I really need to know how to stop acting like this.

[mariemariegirl]

I could really use your advice.

 

Ive been dating this guy for a while now, (almost 6 months) and I REALLY REALLY care for him. He's a really nice, kind, loving boyfriend.

 

We bicker a lot though, and the main problem is ME.

 

 

I'm super sensitive and just freak out so easily about the dumbest thing. I can just blow up about the stupidest my pointless things. I'm very insecure and jealous and oversensitive. I will overanalyze things to death.

 

He's tired from work and not super talkative - oh no! the problem must be us!

 

He's not in the mood for sex for a day or two - oh no! Im not pretty anymore!

 

Its like I'm constantly telling him why he's not good enough and why he must not love me. It's so bad.

 

Sometimes I hear myself, and how needy and desperately insecure I sound. AND MEAN I get and am so humiliated later, but during the fight I *feel* so justified that I can't seem to stop myself.

 

 

Can you help me? I'm really damaging us and I really want to stop.

[loft]

What can you do to feel more secure about yourself and to love yourself? That should be your focus at this point if you really feel you're damaging the relationship.

 

Are you ready for the relationship with him? What makes you feel so insecure, jealous, and sensitive?

[yonkeehoi]

Print 2 copies of your post - one for you one for him and invite him to use it as a 'flag' next time.

 

I believe your realization and comment/admission here is the biggest step - good for you.

[freefromu]

hi sweetie, your problem is a common girl's problem, i am like this too. but it can be worked on, not easy, but can be done with effort. you are sensitive because you care about him.

 

so what is his reaction right now towards your sensitivity? is he bothered by it? some guys understand and can take it well, some don't, and if serious, yes it could lead to a break up.

 

so you are very smart to already identify this problem.

 

reading self help book regarding this will help. as to recommendation, i don't have any, but go to borders and browse the book, you will realise some books will open up your mind and even have fun browsing and choosing. but yes, i think we girls have to work on this, you are not alone.

[Mia_of_Doom]

How much time do you spend with him? Do you have any hobbies that you enjoy by yourself or with friends?

 

You're attached to an unhealthy degree and need to let go, or you will drive the poor boy away. Find yourself again and be happy with yourself. Do things you enjoy before you had a boyfriend. When you feel confident and secure in yourself, you'll be happier with the relationship.