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I might be REALLY letting go of my ex. Realizing that there might be other fish in the sea after all


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This post if more of a journal entry... It might encourage others though.

- The story.

 

It has been an eventful two weeks for me. NC was broken between me and my ex after a relatively long period without talking. (30 days, a text, more 30-ish days).

 

On my birthday, he called and on the next week I e-mailed him a "good-bye" letter saying that although after these two months apart (4 apart, 2 of "NC") I still loved him, and I wanted him to know that, even though I was REALLY ready to let go and move on. Which I'm really starting to realize it's the truth.

 

He replied saying he is happy with his new gf, cares about me, etc... It was basically the e-mail I needed to say "enough... I'm done trying to get back together", I need to open up for new people and realize that this relationship is, INDEED, over. I also started to try to blame myself less for breaking-up with him in the first place.

 

Well, it's been the toughest 2-4-ish months of my life. For 2 months I barely wanted to leave my house, had severe panic/anxiety and even mild depression. I kept working and going to classes, but everything I did was obligation to move forward, to keep going.

 

Then, when I started to get a little better, I got hopes of getting my ex back... However, slowly but surely, and I documented it on my thread, I started meeting other people, going out with friends, having fun again, enjoying food again... the simple things you know??

 

I tried to go on a few dates with a guy during the first months and it was horrible, it wasn't good for me at all. However, these past few weeks I have started to VERY slowly, realize that there might be someone else that will make me as happy as my ex. That thought had been uninmanginable for me for months!

 

After this last exchange with my ex last week, things started to become more clear to me and I still managed to get better and better.

 

Last night I posted about feeling depressed after a long day of work and before the holiday, where he would be with his new girl on the beach and I would be alone. However, I decided to go out with my friends and have fun!

 

It was the best thing for me. I REALLY connected with a guy I had met some weeks before (posted about him on my thread some weeks ago) and I had one of the best nights of my life. Don't get me wrong, we had dinner and partied at a club until 7 am with a bunch of my friends and he just drove me home... but everything, being with my friends, dancing, him... everything made me happy. I had forgotten what a great night out was...

 

I'm not looking into a relationship with anyone now, but also, it's been 4 months after my ex and I stopped seeing eachother, over 1 year since we ended our relationship, I am 22, and I feel like I'm starting to REALLY open up for new people.

 

I have no idea if me and this guy are going to work out, it was a very intense, complicated...yet romantic time, but at the same time, it might have only been a reminder that my heart is still alive and that even though it might not be this one, someone else, who's just as great as my ex, who has his same values, who share my values... will come along.

 

I REALLY BELIEVE THAT NOW. I REALLY DO.

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BRAZILGIRL! I remember you and your story. It was such a soap opera, I swear! But I gotta say, you are one amazing young woman. You are strong and independent, and you will meet someone else, I promise you that.

 

I am so happy that you are feeling better. Time really does heal all wounds. I have let go of my ex a while back and let me tell you, it feels great to kick someone toxic out of your life. I am much happier than ever before. Even though your ex didn't mean to hurt you, his words and actions still hurt you and you need to get away from those things, you know?

 

It's been a bit over 2 months since the break up and I've been doing just great. I have a good feeling that I might meet someone special really soon, and you know what? I have a feeling also, that you, Brazilgirl, will meet someone a hundred times better than your ex. You may not believe me, but you will someday. Promise.

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"I have no idea if me and this guy are going to work out, it was a very intense, complicated...yet romantic time, but at the same time, it might have only been a reminder that my heart is still alive and that even though it might not be this one, someone else, who's just as great as my ex, who has his same values, who share my values... will come along."

 

...as my ex, as my ex...

^^^ you need to re-evaluate that crap there

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RE: ""Realizing that there might be other fish in the sea after all ""

 

there SURE as hell are sweetheart...lots of 'em...sure doesn't mean you're compatible with all of 'em of course but then again you weren't either with your ex or you'd still be together right?

 

...dump the wishful thinking denial and hanging on...

 

just remember that your emotions will come and go: up and down: back and forth: good and bad...but it will pass.

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The thing is, I was VERY compatible with my ex. We broke up because I got GIGS and was too immature to realize how much my bf meant to me... I was "bored" with my perfect relationship.

 

However, what I'm having to work with now is that although my ex was great, there ARE other great guys. And you know, my ex being great only means I am special myself, for someone so special to have loved me that much. I am just starting to finally realize that there might be other people out there and having a new relationship (my ex was my first and only) may be the best thing for me in the future, considering that if I had stayed with the ex, I might have wondered forever if he was really the "one" for me. I gained maturity and experience to realize that after 3 years together, love is much different than the initial butterflies. However, only living and learning I was able to learn that.

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