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Letters I would write to the new guy or girl in my ex's life


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I thought this would be interesting..

I'll start..

 

Dear new guy,

 

You probabley can't even believe you landed a girl like this.Gorgeous,sweet genuine,killer bod and a real wildcat in the sack.

I remember feeling like you I could do no wrong for the first few months she loved everything about me.I thought I'd died and gone to heaven.

Then gradually little things would set her off into a rage at first I thought PMS oh well I can deal with this.Then the insane jealousy,if a good looking girl was even in view I was accused of checking her out even if I didn't notice she was there.You'll love this,get used to walking with her staring at the ground.Eventually you'll be walking on eggshells around her not even being able to enjoy the good times because you'll always be waiting for the other shoe to drop.Oh yeah never complain to her about any of your problems because she won't care and any problems that she has she'll start to blame on you.It's only a matter of time before the bad days outnumber the good days I lasted 2 years before she coldly dumped me like a sack of garbage, I doubt you'll last as long before you get dumped.I doubt you'll dump her as she'll put this spell on you that will kill your self esteem so you'll believe you can't do any better.Good luck you'll need it...lol.

 

Dumped guy

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dear basement dwelling bipolar boyfriend stealer,

 

You ought to know that he told me he would love me for ever, that he swore over and over again he would want to marry me. You ought to know that he does not think I am a crazy person but in fact a good person who deserves somebody great. Also, you should know he told me that the sex was better with me. I'm not lying. So he didn't leave me because you were better.

 

He left me because he wanted a door mat. He was immature and emotionally unavailable, and he wanted someone who wanted the immature things that he wanted. I sincerely hope that this bites both of you in the a**-- and that you are so happy with him you decide to go off your meds and go completely nuts and ruin his life. Even though I still unfortunately kind of love him or feel something for him, I totally think he deserves it.

 

And if you had any respect for other women, for sisterhood and solidarity and feminism, I would feel sorry for you for getting stuck with my leftovers, for getting stuck with such a man who had no time to change and who will inevitably discard you like a used condom when he is done with you, the way he did me. But since you are the kind of girl who seduces other women's boyfriends, I have no sympathy for you and I hope your life sucks.

 

If I ever run into you, boy will you be surprised because I am better looking, smarter, and I dress better too.

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Dear New Guy,

 

Things didn't work out with me and her....I still love her very very much but right now, the world is a massive place but only she and her circumstances exist. If you can tolerate being 12th fiddle to everything, good luck to you. Should you need any emotional support, alas, good luck to you. If you dare bring up a grievance....good luck to you. She doesn't have time. If you are willing to tolerate mind games and quips about how you will find someone else...good luck to you.

 

She doesn't feel good about herself but she should...underneath her fears and inside her beautiful exterior is a very special and wonderful woman, but you will be waiting a long time for her to become yours. She can't see herself as a lot of us saw her and I dare say that she will hurt you. And your esteem and confidence will take a hit if you invest yourself like I did. She may even resent you for loving her.

 

Did I mention.....good luck to you?

 

Yours faithfully,

The guy who gave everything but lost.

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Dear new guy,

 

I'm happy for you, yet at the same time I feel so sorry for you, as you have no idea what you've gotten yourself into. Her looks may have sucked you in, but her attitude will dry you up, and before you know it, you won't even know who you are anymore.

 

She will charm the socks off of you. You'll feel like she's the one before long, before long meaning before you realize that she is a deeply, DEEPLY troubled individual.

She will do VERY, VERY sweet things for you. Two days later, she will scream and yell at you over something you may have done better than her, or kick you out of her apartment just because. She'll apologize hours later, only to do it again soon after. When you recover and act like everything's ok, she'll make you feel like it was all your fault. You'll be walking on eggshells to the point that you won't even look forward to seeing her in a few hours out of fear. I don't care how "hard" you can be. She will break you. Maybe not now, maybe not 3 months from now. But she WILL break you.

