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My boyfriend doesn't know he took my virginity...


Lusif

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When I started uni I decided I didn't want to make my usual shy/timid impression, and wanted to be more 'me' - outgoing, happy, fun. I worried people would judge me for being a virgin (because it's such a big thing when you are one!), and that didn't fit in with my 'perfect' impression. So at first I was just mysterious about my sexual past, but then 'told' people I'd slept with two guys (I'd gone 95% of the way with two guys).

 

I was just friends with my boyfriend at first, then we developed a spark, and eventually slept together after a few months. Back then, I didn't want a relationship - it was just fun, so I didn't feel the need to tell him the truth. But yup, we ended up falling in love and we've been together two months now.

 

But he doesn't know he was my first.

 

Would telling him do more harm than good? I just feel a bit uncomfortable knowing I lied to him. Plus, there are other people I lied to who I'd have to explain to! It's in the past.

 

I don't know whether to wait a while, then maybe one day when we're more committed it might come up?

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i do not think it would harm you both if you two are in love.

 

my bf of over 1.5 years actually TOLD me he used to be a virgin before we got together when we were together for 7 months. i had never asked him if he was or wasn't. but i did know that he was one. it did not bother me one bit.

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The idea of virginity is only a big deal when you're really young and haven't had sex... it's amazing how quickly it becomes a non-issue once you're having sex. It's like riding a bike for the first time, or learning how to dance. Once you've learned/done it/know how, the anxiety/hubbub about it loses significance.

 

So just happily keep dancing so to speak, and don't worry about it... what is really your motivation for telling him now anyway? Nobody needs to go into any great detail about their sexual history if they are free of STDs, so really it is only your business and not anyone else's.

 

You could tell him in future if the subject comes up again, but i wouldn't make a big deal of it.

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agree with last post - its only big to you as its new you , id let i lye for the time being if it crops up , say you thought you had had sex before but it was only when i was with you i truly felt id lost my virginity ........ imagine hes ego then!!!

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