ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Guys, if a girl you would consider "out of your league" were to make a move to ask you out or get to know you, would you run away because she is "out of your league", or would you actually respond, even if you feel like "why is SHE asking ME out?" I just really want to know... Link to comment
Sadly Mistaken Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Its a pretty superficial way to think really. To base a persons worth purely on superficial beauty is wrong. Chances are if a guy is asked out by a women he feels is "out of his league" than he'll always feel inferior to her. Not healthy in a relationship. Maybe i'm taking to serious a view on the question, and i'm not picking on you ScorpiaGal83 but i would hope people grow out of judging a persons worth purely on looks. Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 Thanks, SM... I know, I also hate the fact that people judge you on looks - they make decisions about how smart you are, how worthy, etc, based on how you look. But the truth is, beauty is also subjective. Boy A might feel intimidated by Girl X while Boy B may not because their standards of beauty may differ... so i'm just trying to find out what guys would think about a girl they'd personally deem as being "out of their league" looks-wise, if she were to make a move / first move. Link to comment
heatspreader Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 To be honest since I'm just a negative person sometimes, I'd probably think she was messing with me. I barely ever get approached by any girl let alone one who is really beautiful. I wouldn't run away, I would just be skeptical at first. But I would be like that if any girl asked me out, simply because it just doesn't happen to me. Link to comment
purpleduckie Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 while i also find that it is very superficial to think that way... it is also very common way of thinking so there's nothing wrong with asking the question. League could be indicative of looks, but also intelligence, accomplishments, etc... so it doesn't HAVE to be superficial. i'm not a guy but just wanted to put it out there! hah. for the answer, i think they all would be ecstatic and would say yes as long as they were attracted to said person, unless they have some sort of self-esteem issue. Link to comment
dr_styles Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Got someone in mind ScorpiGal? would you run away because she is "out of your league", or would you actually respond, even if you feel like "why is SHE asking ME out?" Well as one of the prime examples of such a guy, I wouldn't run away and hell yeah I'd want to respond "properly". But realistically I would probably be a little shell-shocked (yes, "why is SHE ...") and probably shoot myself in the foot and look like the shy-nervous little boy I can't seem to shake. Haha hopefully she's not put off and something happens. (damn, if only it wasn't all just a fantasy ](*,)) To be honest since I'm just a negative person sometimes, I'd probably think she was messing with me. I barely ever get approached by any girl let alone one who is really beautiful. I wouldn't run away, I would just be skeptical at first. But I would be like that if any girl asked me out, simply because it just doesn't happen to me. Yeah that'd be a big part of it for me too; any girl. It just doesn't happen to me. Link to comment
CaseOfInsanity Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Maybe see the movie Shallow Hal? Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 See that's the thing though - girls asking guys out isn't all that common, but I'm the kind of girl that if I saw a guy I liked and felt comfortable doing it, I'd just do it... ..then I get my friends telling me "no, you'll scare him off" or "guys like to be in control so they prefer to do the asking" and yada yada.. WHY do we have to play these GAMES? Why can't we just do what we want, in a sense, if it doesn't hurt anyone? Ok back to the topic at hand, I like this guy, I think he's cute but my taste in men hasn't always impressed my friends (but I don't really care what they think and I go ahead anyway), but the reason I'm asking this question is not because I think I'm super hot or too good for him or anything like that, it's just I'm worried that HE might feel that way and not respond and leave me in the lurch... ..do u guys get what I mean...? Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 Maybe see the movie Shallow Hal? Hahaha... yeahhh.. but... it's a MOVIE and Hal is an arsehole! Link to comment
DaBladeRoden Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 I'd think that there has to be catch. If it's not immediately apparent, then there has to be an even bigger one hidden deep down. Link to comment
Sn0man Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Without basing anything on looks, if a girl that was 'hypotheticaly' out of my league approached me, I would take my chances with her. But i'm not a guy who believes that anyone is out of my league so I can't really relate to someone who does. Link to comment
Sn0man Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 I'd think that there has to be catch. If it's not immediately apparent, then there has to be an even bigger one hidden deep down. Why? Thinking that someone is out of your league is simply a matter of personal perception. Perceptions can often be quite wrong. Link to comment
DeviousOne Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Depends on the guy. What would a guy think if a girl that he thought was "out of his league" talked to him and approached him? One things that comes to mind I would think would be this girl has something (std) or something is wrong with her but alot of guys especially when approached by an attractive female think with the other head and logical and rational thinking go out the window. Personally i dont see things like that leagues or base looks after the intial attraction because lets be honest if you (guys and girl) aren't attracted to looks at first then nothing would happen something has to intalially attract boy x to girl a or whatever. Its not like guys are girls go out saying I see his personallity or his heart and i want to go talk to him. Looks are 95% of the time the first intial attraction especially if you are both strangers to each other. A relationship wont work if it never moves past the looks attraction you can't base a lasting relationship on that alone and alot of people try to by giving exceptions and not sticking to their standards...F that Link to comment