 

She will tease, manipulate and control her way into your heart until you cast your life away to be her support. She will tell you everything you want to hear, and believe you me, she knows how to get into your head. You'll have plenty of arguments, and while you may think you know the best way to handle them, you'll suddenly forget those ways because she will confuse you with her irrational behavior. You'll get backed into a corner and stay there. Know your place, because if you speak your mind or disagree with her, you WILL pay the price. If you have an issue in regards to the relationship, she will make it all about her and you can take the blame, because it'll be all your fault.

 

She is an impulsive person. Your head will spin at how often she changes her mind, but no matter what advice you give, she knows better, and will either sway your judgment or make you feel like your opinion is stupid. If you go on a date, have a credit card ready, because she will expect you to pay, because she has bills and you don't. I know you do, and you know you do, but trust me...you DON'T. Your problems are petty. Hers take precedence. Unless you're Daddy Warbucks, you'll go broke before you know it.

 

She can be wild in the sack, but be prepared to wait up to a month for any sex, good or bad, possibly longer than a month...who knows. If you try to make a move, congratulations - your relationship is all about sex. If you don't try, congratulations - you don't love her anymore. Don't even try making out with her, chances are she doesn't feel like it. But when she wants it, you'd better step up. If you really want to get in bed with her, give her some booze. That's sarcasm. Don't ever take advantage of her.

 

Try not to spoil her - that was a big mistake that I made. Don't cater to her every whim, don't play into her games. If she wants something, she can get it herself. Don't ever forget who you are. Do the things you like. Don't abandon your friends or family for her.

 

So there you go, mister knight in shining armor. Do your best. You'll hear "poor me" stories until you feel sorry and bend for her. Again, you'll bend until you break. If you last longer than I could, I tip my hat to you. But do me one favor. Never, EVER cheat on her or hit her, and do not take advantage of her. If you do and I find out, I will personally lay you out where you stand. Despite all the problems I had with her, she was still a big part of my life, and doesn't deserve that. Treat her the best that you can, and if that's not enough, I advise you to walk away and maintain any sanity you have before it's too late. A couple of details as well: If you ever throw a snowball at her, the two of you are OVER. And she's not kidding. And don't ever breathe near her ear. Just two things that really make her tick.

 

I loved her with everything I had, whether she believed it or not. I suggest you do the same. Just accept that it may not happen and take it slow...VERY slow.

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P.S

 

I forgot about these things.If you have any friends or family you enjoy hanging out with say good bye to them now as she will view them as threats to your attention and will make you feel incredibily guilty for wanting to spend time with them and if you try to include her she'll refuse.Oh one other things whenever she gets really mad she'll threaten to kill you or tell you she hopes you die and fun stuff like that.

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But do me one favor. Never, EVER cheat on her or hit her, and do not take advantage of her. If you do and I find out, I will personally lay you out where you stand. Despite all the problems I had with her, she was still a big part of my life, and doesn't deserve that. Treat her the best that you can, and if that's not enough, I advise you to walk away and maintain any sanity you have before it's too late.

 

I loved her with everything I had, whether she believed it or not. I suggest you do the same. Just accept that it may not happen and take it slow...VERY slow.

 

Funny enough I feel the same way about my ex.She made my life hell but I still don't want anybody to hurt her.Your ex and mine must have been related..lol.

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Funny enough I feel the same way about my ex.She made my life hell but I still don't want anybody to hurt her.Your ex and mine must have been related..lol.

 

And it's funny...because even though I feel that way, part of me wants her to go through what she put me through so she can see for herself what she does to people.

 

I've never been in a fight in my life, but the second I'd find out someone was treating her badly, I'd probably knock him out, or at least try to. So I wish someone WOULD treat her that way, but at the same time I wish they wouldn't. I'm screwed up.

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Dear new girl:

 

I hope you're enjoying having him spend all of daddy's money on you. I also hope that he clued you in on his dark, dark, grotesque fetishes, which really drove me away. I hope that he restricts you from the world, I.E. taking away your "privileges" to AIM, Myspace, Facebook, this site, checking your e-mail and cell phone EVERY day at least TWICE a day, demanding 105% of your time, like he did to me. I hope he cuts you down and calls you fat and regulates what you eat all of the time like he did to me, so you can look just how he wants. I hope you're never emotional, because he won't know how to deal with it, and will shut you out. And I hope you're ready to be "broken up with" at any moment due to his inability ot make up his mind. I also hope you have to deal with him constantly wanting and desiring other girls, and calling you by their names in bed.

