fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 i've dated some girls who are like this: when you break up with them due to their narcissistic and deceptive personality. they come crying to you. text you and write you letters, begging you to take them back. they tell you about their family issues, childhood issues, how they didn't have a good father figure, and blah blah blah. Then they tell you just how much they like/love you. how you are so special and they've never met anyone as unique as you are. so after this ego boost you fall for their web of lies. you think to yourself. wow!!! i'm really special and i hold the key to this girl's heart. i should take her back. after you take her back, after awhile, they will break up with you and start dating their next victim. then you're sitting at home all confused, hurt and sad. then post threads on this forum about what you should do, or how to heal, and etc etc. it took me awhile to recognize this pattern. even though the girls are different, they all seem tell similar lies. where did they learn this? after being fooled about 3 times and i will never fall for that BS again. i just feel bad for the other guys out there who will fall for it. Link to comment
doyathink Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Yeah, we're all wolves in sheep's clothing. Best that maybe you look toward another gender if females fail you so often. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 Yeah, we're all wolves in sheep's clothing. Best that maybe you look toward another gender if females fail you so often. did you not notice the "some girls" in the thread title? take your sarcasm elsewhere please. don't have something useful to say? don't say it. Link to comment
cykosomatik Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 you think to yourself. wow!!! i'm really special and i hold the key to this girl's heart. i should take her back. this is all I needed to read in your post...you allow yourself to get in those situations b/c you need someone like that to feel special...whether a "right" or "wrong" girl... are you special when you're single? do you feel that way? how do you attract girls? by pretending to be special and then you need them to fill up the job of making you feel special? I just think that you're getting into these relationships for the wrong reasons... you are special and don't need a woman to make you feel that, or man in general, if you do...I think something is amiss inside you. just my two cents. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 this is all I needed to read in your post...you allow yourself to get in those situations b/c you need someone like that to feel special...whether a "right" or "wrong" girl... are you special when you're single? do you feel that way? how do you attract girls? by pretending to be special and then you need them to fill up the job of making you feel special? I just think that you're getting into these relationships for the wrong reasons... you are special and don't need a woman to make you feel that, or man in general, if you do...I think something is amiss inside you. just my two cents. it's not the only thing i was thinking. if i wrote everything that's on my mind this thread would be too long. i take it you're a girl too. when someone complements you, is it not natural to feel happy? i'm not a women hater. i know some are good, some are bad. Link to comment
cykosomatik Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 I don't need to get a compliment to feel happy. If I get a compliment, it just affirms, what I already know about myself. Not that I need affirmation. It's more of a appreciation that someone appreciates me the same way I appreciate myself. I'm smart, I'm beautiful, and the list goes on....and I don't need anybody to feel that way. but if someone does need it, then they attract the same type of people, with same issues... good night Link to comment
waveseer Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 The river denial has tributaries (lies) that feed it until it becomes powerful enough to hurt us. Individuals from both genders have been known to perpetrate these lies and individuals of both genders have been known to believe them. You are not alone. Link to comment
doyathink Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 did you not notice the "some girls" in the thread title? take your sarcasm elsewhere please. don't have something useful to say? don't say it. I wasn't being sarcastic at all. This is how your post comes accross. Sorry if that isn't the 'advice' you were looking for. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 I'm smart, I'm beautiful, and the list goes on....and I don't need anybody to feel that way. lol i guess you don't need this forum then. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 I wasn't being sarcastic at all. yes.. you weren't... Link to comment
cykosomatik Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 lol i guess you don't need this forum then. I'm here to offer my help if I can...that's all... you don't need "problems" to be on this forum Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 I'm here to offer my help if I can...that's all... you don't need "problems" to be on this forum yes, you have been very helpful. you've offered nothing but "i'm beautiful, i'm so smart" oh please... Link to comment
cykosomatik Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 yes, you have been very helpful. you've offered nothing but "i'm beautiful, i'm so smart" oh please... Well you need someone to make you feel that...keep that up...let me know how it goes down the line... Link to comment
