Jump to content

What does a man in his forties want in a soulmate?


Recommended Posts

He has reached his late forties without ever finding a soulmate but he keeps trying.

He is extremely intelligent.

He is quite amusing.

he likes opera and choral music alot.

He likes the cinema.

he reads.

he is interested in politics.

he has a successful job.

he loves his farm.

he loves his dogs.

he loves his sport.

he loves his horses.

He likes to eat good food.

he likes to drink fine wine and beer.

he likes to smoke a bit.

He enjoys his money but knows he spends too much.

He likes the theatre

He has a good sense of humour.

He likes a glamorous women but glamorous women don't like farms.


He has met she.

She is a little shy and reserved. It took him awhile to get to know her but now shes opening up a bit.

She is in her late thirties.

He finds she very physically attractive.She is slim with great legs and shoulder length naturally blonde hair.

He finds her to be quite intelligent.

He sees that she is easy going and generally in a sunny mood.

She likes music but isn't as knowledgeable as him.

She loves the cinema ans is extremely knowledgeableabout it.

She reads.

She is interested in politics and current affairs.

She works in the same area as him and is almost as successful.

She grew up in the country and has no problem running around a muddy field.

She knows very little about sport.

She likes horses but has no real experience of them except forthe occasional pony trek.

She likes to eat nice food.

She doesn't drink but likes to socialise in bars. She will drive you home.

She doesn't smoke but will stop the car if you need to. She won't criticise, all her family smoke ( and drink sometimes)

She likes to spend her money on clothes, books, theatre and travel but has saved a bit. she odesn't like to be in debt.

She is witty and has a great sense of humour. She loves laughing and always laughs at his jokes while throwing in a few of her own.He teases her and she always takes it well.

She is always glamorously dress with very light make-up.



She is his friend. The question is, given what they do and do not have in common is she soulmate material?

He doesn't want to risk losing a lovely friend but he really wants to find a soulmate.

Is she the one???

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If he really needs to ask this question, then maybe she isn't ...


... then again, maybe he doesn't really need to ask the question because he knows the answer in his heart of hearts, but being a very intelligent man, maybe, just maybe, he doesn't trust messy, irrational things like emotions (horrible generalisation I know! Eeeep!) and is seeking the validation of others on rational grounds. A checklist, bullet points, jolly rational, can be quantified. Percentages can be calculated. Sales figures can be projected ... sorry, I'm being very flippant here ...


I think you already know the answer to your own question.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

She is his friend. The question is, given what they do and do not have in common is she soulmate material?

He doesn't want to risk losing a lovely friend but he really wants to find a soulmate.

Is she the one???



Just go after her, cause if your not willing to risk your friendship with this girl for your potential soul mate, then your really not ready for your soul mate. That's pretty much it, give yourself fully to receive fully or not at all.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You like good tasting food? No way! Me too.


Hahaha, I love it when that's what people say they have in common.


Really finding your soulmate has nothing to do with what you guys like/dislike. When you find your soulmate, you enjoy things because you're doing them with him/her. So don't base whether or not someone is right for you based on your likes.


Whether or not they make you feel like you love life, and you love being with them, that's what decides whether you're meant to be or not.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know how long you have known this woman but knowing whether or not someone is your "soulmate" is a process. As you get to know someone you slowly come to that realization as the love builds. People who meet someone and within a few weeks say "that person is my soulmate" are simply caught up in the feelings of infatuation. Knowing someone is your soulmate happens over time as the love for that person evolves and deepens. Knowing someone is your soulmate is a feeling you get deep inside of you, in your soul and is fueled by the deep love that develops, not by the butterflies and pounding heart of the honeymoon stage. If you haven't known her that long then you need to give it time..if you have known her a long time and are questioning whether or not she is your soulmate..then she isn't. When someone is your soulmate, there is no doubt.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think people shoot themselves in the foot with the whole 'soulmate' ideal, that there is just one person out there for them and if they don't match on every single criteria or there is some little imperfection then it means they aren't your soulmate.


For a relationship to succeed, you need to really enjoy one another, respect each other, be attracted to each other, share common goals on the major things in life.


But every little detail on a laundry list doesn't have to match. In fact, the little differences can make it more exciting and get you out of a rut and interested in new things.


So put away the laundry list and ask yourself how she makes you feel. Are you comfortable with her? Do you like having her in your space? Do you communicate well, and feel more and more bonded to her the more you see her?


Lot for things like that, not whether she's only been pony treking.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have known her name for years. I even spoke to her a few times and she was always nice and could be very funny but I never rated her.

Then we were thrown together on a project and what impressed me was how intelligent, good natured and what a thorough and hard worker she was. She was always pleasant if a little distant.

Then some months ago she walked into my office and I realised that she was incredibly good looking. I mean she was the same person but I never realised how attractive she is. I asked her what she had done, was it the hair, it was short and blonde but now its long but it can't be just that.

I also noticed that she had long slender legs. She is very hot. However if I said anything she would get embarassed and try andchange the subject or be self-deprecating.

So I've taken her out for lunch with friends or for coffee and it is only recently she seems more relaxed. She makes a few jokes at my expense and used my name in conversation for the first time ever this week. Now that she seems to be relaxing im learning more about her and i like her even more.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

well yes, of course I was hoping someone would list and tell me whether they thought we were compatible.

I understand that if we both love each other then that supercedes that but we are not even dating yet so how can we love each other.

I was hoping someone would evaluate our chances.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Nobody has a crystal ball to tell whether two people will work out together.


Even very different people can get along fine, and people who are very similar can break up, so you can't use such lists to predict success. People have to also be emotionally compatible and have a spark between them, and that can't be determined in a list, only by dating.


The only real way to find out is to start dating the person, and you will grow closer or else realize there is nothing there. So if you really like her, i'd ask her out on a date to see if she's interested in spending more time with you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...