Where can you meet girls to date?

[keith515]

Now that I'm single, I need to some ideas on where to meet women.

 

Occasionally, there are speed dating events but they are few and far between, and there is not always an opening.

 

I've never had much luck in clubs or bars.

 

Dating websites seems to be such a numbers game, it takes too much work and energy just to find someone worth dating.

 

But I'm wondering what kind of clubs or organizations I can joint to meet single women between the ages of 25-35.

[Mia_of_Doom]

Well, what do you enjoy doing? If you're an active person, join a gym. If you like caffeine and literature, hang out in bookstores and chat up employees or other customers. If you're an artist, sign up for seminars or sessions at a studio. If you like animals, volunteer at local animal shelters.

 

The possibilities are endless.

[iwishiknew]

don't do online dating, it is a waste of time.

[shy2cool]

I would also like to know....

[Daligal83]

I'm a single 25 year old female. I can tell you that I spend my social time at the gym, walking around outside in those trendy areas with all the shops, I'm hoping to start taking walks in the local park, and for nightlife I really like bars with live music. I also go to bookstores and cafes a good amount. I would LOVE to be approached at any of those places (and it never happens lol).

[trav1234]

in my opinion you can turn anywhere your at into looking for girls to date, i agree with the idea of joining a gym and doing it there, but in all reality you could go to a bar to meet girls and you wont get any unless you are real with them, and have the confidence to MAYBE be rejected a couple time first

[dr_styles]

I'm a single 25 year old female. I can tell you that I spend my social time at the gym, walking around outside in those trendy areas with all the shops, I'm hoping to start taking walks in the local park, and for nightlife I really like bars with live music. I also go to bookstores and cafes a good amount. I would LOVE to be approached at any of those places (and it never happens lol).

 

(You already know this Daligal but to let the keith and everyone else who may not ...)

I'm a guy who is is out regularly doing various things even if they are errands or just exercise or eating, but nothing social regular like with a group of friends or club. In some ways the male version of the above, except for my personal preferences like not into bars or bookstores, haha (and obviously not a girl). The main point being you are down to the cold approach ...

 

Now my personal history (rather lack of) heavily influences this post, so keep an open mind, but it would have to take something pretty damn obvious to get me to cold approach someone. Like today went to the local supermarket slowly strolling the aisles stocking up on me snacks and anything cheap that might be worth getting. It was late-ish weeknight, so pretty empty. As we all know sometimes you'll see that girl who catches your eye (i.e. you think they're pretty) - but like all the other times, you basically don't exist to them.

hehe luckily I'm probably not be the sort of guy daligirl is after

 

My suggestion simply being when people say things like everyday places, or down at the cafe, or down at the bookstore, you need to either have to be proven attractive, like you've gotten plenty of looks/attention from girls (I haven't) or have the skill and personality to go the cold approach. This is just my experience; like I said I've gone out a bit, tried the coffee shop, bar, pub a couple of times, and bulletproof (in another thread) is right - it's not just the place itself but your personality. I (personally) need something where conversation is much more natural, dare I say forced - places like the gym, coffee shop, bars, do not.

[Daligal83]

dr styles...what do you mean luckily you're probably not the type of guy I'd be after?

 

I think in one of your posts dr styles someone mentioned that the activities you do should be social in nature. OP, that could be part of the problem. Cold approaches are very very very hard to do, especially if you lack the confidence to do so. Like for me, I thought this bartender at the place I was at Saturday night was VERY attractive. Normally I can talk up a storm with anyone, but I lost all my words. My friends had to help me out haha. Too bad he had a girlfriend

 

Anyway, it would help to join activities where social interaction is built in. Like volunteering, classes at the gym, other classes in general, etc. That way you don't have to rely on the cold approach too much. You can just bring up something about the class to get the conversation started.

[dr_styles]

I would LOVE to be approached at any of those places (and it never happens lol).

 

it would have to take something pretty damn obvious to get me to cold approach someone.

