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Do you think its possible to have chemistry with someone when you have never met in person?

indierockgrl

By indierockgrl
in Dating Advice

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indierockgrl Apprentice

indierockgrl

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I was wondering what you guys thought....

 

i met someone online that i am seriously crushing on....

 

we talk on the phone and online.... but we havent met in person....

 

is it possible to have chemistry or am i creating a fantasy that may end up disappointing me?

 

Thanks guys!!!

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tulipsfav Enthusiast

tulipsfav

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This is a tricky one. I met a guy online before i met my ex. We got on really well, could chat for hours on the phone and online. He made the first move in suggesting meeting up, said the suspense was killing him lol, because we got on so well. We met up had a good chat, i was attracted to him, but not sure if he felt the same. Though would you be happy to kiss someone you werent attracted to? We are still in contact as friends, I do think we will meet up again and see if the chemisty is there. Said that i had a great personality. Red flag in my eyes.

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pinkrobot Collaborator

pinkrobot

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Possible? Absolutely.

 

However, without meeting them you're also missing out on things such as the triggering of pheromones (which naturally attract you to other humans). So it's not the WHOLE experience of having chemistry with another person, but it's not like you can't have any at all without meeting them.

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g84 Enthusiast

g84

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I think it could be possible. This is a bit different, but a friend of mine met someone online, and they became very good friends. They eventually met in person (it turned out that he lives in the same city as us), and when they met with eachother she told me that it was really cool and they felt very comfortable with eachother very quickly. I think that these things could happen with romantic relationships, but i guess there is always a risk of getting carried away with our imaginations as well. I think it's possible, but best to be careful!

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indierockgrl Apprentice

indierockgrl

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Possible? Absolutely.

 

However, without meeting them you're also missing out on things such as the triggering of pheromones (which naturally attract you to other humans). So it's not the WHOLE experience of having chemistry with another person, but it's not like you can't have any at all without meeting them.

 

I know.... dying for the phermones...

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musicguy Mentor

musicguy

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you can connect with someone online, but you have to meet up with them to see if it works (as many have mentioned here) There are some things missing when you talk to someone over the phone or online. What they do in certain situations? How they react to certain situations. How they physically react to you, etc.

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indierockgrl Apprentice

indierockgrl

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it's def possible, but u won't know how u truly feel about that person until you actually physically meet him. Physical chemistry is very important and u haven't established that yet. Do you guys plan on meeting sometime soon?

 

I think it will be this summer sometime. he lives a bit far from me so right now its long distance. that works for me at the moment though...... i just want to look in his eyes

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indierockgrl Apprentice

indierockgrl

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Have you seen pics of him????

 

i have seen pics. we have exchanged photos..... i am the kind of girl that doesnt really judge how a person looks for the most part, because i am really into how a person makes me laugh and how we get on. I know that chemistry is important, i just wouldnt not talk to him or see him if he didnt look that good in a photo.

 

i do, however, thinks he looks good...

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tulipsfav Enthusiast

tulipsfav

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I'm not sure I understand this - can you explain a bit more?

 

Hi, yeah think the fact that i was attracted to him, and i do think there was a certain amount of attraction on his part(seemed to get a good response while we kissed).But when a guy says you have a great personality, i feel that usually means that they are not necessarily attracted to you. Hope this makes sense.

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HouseOfCards Contributor

HouseOfCards

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While it's not the most common way to meet a person, I definitely think establishing a personal/intellectual connection with a person before that first date is kind of an effective way to break the ice. On that first date, the excitement is still there, but maybe not so much nervousness or hesitation. As long as you're both who you say you are to each other, I don't see a problem with it.

 

EXAMPLE: Last spring I started talking to a girl online, and there was a definite attraction between us as far as personality and intellect went, so after a month or so we decided to meet up. As of this week, we have officially been dating for 6 months. \m/ HAPPY ENDING \m/

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Clarity Enthusiast

Clarity

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Based on my experience, it *could* be an indication of real-life chemistry, but it's probably not.

 

Some girls I've met online, I really clicked with in messages and on the phone, but in-person we did not jive nearly as well. However, others did turn out well.

 

Just meet up - the key is to have reasonable (read: low) expectations.

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l0vel0rn Newbie

l0vel0rn

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Yes and no. Attraction is a multifaceted thing. It’s not one dimensional even though it tends to be when we’re younger and less mature. Ultimately though, it comes down to meeting the person and seeing if the “chemistry” you think you have online or on the phone can translate into real world chemistry when you meet. The reality of it is that it doesn’t always. It may not be there because you simply do not find the person attractive once you meet them. It may be that you had a totally different picture of who they were. It may be that the spark just fizzles. Perhaps the person clams up once you meet and that charming personality they had when you were chatting is now AWOL. I find it is best not to get your hopes up too much about someone until you’ve had a chance to actually hang out with them in person. Then you can get a feel for whether or not they are really interested in you and whether or not you are still feeling it for them.

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rocio Veteran

rocio

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No. If you've never met, then it's impossible to have true chemistry.

 

They can be important to you, can make you feel good, can inspire you. But it's entirely possible that there will be no chemistry when you meet. There is only one way to tell.

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