Knotty Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Seems like there are a lot of mixed signals being sent/received and the confusion makes people wonder if someone likes them. So I'm curious, what signals would you want to receive to definitively know that someone likes you. And what signals do you send to let someone know you like them? I mean from the time you first meet until you are making out, having sex, in a relationship or whatever point you are certain the person likes you. This is actually pretty hard to think about because many signals aren't strong enough and can be misinterpreted, so it's hard to come up with things that show certain interest. You have to look at things from other people's perspective and when you do you realize that the signals you send aren't always clear indications. I think by hearing other people's perspective I'd get better at sending clear signals and reading girls' signals. I think in the past I've sent out mixed signals and turned a lot of girls off and I don't want to do that anymore. Link to comment
Knotty Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 Signals I would want to receive to feel certain a girl liked me She makes some attempt to continue the conversation with me. It could be saying something if it looks like I am going to end the conversation and leave, or just standing there a little longer after we didn't have anything else to say. If this happened I would probably ask for her number and say I'd like to talk another time or something. If a girl asked about my free time, like what I'm doing later or on the weekend. If she mentioned that she had free time and didn't have anything to do at a particular time I would interpret that as she wanted to do something with me, so I might ask if she was interested in doing something. If we were meeting to go out and she seemed excited to be seen with me, that would make me feel like she liked me. Like if when we walked she was right next to me, maybe even touching as we walked. On a date, if she becomes quiet and looks at my lips, then she wants me to kiss her. If I get to the point of kissing then I'm certain that she likes me or it becomes obvious how much she likes me. Signals I would give to someone that I wanted to date Same as the conversation signal I want to receive. If it seems like I want to keep talking even if the conversation should naturally end and I'm hesitant to end it. That means I'm waiting for a signal from her. If she doesn't smile or give me a clear signal, then I feel like she is just being polite and waiting for me to stop talking and leave, so I do. If I ask general questions about what she does in her free time, then I'm hoping that she tells me she has free time. Then I feel like it's easier to ask her out. Asking for a girl's number usually means I like her, but sometimes I will ask for one as if it's just for friendly reasons. So I guess if I ask for a number and add that I will call her or that we should go out, then that's a strong signal from me, but some girls might think that doesn't mean much from most guys. Link to comment
Timebandit Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Eye contact, touch, erect posture, smiling etc. are often signs of someone being interested. Link to comment
Casey13 Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 She tells you she likes you, that is if shes being honest. Any other so called 'signal' could be as false as G. Bush's exist speach because we are all so different. Link to comment
Knotty Posted May 17, 2009 Author Share Posted May 17, 2009 @Timebandit All you do to show interest in a girl is eye contact, touch, erect posture and smile? Does she ask you out after that? @Casey13 How many girls tell you they like you out of the blue? Link to comment
Timebandit Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 @Timebandit All you do to show interest in a girl is eye contact, touch, erect posture and smile? Does she ask you out after that? Don't expect her to do the asking out. Most girls don't do that. You have to grab the bull by its horns yourself. Becoming sure that someone likes you, I think is something that grows over time. I mean, you could even sleep with a woman and find out that all she really wanted was your body *ahem* So I think it is more an ongoing pattern of someone showing interest in you, taking time to be together with you and seemingly enjoying your company. There is no single signal. Link to comment
COtuner Posted May 17, 2009 Share Posted May 17, 2009 Initiating contact is HUGE for me. At my age (thirty eight) I assume most guys are married or in serious relationships, so I don't usually do more than look at a guy. If he comes up to me out of the blue with a smile and starts talking about anything at all, he'll start me wondering if there's a reason for that. Flashing your left hand to show there's no ring is also good, although not a sign of interest. It at least allows me to know you're single so I continue to take what you're doing in the right spirit. Yes, I'll look. If I'm giving you back a positive signal (not trying to excuse myself and quickly leave), some sort of compliment about what caught your attention about me would be nice, although I'll take some sort of lead in to further conversation at some point as perfectly acceptable also. Compliments can often ring hollow so further interest in talking might be the better way to go. Since I meet most guys through my work, there's plenty of excuses and opportunities for further conversation. If someone tried to pick me up elsewhere, all I can say is, don't do what the 20 year olds do. It really does not work on me, it just annoys me (very open sexual flirting). I think I'd be a tough pick up, to be honest. Best thing would be to suggest meeting up at lunch or for coffee and ask for my business card, or give me yours. Link to comment
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