 

Sincerely,

the one he promised forever to

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Dear Small, overmuscled chump

 

You must be in 7th heaven right now. Who would ever have thought a stuttering, ugly, hairy little man like you would ever find such an exquisite girl falling into your lap? Well, I imagine she finds it comforting to have someone like you around, someone that is too cowardly to tell her how you really feel, so she can go on pretending you don't feel anything at all. She is a very very special person, and even though she could probably do with a bit of heartbreak, if you hurt her, I will hurt you more.

Good luck

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Dear *insert name her*

 

The first thing I want you to know is that I am more than happy to see my ex move on again. I am never going to be a threat to you. Knowing how much pain I go through feeling inferior to my boyfriend's ex I don't want you to ever feel that way because of me. We loved eachother once, of course, but it just wasn't meant to be. It's over, completley over, I am completley out of the picture and that will never change. I've been wanting him to find happiness with someone else ever since we broke up so I really wish the best for you guys

 

I will give you one word of warning though, so you don't fall into the same trap that I did. Be very warey of his family when you meet them. Trust me, it is what started our downfall when we were together. They are the sort of people who will never be satisfied with any girl he brings home. If you go to their home, bring flip flops and wear them at all times around the house except when on the rub by the dinner table. Be very formal. Make sure you are not the first one to serve your food at dinner times, watch what everyone else takes and copy them. This is vital with these people. Avoid talking to his sister as much as possible, there's no pleasing her so it's best to just steer clear. Try to keep meetings with his famiyl short and you'll be ok. I'm pretty sure he'll never bring a girlfriend home for so long again, so it'll be fine

 

I wish you all the best, and I hope you two bring eachother a load of happiness. Never compare yourself to me, because he's with you now, you can give him the happiness I couldn't keep up. I don't want him to be lonely just because I broke up with him, so I just want to give you friendly advice when it comes to one of the biggest damage causers there was when we were together. I'm nothing now in his life, I'm a closed chapter that's gone forever so you keep on going strong, let your chapter be the long one that lasts to the end of your story.

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Dear nobody aka guy she cheated on me with...

 

feels great doesnt it, shes pretty, intelligent, charming and what a body! She even got into bed with you when she was with me, bet you couldn't believe your luck could you? Shes cute when she sleeps and isnt that little laugh she does in her sleep to die for.

 

i know how amazing it all feels, cos it happened to me too, although she was single at the time so i didnt do the dispicable thing that you did. But i dont blame you for what you did? Your a red blooded male after all, yes i had rage towards you but i dont know you neither do i ever wish to know you cos quite frankly i think your a (insert appropriate expletive), but i knew her... i loved her with all my being.

 

enjoy the next month or so, take it all in. Get to know her family, especially her sisters, they are a lot of fun and will make you laugh a lot, the little one is a great and very special kid, take good care of her too, its all going to be a lot of fun. You better be able to make her laugh cos that smile is worth a million bucks. Enjoy having her on her arm, enjoy her cutesy ways, enjoy the softness of her skin and how good she always smells. Enjoy how funny she can be.

 

But you need to hope that your relationship never encounters any sort of hardship, i mean external hardship, like clashing work schedules or extended periods of time a part which i already know is going to be part of your time together. Cos this is the thing, im sure you think the world of her and will do whatever it takes for the sake of the relationship but guess what... she wont.

 

believe me mate, she told me how much she loved me on a daily basis, over and over. I didnt for a second have any clue that things would take a turn for the worse, like im sure you are feeling now. i bent over backwards for her when our work schedules clashed like im sure you are doing now, to see each other took EFFORT.

 

around this time i was made aware of one of my close family members being ill, to the point of this person being half the person they used to be due to illness/medication. It broke me down, but ive got her right? she is my rock, my shining light right? WRONG... she started to disappear, i can count the number of times she asked about my sick family member on one hand, despite us still being together. Do you know what that felt like? Telling her about what he was going through only to realise she actually wasnt listening to a word i was saying. So i call her on her distant behaviour at a time when i need her the most and guess what, she needs "space" awwwwww you poor thing.

