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screwed up last thread sorry...

me and my ex (that i want back) have LC

but LC... how much is too little (if i talk to her but ignore text time to time)

how much is too much?

do i include ANY feelings?

do i act as if we are "just friends"?

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first of all your setting yourself up to fail by using lc/ nc as a means to get her back...that being said...one thing i can advise is to always...AND I MEAN ALWAYS...dont be a wimp show her your a man in not making the first call...let her call you...if she doesnt then you know its time to start moving on...because if u press and push she'll think even less of you and look to the next guy who comes in her life who isnt a pansy. I am sorry to be so brash with you but sometimes we all need a kick in the pants to remember we still have testies.

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Its hard mate ive been trying it for the last two weeks, every time we get a little closer she pulls away, and im not pushing things. Its has been her to talk little things about future and when i said one thing got it thrown back in my face. Be carefull because it does hurt doing lc

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seriously guys if shes not working to be with you then she doesnt deserve you...trust me...i was in a turbulent relationship where we broke up on and off and i knew exactly what i had to do to get us back together...and getting back together was the worst thing i could have done because it kept me from being with the love of my life...because my stupidity thinking i wanted this girl so bad because she represented someone who wanted me (back when i found my self worth in other people not myself). But when i finally broke it off, a friend of mine took that opportunity to start escalating our friendship and now i understand what its like to be in a healthy relationship and there is no heart ache...no fretting if she loves me as much as i love her...no wondering if shes going to find someone better because i know that she absolutely adores me and sees in me what i for so long have failed to do.

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i kinda have got to talk to her because we were mates before and its kinda complicated. i have used NC and she has been textin me now and again, but i used very lc... just general chat. but if i do... just act as if we never dated?

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i kinda have got to talk to her because we were mates before and its kinda complicated. i have used NC and she has been textin me now and again, but i used very lc... just general chat. but if i do... just act as if we never dated?

 

 

dont be the one to call her, let her call you...FLAT OUT...and when she calls this is the demeanor you want to get off...im really good at getting women back although i do not advise doing so because all your getting back is a broken relationship...but nonetheless if you want to get her back...if there is still a chance... then you must not be the first to call her and when she calls you give off the attitude that you want to give off is that you care...although dont tell her directly, listen to her issues her what ever...but make sure you mention yours, mention issues your having that makes you look better...Like, "there is this guy on my rugby team that just hasnt got the picture yet, i think ill burn him some games on to a cd and maybe that will help some" Here you build yourself up in A.) being active, B.) helping out someone socially lower on the totem pole. C.) Looking for her advice without directly asking it. But you dont whine to her about your problems you dont ask her for her advice but you allow her to give it to you if she wants.

 

But again you have got to man up if u want there to be any chance and by manning up i mean you must start living your life and take the understanding that she may be apart of your wonderful life if shes willing to do the work to get back into your good graces assuming shes the one who called it off...if shes not then shes not worth your time and effort.

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thats exactly the advice i needed. its just our situation is really quite complicated. and im just hoping one day ill get her back. just screwed things up a bit, now its just a waiting game for me (by that i dont mean im gonna sit and wait all my life) ...like i said. its complicated

if anyone else has a little more advice, that would be great!

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thats exactly the advice i needed. its just our situation is really quite complicated. and im just hoping one day ill get her back. just screwed things up a bit, now its just a waiting game for me (by that i dont mean im gonna sit and wait all my life) ...like i said. its complicated if anyone else has a little more advice, that would be great!

 

It's always complicated... everyone's situation is 'different'... Everyone says that.

 

Sorry bud... but the dynamics are generally always the same.

 

Basically you’re trying to be her friend to win her back. While it feels all warm and fuzzy the reality is that it never tends to work out that way. You’ll end up hurt and feeling used. forgotten1 has some good points. You might want to listen.

 

Here's a thread I started on this exact same approach you're trying...

 

 

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Being a woman, I'd advise you--disappear on a horse If she calls, do talk. But don't initiate right now. Never pander to her emotions. Be gentlemanly, and like forgotten1 suggested, talk rugby. But don't rehash your mistakes and dissect your relationship. Yes, acting like you have never dated is a good idea. Basically, you have to ooze confidence. Think your favorite movie star. It sounds corny, but helps a ton. Trust me. (I always tell people--think James Bond if you are a man, and Audrey Hepburn if you are a woman--you get the picture)

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thanks again for the advice... is it ever to late to just "fall off the earth" ? since i have been using some LC?

 

and "IMA bad man" thanks for that link.. it sounds reeeaaally familiar to my story... like... really the same lol. so now its suggested i just "drop off the earth" ?

 

thanks

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