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I sent the letter, i got this back let me know what you think?


clare.harry

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Hey Everyone

 

I sent my ex a letter saying everything that i felt in it. I told him i understood why we split up and i wished him well and told him there was no hard feelings and that i hoped that one day we could be friends. I said how i didnt regret being with him because we had so many happy memories and that i was thankful for all the things he had taught me about myself!

Background we were together for 2 yrs we have been split for 3 months now he said that he didnt think that he could make me happy anymore and he didnt see a future with the way our relationship was. In other words he wasnt happy anymore!Since then ive kept minimal contact, hes text me a few times saying how much he misses me and how we cant be friends because if he sees me hell want to get back with me ect. I saw him for the first time in 3 months last week and he got really jealous when another bloke showed me some attention. I decided to send him a letter. He text me this back.

Hi Clare, just to say i got your letter yesterday and everytime i read iti havent made it through without crying yet. i hope you go on to better things and hope you know that i stillthink about you a lot we did hav a lot of good times together which i will never forget you taught me things aswell,some of them i am finding out now your gone!now i can reflect about it all aswell!Your Paul

 

I now find myself not knowing what to do, do i text back?This message sounds so final i dont really know what to say. WHat does it mean?????

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isnt he!!!!! i just dont know with him, i suppose actions speak louder than words and he hasnt shown any actions of wanting us to get back together, his actions have only shown jealousy. I dont know whether he just doesnt know what he wants, he doesnt want to get back together but does miss me or whether he does and doesnt want to look stupid by admitting he was wrong.

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I think he probably took your letter as a fond farewell and saw it as 'final'. Instead of that you should have said that you wish that there had been an opportunity to fix things and that if he would like to try you would be open to it.

 

So he responded in kind.

 

When sending letters like this - say exactly what you mean. And what you mean is what you want - not what you think they might want to hear or what you think sounds good.

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you should have said that you wish that there had been an opportunity to fix things and that if he would like to try you would be open to it.

 

You could try saying that as one last ditch attempt if you really want to get back with him but if you don't receive any reply or get a negative response I think its time to accept its over and move on for real.

 

Good Luck with what ever you decide.

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I would only have sent a letter like your first one if I was 100% sure that it was over, wanted to move on, and didn't want to take a load of baggage with me. Judging by his response, that's how Paul read it too - hence the crying.

 

Without knowing anything about the circumstances of your relationship, how it ended and so on - it sounds as though he was protecting himself and has now realised that it didn't work.

 

If you want to patch things up with this guy - move very quickly, and be prepared for rejection. If you feel you can cope with that, then go for it. Otherwise, move on, secure in the knowledge that this really wasn't the right relationship for you.

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I think he probably took your letter as a fond farewell and saw it as 'final'. Instead of that you should have said that you wish that there had been an opportunity to fix things and that if he would like to try you would be open to it.

 

So he responded in kind.

 

When sending letters like this - say exactly what you mean. And what you mean is what you want - not what you think they might want to hear or what you think sounds good.

 

Great advice for women who have a habit of speaking in code.

 

The OPs letter sounded final but affectionate and gentle,and so he responded in a similar way.

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