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Hello there,

My name is Jessica and I am getting married in Aug , I am so depressed cuz i dont really think this guy i am getting married to is the right one for me.

we started dating 3 years ago, and after 2 years he proposed me, i said yes ,but now i am not sure what am i doing?

the problem is this, my fiance is so sensitive as he said, anything happens in his life that he does not like it, makes him upset and his reaction to his sadness is getting too quiet, and also he stops talking with me. even though i have nothing to do with that problem but he rather to stop talking to me other than sharing the problem with me so i can help him out. he ignores me the time that he is upset. and it really hurts cuz i have not done anything wrong to make him upset, why should i be ignored?

I broke up with him couple of times but all the time cuz he was so sorry and he cried and begged me to go back, i got back to him and same problem happened.

after couple of times breaking up, and he said he is going to fix his behavior and he actually did get better , he proposed me and i said yes, every thing was fine until i went for Vacation to Hawaii with my single girl friends, over there i met a guy and cuz he was so nice and kind to me I fell in love with him, and he fell in love with me, then i told him i am engaged and he got so sorry, and we said goodbye to each other. since i am back and i have to get ready for my wedding which it is in couple of months,but i am so depressed and i think my fiance is going back to the same person as he was at the beginning of our relationship and on the other hand i still love the guy i met in Hawaii.

now i am postponing my wedding and i am not sure what i am doing is right or wrong. the other guy from Hawaii found me and he proposed me too, now i have 2 guys that are actually available and want to get marry me and i dont know which one is the right one.

help me please


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A guy you met on vacation (which I assume was a few week vacation) fell in love with you and later found you and proposed to you? I would be weary of that. Also I think you should tell your fiance how you feel because leading him on will not do any of you any good. See if you can work out the problems with your fiance first and if not give yourself some time to move on before you accept another marriage proposal and find yourself regretting it on this forum a few months from now.

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Hi Jessica


First off I'm not overly qualified in this dept so I wont say much other than you can't go down the path if you are not happy with it. The pain and suffereing by both families and your fiance if you go through with it and then change your mind and opt for seperation will be far greater than if you call it off before hand.


You are in a tough situation, there is no doubt about it, but being true to yourself and him when you don't feel right about being married is of the utmost most importantance.


If I were you I would temporarily erase the other guy from your mind - yes it has made you more aware of how you feel towards your finace but it will only confuse things further if you jump into a relationship with him which, by the sounds of it, could just be a holiday romance.


I'm sure others will be along shortly with advice.

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You are not ready or mature enough to marry anyone.

You obviously dated that Hawaii guy long enough,and intensely enough for both of you to fall in love with each other. Thats cheatin' honey, even if you did not sleep with him which is highly likely...And it is worse because you did that AFTER you became engaged to your B/f.


DO your B/f a favor and go NC.



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