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Love really isnt a game


SapphireNoir10

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I think you realise eventually that when your in love, its generally easy and there are more good times than bad and that you can work through most things.

 

But love isnt a game, it isnt one person making all the effort and one personc chasing or needing a break.

 

I think you know when someone loves you, you dont need to worry, you just kinda FIT if you get me, and yeah theres arguments but I think their get overable.

 

Its like I am now, sat in my dressing gown on the computer whilst my guy cooks dinner lol. Thats what it should be.

 

What Im trying to say is...

 

What do you guys see as love?

 

Whats love to you?

 

Lets talk about it!

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I completely get where you're coming from..

I have the same with my current bf, and it's a first for me. No games.. Little bad times, more good times. Sometimes a disagreement but that's about it.

 

Love to me is going over to each others place. Doing things together. Waiting to get off work to see the other (though some may argue this is borderline clingy lol). Just grabbing a bite to eat together which seems fun. A kiss.

Or like yesterday: sitting in his oversized tee, on his lap while we have a convo and him looking at me like I'm the prettiest girl ever.

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I completely get where you're coming from..

I have the same with my current bf, and it's a first for me. No games.. Little bad times, more good times. Sometimes a disagreement but that's about it.

 

Love to me is going over to each others place. Doing things together. Waiting to get off work to see the other (though some may argue this is borderline clingy lol). Just grabbing a bite to eat together which seems fun. A kiss.

Or like yesterday: sitting in his oversized tee, on his lap while we have a convo and him looking at me like I'm the prettiest girl ever.

 

Yeah but its like, there isnt clingy when it feels right, because neither of you CAN be too clingy.

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I met a good person. You cant always tell if they will be good to you or you'll fall in love BUT a lot of my past relationships I ignored red flags. Dont ignore bad stuff about them chances are it'll be a big issue.

 

You have to be happy in YOU a relationship isnt the be all and end all, and the person needs to love you and put as much in as you do.

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Love is teamwork.

 

It's laying all your cards on the table. Learning your partners moves as you go along. Constantly getting closer but never reaching that point of truly knowing everything about each other. Every day should move you a bit closer but you shouldn't find yourself bored in knowing all. However, you should feel comfortable and trusting that you are indeed moving closer to true understanding.

 

In bad times, It's fire on your backs running together. Partners in crime. Grabbing on to each other's hand and saying "we're getting out of this". It's never going it alone. It's looking into each other's eyes knowing that you could easily rip each other's hearts out and leave them in the dust as you run to hills but, yet simultaneously knowing that that won't happen. To stay together is to stay as a team. To be on bored for being unselfish yet at all times knowing what you want and being completely capable of expressing what you want to one another.

 

At its best, it's making each other sandwiches in the kitchen. It's waking up to someone and feeling like you haven't seen them in years. It's having your own language. Giving each other looks when you are among great friends who know you very well, and yet remain completely oblivious to what you are silently saying to each other. It's dancing to an ever changing tempo and relearning all your dance partners moves as the music plays on. It's transition could pull you farther or closer together but always having that central connection no matter what the steps are. Constantly adapting to each other.

 

It's a four hour long conversation/argument about side characters and their proper names in the book "Catch-22". And then afterwards the winner promises to the loser that they'll never again bring up the fact that they were right and that it was "Orr" and not that other guy who walked around with chestnuts in their mouth. But, later manages to work it into every other single argument about a book from now on.

 

Love is a game and it isn't a game. It's really how you define the rules that decide that. I'd consider my love that I have with my boyfriend a game. An exciting new game all the time. It's rather hard to explain, actually. And, I've lost my train of though.

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Thats beautiful DW, and very very accurate. I agree with it very much.

 

It shouldnt be a game with people playing with eachothers feelings and emotions. It can be exciting and new like a game with certain rules I guess.

 

Love to me is just being ME and having that person love me, and being able to talk about anything and everything. To be able to have no makeup on and be told I look lovely. To have someone pick me up when I feel down and for me to do the same for them. Its when your out shopping and you see things they'd like as well as yourself.

 

Little things.

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I agree with you BAG..

 

Love is like a union, where two people look out for eachother. When your in love with someone you want that person to be happy, your not the one who makes her/him cry or feeling lonely... When your in love with someone, you encourage that person to go after their dreams, you don't hold them back.

When your in love with someone, you want to share all your joy and all your happiness with that person.

 

While love is a wonderful thing, it is still important to have your own friends - friends that your boyfriend/girlfriend has been introduced too, but it is important that you still have your own social life ...

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I think what you are talking about is loving someone you are also highly compatible with. That is (relatively) easy and effortless and natural. My husband and I have been living together for just 2.5 months now. We had both heard the transition can be rocky.

 

Well he said to me yesterday - the same thing I typed a few days ago on this board! It feels like we've been doing this forever. It's because the transition was so smooth. And that's because we're extremely compatible.

 

And because we share the same beliefs and boundaries and standards and values - there's less scope for disagreement and the ones we do have can be worked out easily.

 

But again - thats loving someone you also happen to be compatible with.

 

I think you can love someone you are incompatible with and be in for a world of misery.

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It's when there's no bad feeling in the pit of your stomach, or worry that things will end.

 

When you think you can see that person around, hanging out, smiling with you, even if you're both old and sickly.

 

It's when there's mutual respect and you both can't get enough of each other, and let each other know that even if life intervenes.

 

It's when even if you don't like chocolate you bring him a candy bar on your way home, and even if he thinks flowers are stupid he still makes sure there's always some on the table.

 

I had this for a brief time in one of my relationships, and I'd really like to have it again.

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I have never had it "equal". I have always loved more than who I was with. This has always seemed to push them away. I hope one day I can experience what it would be like as some of you describe..

 

Omg, I know exactly what you mean...I always end up loving the guy more than he loves me, and it just pushes him away..I just had a relationship that ended because of it..I loved him very much and devoted every available moment I had to him, and completely lost myself..It was like my life revolved around him...He was completely focused on himself, which made me feel unimportant... =(

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