How do I know if the guy I like is gay?

[ouran]

Hi. Im new here. And im...well im gay.I basically made this topic because theres a boy I like in my grade and I dont know if hes gay/bi/straight, or whatever. Ive been friends with this boy for a while, since elementry school. But we used to hang out alot more then we do now. And every time we did hang out it was usually with alot of people. I really like him though. And hes done lots of things that make me think he likes me to, but then he does things that make me think the opposite. Ill just say some of the stuff he did. But before that you have to understand this boy. He is like...the funniest kid youll ever meet. Hes not shy in the least or anything like that. And some of the things he did i dont know if he was trying to be funny or not... well hes in my computer class and I sat kind of close to him, not to close but not that far. And he would always try to make me laugh while the teacher is trying to teach us something. And one time...er well he grabbed one of his balls through his shorts once =_=. but like I said thats something he would do lmao. I dont know if he was trying to be funny or if he was trying to like..flirt or something...idk. But yea he always tries to make me laugh. And I always do xD. Im kind of shy around him, but its not that bad. He used to grab my ass when we used to hang out alot but not recently. And at a sleep over last summer it was me, him, and 3 other guys. and idk we were just fooling around being goofs and someone tackled the kid i like and i think i smacked his ass and he was like "*laughing* keep doing that it feels good" I diddnt know what to get out of that.... And there was lots of stuff like that thats happened through the years. And at another sleep over last summer it was the same people. We set up a tent in the backyard. (i know lame, but it was fun) and we diddnt goto sleep though. We basically just had fun, mostly innocent stuff >_>. But we diddnt goto sleep. And at like 6 when the sun started coming up i was like im so tired. And he was like yea me to I need some sleep. And there was a blanket set out on the ground and he said "Yo I dont wanna sleep alone the others will do something to me" or something along those lines. So we both slept under this blanket and idk.... But his recent activity is making me think hes not interested. Although my b-day was the other day and he rememberd it and that made me really happy. But I keep texting him to hang out and im assuming hes ignoring them. Over spring vacation (it started last week and is ending in a couple days) I texted him like 3 times asking to hang out and I never got a responce. So today I texted him "If you dont wanna hang out just say so lol" And he texted back saying he was at a baseball game the entire day so thats why he diddnt respond. (Doesnt explain the other times) So I said something like "O ok np. Do you wanna hang out tomorow? My mom said a couple people can sleep over" And he said he had a game. (he plays sports, im not gonna say wat sport tho lol) And maybe he was telling the truth...or not idk. But before the vacation, the friday before vacation started I asked him to hang out and he said he was going away for a couple days and that turned out to be true, cause I asked my friend. I dont know what to do anymore. I feel like I should give up. Do you think he likes me? Do you think hes gay or straight? I need answers =_=. Oh also he has never had any girlfriends. (makes no sense to me cause hes really cute and all the girls like him)

 

...help

 

edit: OOPS! I put this in the wrong section...can a mod please move it to the gay/bi section.

[jengh]

I don't know... if he was into you, I think he'd be more responsive to your texts and advancements (i.e., asking him to sleep over and all that). From the bit that I gathered, he's probably straight..at the most bi-curious. Or, he's still just really young (as are you) and unsure of his sexuality. It seems like in the past he was just testing the waters a bit, some harmless experimenting. I wouldn't try to pursue this any further. I know you like him, but he's not being very receptive. Just be his friend for now.

 

Blue Streak, I'm having a hard time trying to figure out why you're challenging him. Everyone here starts out new. We have to take them at face value and assume they're telling the truth. I knew several people in high school who were totally "out" and very aware of their sexuality. Just because he's young doesn't mean he's automatically clueless to what he wants. And another thing, this is an anonymous forum. I don't think he needs to "prove" his identity. If you're so worried about him being a troll (which I honestly don't feel he is), just don't respond (I mean that in the most respectful way possible).

[arwen]

Moderator note members who sign on to ENA declare they are 13 or older, and from there on they are free to choose to keep their age to themselves.

 

Please don't ask people to disclose this kind of private information, and use the report function if you feel a thread is suspicious for some reason.

 

The posts requesting details or suggesting certain motives of the OP have been have been removed, please stay on topic!

[arwen]

Hey ouran,

 

I moved your topic to the gay section.

 

It seems to me that your friend may be testing the waters, but could also be unsure yet about his sexual feelings/orientation. He could also be joking around. I think that if he were really into you, he would be more flirtatious.

 

I agree with IlovemybabyCairo that you should probably be friends (at least as long as he shows no clear further interest).

[ouran]

I was afraid of that =_=. Well this really sucks.... Thanks guys. He has really religious parents and i was thinking he was kind of avoiding me cause he diddnt want it to get out and then reach his parents...but im probably wrong. Im to optimistic..

[arwen]

Well, his religious family could of course be a factor in how easy he would be able to deal with homosexuality. But at this point, you are not even sure he IS gay. So before you get your hopes up, do you think it is at all possible to stay friends with him and find out if he is gay? Does he know you are?