 

but hey it gets better, around the same time you come along!!! You show interest, she is flattered, in a matter of weeks she is waking up next to you. Nice huh?! you got a great one there! Not selfish or self centred at all! No not at all immature, she never wants things her own way and is always willing to go out of her way to look out for others. Hmmmmm... remember these last 2 paragraphs yeah? Take it all in, savour it... read it again son.

 

She dresses nice huh? Like nice things, hows your wallet doing? Dont get me wrong im a generous person but come on man. Got any interests? yeah shes not interested, or at least she wont be soon. But buy her that bag and those shoes and then you may be able to string things out a bit longer. Want to do something out of her comfort zone? Forget it... come on, this is her we are talking about. Its not about you! or what you want,

 

Need a favour from her? better check her diary first mate, make sure it doesnt clash with activities such as napping, watching TV, being tired, having a headache and it better not be cold outside!!!

 

ok ok so now i am at risk of sounding bitter, i dont think i am bitter, i am heart broken though. I miss her good qualities, and that in essence does mean i miss her. There is a massive gaping hole in my life now that used to be filled by not only her but by her family and feeling part of that, it really sucks hard. But guess what? You know when you are doing a puzzle and you are sure that one piece should fit next to another and it almost does but the more you try and jam it in the more of a mess it becomes? Get ready to have a sore thumb...

 

Shes so loving though isnt she, tells you that a lot doesnt she. Yep she had me fooled too, not in a way that she didnt love me, cos im sure she did, i know she did. I just mean i was a fool to think that she has what it takes to pull her weight in a relationship at the moment. She is young, maybe she'll learn that sooner rather than later and you two will be ok. But i doubt it...

 

I dont know, maybe things will be different with you two, maybe you have got what it takes, maybe you can deal with a princess putting herself first most of the time? maybe you are better for her and her for you. If so, all the best... but do me a favour and remember one thing, remember i asked you to read over and savour those two paragraphs earlier? Read it one more time mate... theres a good lad.

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Dear L's New Partner-to-Be,

 

Does he let you call him "L" too? We had many nicknames for each other. What are yours?

 

I want you to not let him get too complacent. Speak up if he ditches you for videogames or wants to sit at home watching TV 24/7. Then again, don't wear the pants in the relationship because you will be wearing them forever and you will get tired of it.

 

L's a wonderful but immature guy. Don't let him charm you with his Transformers t-shirts and puppy dog eyes; he'll take advantage of you as much as you let him.

 

Here's a tip: If you want to be wrapped around his finger, let him do everything for you. He bends over backwards to help strangers but if you ask for anything, he'll get mad. So I suggest you make him think that helping you was HIS idea. Then he will be whipped. He was whipped with me the first few years because I was more emotionally volatile (yet closed) and dependent on him. He loved being my hero (afterall, look at his obsession with comic books). If you want him to be your hero, make him want to save you.

 

But be warned...he needs a lot of care, himself. If he's not willing to step up to the plate and be responsible, let him go now before you get sucked in like I did. He promised me a future, a family, a home together early on in our relationship but was never ready until the end. That's when he walked out!

 

Hopefully he's grown up now and maybe you're a stronger person than I am. He seems to worship strength yet dependency so maybe you're that person. See, I was a more emotional, open person, so he lost respect for me. Stay tough and bust his butt and he'll be eating out of your hand, sorry to say.

 

I love the guy, but good luck with him.

 

Love,

me

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Dear Skank:

I hate you for the fact that he forgot me so quickly, for you. I hate that you're cooler than me, have a cooler job, better hair, and more interesting friends. I hate that you are younger and prettier than me. I hate that he is forgetting our memories together, and you are tainting him with your gutter-loving filth.

 

I don't hate you, but you disgust me, and the thought of coming near him after you've touched him sickens me. Its unfortunate, because we had always planned to be together in the end.

 

 

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All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You

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