d24 Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 to answer the original question, it depends on how 'out of my league' the girl was. Not matter what people should do or want to think, physical beauty can be very intimidating. So it relies completely on a case by case on whether the guy is confident enough to deal with it. If we're talking Scarlett Johansson to my Quasimodo then I'd feel extremely uncomfortable doing anything, and I'd worry that she wasn't serious. If we're talking about a real 'head turner' and i'm reasonably secure in myself, then yes I'd be happy to oblige her and take her out. Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 Thanks guys, good answers, varied but that's what I wanted to see... Anyways I did ask the guy out and he told me he's very busy with work this week ("it's a crazy week") but next week should be good, "i guess." thought on that response? this is really the first time i've come right out and asked a guy just like that. a guy i barely know. actually, there's some info here from a previous thread i started about my situation: I did a bit of a lame thing and asked him via text because I just couldn't bring myself to call him on the phone, and I rarely see him in person (if i do there are lots of other ppl around and it's not appropriate). My text read: "Hi M.A.S, it's ScorpiGal. Are you free for coffee after work sometime?" What do you think? Bad move..? Link to comment
DeviousOne Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Doesnt sound bad....I think that was a good way to approach it. Coffee in the daytime is a very low pressure chilling setting good for conversation cause there wont be many distractions.. I've had girl approach me this way im a text'ster myself so usually thats how i communicate with friends and people i meet since im usually running around. Link to comment
DeviousOne Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Just read your orignal post....Basically all i can say is to not rush into anything with this new guy. if your still thinking and considering being with your ex keep it causal with this guy cause it wont be fair to him. Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 Just read your orignal post....Basically all i can say is to not rush into anything with this new guy. if your still thinking and considering being with your ex keep it causal with this guy cause it wont be fair to him. Oh, I'm totally over my ex, not attracted to him anymore, especially not sexually. Link to comment
ScorpiGal83 Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 Doesnt sound bad....I think that was a good way to approach it. Coffee in the daytime is a very low pressure chilling setting good for conversation cause there wont be many distractions.. I've had girl approach me this way im a text'ster myself so usually thats how i communicate with friends and people i meet since im usually running around. Ooohhh.. what happened? what did u think when u got her invitation by text? Link to comment
DeviousOne Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 It went cool she ahd invited me out to downtown orlando for a walk around downtown we had a good time good conversation really got a great sense of the kinda person she was it also opened out plans to hang out that night. When i got it i thought cool she wants to hang out there was a level of attraction there as far as flirting and all that so it was nice of her to text me. it was a very low pressure very chill situation usually thats how i like to spend time with someone im just getting to know i call them day dates...LOL its a great way to feel someone out and get to know them cause at night some people are not different but are more prone to do things they wouldnt do during the day mostly im reffering to having drinks (i know i am especially after a long week at work) nothing wrong with that as long as you can keep your composure. I think it was a good move if he doesn't reply dont push for it or ask again you dont want to come off desprate and needy.... Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Any man responding that they'd be shocked or run away needs to get some confidence. Are you serious?? What makes you think that ANYONE is out of your "league"? So basically you're not good enough for some girls and you just settle for others? Lame. Link to comment
servedcold Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Some threads here contain opinions that state that all men go after only the hottest women, regardless of their own level of attractiveness. So if you believe that (I don't btw) there would never be an issue with men feeling "out of their league." I think most people with a secure self-image will accept attention from anyone. I think many women out there are still waiting for Brad Pitt to pull up in their driveway one day, and that if most men had a chance to take out a Victoria's Secret model that they would jump at the chance. Best wishes with this guy, try to put the "out of his league" thinking out of your head though. People can sense when they are being condescended to. Try not to have an attitude of "I'm doing this guy a favor even paying him any attention" and you should be fine. Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 When I met my SO, he thought I was out of his league..it wasn't until I got his number and flirted with him..that he started to pursue me. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 i have no problem with it. oh wait, no such things as leagues except in sports. Link to comment
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