 

-------

 

dr styles...what do you mean luckily you're probably not the type of guy I'd be after?

 

Cos I'd never come up to you.

[flash83]

ive been doing the online dating thing and its worked out well so far ..

[ghost69]

i walk out the door of the house and look around.

[Daligal83]

-------

 

 

 

Cos I'd never come up to you.

 

 

 

Ahhh well yea that could be an issue cause I'd never come up to you either. I have no guts!! I just assume the guy won't find me attractive and will think I'm ridiculous for even thinking he could be interested. So I stay away

[dr_styles]

Yeah but you've got an excuse being a girl . Not that it means anything because the "standoff" doesn't help anyone. So it's good that I'm not your type, not missing anything

[Daligal83]

Lol we'll you're cute!! I'd definitely be checking you out if I saw you in public. So I can't say you're not my type...just that nothing would probably happen since we're both shy when it comes to those situations lol.

[Bartok]

So I can't say you're not my type...just that nothing would probably happen since we're both shy when it comes to those situations lol.

Such a shame that so many people have been conditioned to behave a certain way, so that they actively avoid things that might actually make them happy.

[Daligal83]

I think maybe I'm self-conditioned to be this way? It's not a whole gender role issue. It's a self-esteem issue.

[Bartok]

I think maybe I'm self-conditioned to be this way? It's not a whole gender role issue. It's a self-esteem issue.

I didn't even have genders in mind when I said that, but I guess it kinda works both ways.

 

I'm just talking about shyness in general - how you were treated when younger directly affects your self-esteem today. I just think it's sad that shy people have effectively been beaten into submission (conditioned), and have to fight SO HARD just to say a single sentence, when it comes effortlessly to most people.

[dr_styles]

Yeah I've pretty much had the whole conditional thing with how I was raised. I keep trying to psych up to start/say something but in the actual situation it just doesn't happen. Everyone always looks so busy, or unwelcoming, and ofcourse as I've been taught I don't want to disturb people. Or when it comes to girls in particular well I just don't exist.

 

So girls are everywhere, but depending how far back you're starting from if you've had this sort of conditioning stuff, you can't just "join a club", "go to a coffee shop", etc.

[Daligal83]

I'm weird though because normally I can chat up anyone. I make friends wherever I go. But if I'm interested in the guy, forget it. My words all disappear. It's so frustrating.

[LAYAAN]

Now that I'm single, I need to some ideas on where to meet women.

Occasionally, there are speed dating events but they are few and far between, and there is not always an opening.

I've never had much luck in clubs or bars.

Dating websites seems to be such a numbers game, it takes too much work and energy just to find someone worth dating.

But I'm wondering what kind of clubs or organizations I can joint to meet single women between the ages of 25-35.

Look for a girl that has varied interests, girly interests LOL.

cooking, gardening, arts n craft, walking groups, marathon, tennis clubs, hiking, travel and adventure groups, volunteering, book clubs/book stores, dog parks, health conscious women at the healthy food section at a good grocery store (tofu, vitamins, proteins, for sure hand-made soaps, fragrances, dark chocolate, wine section, Clarks-Trader Joes, don't go for cheap stores, JCPenney, film festival), spa, salons (I'm not sure if there are special ones for men, sorry, excuse my ignorance), hang around one of those "nails" shop where women come to get their nails done, farmers market, church/temple (look for one that has events for singles), yoga (big time, man). Also, shoe stores (big time). Join meetup today. Lots of single women there. University libraries for sure - considering the age group that you have mentioned. Women in medicine, PhD, pharmacy, dentistry program are easily at least 25-27 yr old. There are majority female students in nursing, dentistry, pharmacy, also fine arts programs. Art galleries (big time), Look for one of those free health clinic fairs (open to all, you don't even have to register, just hang around), these students go there to volunteer and also some go there to get their CE units. Continue online thing, you can cast a wider net that way. I'm not against OLD. Use all resources possible.