Questions to get to know each other better?

[enchanted771]

I have been seeing this guy, not long, 2 1/2 months. One month was just talkin though before we finally met. Anyways, he always ask questions about me like nationality of mom, dad, etc. Well, the questions led to him talking abot himself which is what I wanted. Anyways, I thought I should be asking questions because it shows interest and will help us get closer. I just always feel so akward...I dont know why. Any ideas or simple questions that will help?

[SapphireNoir10]

Just make sure it doesnt come accross like an interrogation or you dont ask awkward questions.

[enchanted771]

Thats what I mean!!!! he asked my last name and then i asked his. I try to make it light and breezy. But how do you casually ask others? nothing about ex's, just simple q's.

[SapphireNoir10]

Just liek 'So where are you from' Or 'Where are your parents from?' Just casual questions that crop up. Like if your talking about...sports be like 'So what sports do you like...what do you play?'

[enchanted771]

Good idea! I dont know why I got cold feet. When I think back, there were convos we had that i had opportunity to ask other questions casually. I got nervous or maybe it was the martini and I dont remember what i ask. lol seriously.

[SapphireNoir10]

Its ok it'll come in time, your just at the slightly uncomfortable stage when you dont know what you can say lol

[enchanted771]

Exactly! I just dont want him to feel like he is on trial or that i am writing his biography! lol

[WindowTo]

I usually like to ask very open ended questions. Sometimes it can be hard to get a good/any answer off of these, in which case you give your answer first to encourage them or just tell them to explain in more detail. This gives them a chance to show you their creativity and their unique self. Stuff like: What did you want to be when you were a little kid? What is your dream? Whats your story? If you could do anything what would it be? What is the most important thing to you in life? What do you love? Where do you want to travel, why? I also find that these questions do not really give off a judgmental vibe, more of an interested one. Besides, there is really nothing wrong with evaluating someone you are dating... It is pretty much what humans are designed for whether conscious or subconscious. There is just something wrong with giving off a judgmental vibe lol.

[mfan]

...I thought I should be asking questions because it shows interest and will help us get closer. I just always feel so akward...I dont know why. Any ideas or simple questions that will help?

Maybe comment on something you see and then turn it into a question? Like if you pass a cute dog, go "awwww, how cute. I like dogs. Did you ever have a pet growing up?"

 

Also, if you feel weird just asking out of the blue "What did you want to be when you were a little kid", then don't ask this question until it's a good time, like if you see a little girl wearing a firefighter hat, then you can go "I guess she wants to be a firefighter. What did you want to be when you were a kid?"

[Cool]

I have been seeing this guy, not long, 2 1/2 months. One month was just talkin though before we finally met. Anyways, he always ask questions about me like nationality of mom, dad, etc. Well, the questions led to him talking abot himself which is what I wanted. Anyways, I thought I should be asking questions because it shows interest and will help us get closer. I just always feel so akward...I dont know why. Any ideas or simple questions that will help?

 

It is not awkward to ask a question at all. You can make it really cool and casual if asking your question, you relate the question you asked to yourself.

 

For example, you ask, "Did you do anything fun this weekend?" he might answer no or yes and say blah blah blah. Then you relate it to yourself and say, "I had a great weekend blah blah blah. Or I just stayed at home but I got a lot of time to myself and relaxed a bit. It was great. blah blah blah."

 

Another example, "Have you ever gone to another city/traveled to another country/gone camping/ etc.?" He might say, "Yes or no blah blah blah." Then you relate it to yourself by talking about how you went to another city/ traveled to another country/ gone camping, etc..

 

This will be an amazing way to show that you are interested in him because not only do you ask questions about him, you also tell him about you. If you do this, it is completely cool and NOT awkward.