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Guy friend causing drama....


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okay, so i need advice on this situation because everything I have done has been pointless.

 

Background: Since September, one of my best guy friends has been acting very different than usual. He used to be very caring and kind but since then he has turned into an ass. I've found out through mutual friends that he has been saying a lot of negative and hurtful things about me behind my back. So when he calls me, I don't pick up my phone since i have no interest in talking to him. So now he's upset that we never talk on the phone and that I don't make an effort in this friendship.

 

Recently: I decided to call him out on all the things he had been saying. I wasn't mad at him or anything. I told him that I just needed to hear why he was saying these things. He basically got upset and said that he never said anything bad in the first place. I decided to let it go and said that if he has a problem, to come talk to me about it and not drag our friends into it. He agreed.

 

Now, i hear from mutual friends that he is STILL bad mouthing me. I'm getting fed up with the situation and don't know what do. Remind you, this is a 24 year old man I'm dealing with! Any advice?

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You know what to do because you already did it once. Either he's lying of the friend is lying. You seem to believe the other guy more than the guy friend. So cut him off and move on and let it fall like water off a duck's back.

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yeh, either he or your friend is lying. But since you said he has changed and turned into a jerk anyway, I think its very likely that your guy friend is the one lying and is in fact saying bad things about you behind your back.

 

 

Anyway doesnt matter if he is bad mouthing you, just this line "one of my best guy friends has been acting very different than usual. He used to be very caring and kind but since then he has turned into an ass" would be reason enough for me to end a friendship .

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my friends say that he's just unhappy that everyone around him is in a relationship and he's bitter for being single. I don't know why that's my fault though?

 

That's why I asked about his being jealous. He may want to be more than friends.

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you know that thought crossed my mind but he hasn't given any indication to liking me more than a friend. We were both single at the same time back in january and nothing ever happened. He was chasing other girls and he still is.

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Well, guys do often turn sour when they like someone and feel they cannot act on it, and I've seen similar to this in those cases. No way of knowing, but it's the first thought that came to mind, and if he's skirt chasing aimlessly, that sort of goes along with it too. But I'll bow out.

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ummmm....well let's see: he's upset if I never call him. He was upset that I had gotten back with my boyfriend but the things is, he was never there for me when we had broken up and he went around telling people I should get over it. It's just little things that he gets upset over and confronting him hasn't worked.

 

Oh and recently he started bad mouthing another one of my close friends (female also). I just don't get it. I mean most guys i know, hate drama. But he seems to like it

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so would you guys end the friendship or still try to talk it out? I've gotten to a point where (at least for now) i don't want to put effort to fixing things. Since he won't be honest, it feel pointless to continue trying to coax it out of him.

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I've been there. He has issues, basically. He likes you but he's never going to do it the right way, he can only torture you and make your life miserable. Better to forget him before he screws you over.

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