or no about her availability a lot sooner than if I just ask about a movie or something low key like that. What are your thoughts?

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I really don't know. I know she lives by her planner and can't remember anything without it. Sometimes its as soon as 20 minutes later I hear form her. I have a bad habbit of following up a day or two later. One time I decided to wait it out and see if I hear from her and about 3-4 days later I got a text saying sorry she hasnt got back to me and then told me when she could go. It's all very confusing to me. I almost feel like its a matter of her seeing if something "better" comes up.

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its been about 3 months since we started what i would consider seeing each other. we hung out a few times before that too. we really havent been out too many times.

 

she has asked me out a couple of times when i couldnt go and then once when i could although that ended up getting canceled.

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she seems interested. we talk on the phone a little and text mostly. which i dont like but our work schedules are opposite so its hard to find time to talk rather than text. i do most of the initiating but if i wait i usually hear from her. i am just really bad about trying to wait and end up giving in and calling her. i have actually know her for a couple of years and she had never been the type to initiate contact with me, but whenever i call her she answers or calls back. we only started really keeping in touch the since about the beginning of the year when we started hanging out. and after about the third date i started to develop feelings for her and it seemed to be mutual.

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You are not on her priority list.

 

I don't believe she is very interested in you.

 

Next time when you make a date and she says "I will get back to you", go out and get a new phone number from a new girl and make the date with her instead and when your girl finally gets back to you, tell her "oh I am sorry when you didn't get back to me, I made other plans with (Insert girl name here).

 

That is the best lesson you can teach her and the best reward you can give yourself.

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Next time when you make a date and she says "I will get back to you", go out and get a new phone number from a new girl and make the date with her instead and when your girl finally gets back to you, tell her "oh I am sorry when you didn't get back to me, I made other plans with (Insert girl name here).

 

What good could come from an attempt at making this girl jealous?

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What good could come from an attempt at making this girl jealous?

 

To make her care. Introduce a little bit of competition and his girl won't be able to afford to look at her calendar anymore, that is if she still cares.

 

So far its seems as if she doesn't care about this guy because she needs to check her calendar to see whether she has something better to do and if not then she will settle for him. She is making him feel like left over liver and onions.

 

Now when a guy is dating several women and women know or think he does or has that aura about him that he is wanted by other women, then the guy doesn't have to settle for this kind of treatment. Who knows maybe he is going be more compatible with the new girl and forget about the old one.

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I don't think he should do that to make her jealous, he should do it because she's not making him a priority so he shouldn't make her one. He should be out dating other people to see if he can find someone he is more compatible with.

 

And if I'm on the fence about someone, having him tell me that he made a date with another girl is just going to turn me off more. It wouldn't make me want to date him more. So if he says this to her, he can just say, sorry but I made other plans when I didn't hear from you. He doesn't have to say it's with another girl.

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Yet another schedule checking thread. I remember back to the busiest time in my career, literally sixteen hour days seven days a week for months, and could always respond to a social invitation immediately or within the hour.

 

OP, she could be gaming, or could be just not really interested, who knows. Up to you as to whether you can put up with this. Don't get down in the mud with her and try to make her jealous, just cultivate other options.

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i dont think i want to go the route of trying to make her jealous. to me that is just playing another game. its not like i schedule my life around tentative dates with her. if we dont have something confirmed i am willing to make other plans without her. she doesnt have a whole lot of nights she can go out to begin with because of her work and i know she has a huge group of friends that she hangs out with. maybe i am not asking enough in advance or maybe, as others have said, i am not very high on her priority list. what confuses me though is once we are together it feels so right and she acts like she is in to me. she tells me i am sweet, compliments me sometimes, and not afraid of a little physical contact.

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Have you thought of having that conversation with her to figure out where you stand and where she sees this headed? Is she interested in this turning into a relationship down the line or if she interested in just casual dating? I think asking her is the only way to get a real answer since her actions aren't clear.

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Well you can emphasize that point, that you like the way things are going. You just want to make sure you're on the same page as to where it's headed. That if things keep progressing the way they are, that it has the possibility of turning into a relationship. Basically you want to know if she even wants a relationship at this point and isn't just looking for casual dating...because that's what it seems like you're doing right now.

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I can go either way. I like when a guy plans something cool for us to do. I also like coming up with interesting creative dates. But i don't like it to be lopsided-always me planning, or always him planning.

 

I'm in a similar situation with girl I have been dating about 6 months or so. Ladies: are you more willing to accept dates for something specific? Or is asking if they want to hang out and do something ok?
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Frankly, I think this scheduling game is because she's probably seeing other guys. Who knows how many she is juggling-she may be trying to fit them all into her schedule along w/her other commitments, like work etc.

 

OP, why don't you ask her why it seems to take her so long to get back to you all the time?

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What good could come from an attempt at making this girl jealous?

 

Who said anything about making her jealous. It's about filling the time slot with people you find interesting. If it's nothing serious and she's not that interested then why should he sit around twiddling his thumbs waiting for her?

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She's Not Texting Me Like She U...
She's Not Texting Me Like She Used To

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