top bloke Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 There always have been player girls and player boys. Maybe you have to realise the errors in your selection of these particular women. Maybe you just have self esteem issues and get sucked in. Start liking yourself more and youll be able to see through insincerity. You are worthy...if you need a woman to feel important then your setting yourself for more problems...hope this helps.. Link to comment
greywolf Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 so after this ego boost you fall for their web of lies. you think to yourself. wow!!! i'm really special and i hold the key to this girl's heart. i should take her back. so let me see if I got this right. You took a girl back because she made you feel special and not because how you felt about her? If that's true, then that's a problem right there. That's quite a responsibility to put on someone. it took me awhile to recognize this pattern. even though the girls are different, they all seem tell similar lies. where did they learn this? after being fooled about 3 times and i will never fall for that BS again. i just feel bad for the other guys out there who will fall for it. I think you need to ask yourself why this has happened so many times to you. If there is a pattern, then the problem is with you. Otherwise, you must be pretty weak to have become a 'victim' of so many females. Link to comment
Timebandit Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 I assume these girls are using this pattern because it works. But focus on your own patterns instead of other people patterns. Don't fall for cheap words of flattery. Simple as that. Link to comment
Anyway Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 ...they tell you about their family issues, childhood issues, how they didn't have a good father figure, and blah blah blah. If you hear anything like that from a girl, run as fast as you can! so after this ego boost you fall for their web of lies. you think to yourself. wow!!! i'm really special and i hold the key to this girl's heart. i should take her back. It's all show and fighting for your attention. Never give in. it took me awhile to recognize this pattern. even though the girls are different, they all seem tell similar lies. where did they learn this? Family and childhood issues may lead to disordered personalities. They have to figure it out themselves. Don't try to rescue them. after being fooled about 3 times and i will never fall for that BS again. i just feel bad for the other guys out there who will fall for it. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Hopefully, you finally learned your lesson with this girl. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 thanks for all the useful info. i should say i've only fell for it twice. as the third time i just walked away and not looked back since. the letter she wrote me was ridiculous. she said that i was so nice to her and was there for her when she needed me the most. yeah, i was so important to her she'd lie right in my face about another guy. get this, they are "just friends". what a load of BS. some girls have no shame these days. i fell for it the 2nd time cuz i thought to myself maybe it's different this time. when i chose to take them back not just cuz they make me feel good. i genuinely liked them. i wont be making this mistake ever again. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 and to you ladies out there who might take offense to this. i'm not a women hater. this situation can easily apply to both genders. for simplicity, i simply wrote what i experienced. i'm sure there are guys who lie to their girlfriends with no shame. Link to comment
fiatyamaha Posted May 9, 2009 Author Share Posted May 9, 2009 Well you need someone to make you feel that...keep that up...let me know how it goes down the line... i don't necessarily need someone to feel that way. however bragging about it on the internet shows another problem you may or may not have. Link to comment
Nutz Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 What you just described is the hallmark of link removed. On second thought I may be confusing it with link removed. Meh, hit the links and decide for yourself. I'm pretty sure it's HPD though. Link to comment
littleHorse Posted May 9, 2009 Share Posted May 9, 2009 Hey I am truly sorry that these are the type of women that you are attracting to yourself. No should ever be played like that guy or girl. I attracted a$$oles for the longest time and what I found is that I had to change myself before I started attracting the good apples. I spent time on myself, truly figuring out who I was and biult up my self confidence to a point where I no longer felt i needed a relationship to be happy. And that is when I started recognizing red flags and even if I met a bad apple, it didnt bother me even ten times as much. I have also had the opportunity of meeting some good apples. No golden apples yet, but im okay with that. Link to comment
Reborn1607307994 Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 The idea I'm getting is that all the "good" girls (ie. the ones who don't lie) are already taken. That's certainly the impression I'm getting. (By the way, no offense intended to any single girls who aren't liars! Link to comment
Anyway Posted May 12, 2009 Share Posted May 12, 2009 thanks for all the useful info. i should say i've only fell for it twice. as the third time i just walked away and not looked back since. the letter she wrote me was ridiculous. she said that i was so nice to her and was there for her when she needed me the most. yeah, i was so important to her she'd lie right in my face about another guy. get this, they are "just friends". what a load of BS. some girls have no shame these days. Sounds familiar Link to comment
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