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Im Frustrated With My Mum


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My mum is over weight (110kgs) and has been since i can remember, she is very lazy and doesnt seem to care about her weight. About 2 months ago she had a high blood pressure and i forced her to go on walks and to cook/eat healthy and i managed to get her blood pressure down. She kept going but for some reason didnt loose any weight.


Part of her problem is my dad cooks mostly and does not know how to cook healthy (frys everything,etc) and even more frustrating he doesnt want to learn how to, when i got her blood pressure down i had to make sure she cooked. My final straw was when one night my dad cooked steak and fried chips, and i asked her if she had any chips and she got really defensive and told me off that she only had a little bit of chips. I have been trying to get her to go to a dietician but she wont go because she thinks they will make her only eat salad, and today when i told her if she doesnt do something soon she could die soon and im worried, she told me she doesnt care.


Im just frustrated and could use some advice on what to do. I feel so helpless because there is nothing i can do to stop this, only she can.

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hi - i would really recommend she go to weight watchers or another program like that. let me assure you, you don't eat only salad! you learn how to eat the foods you love, but in moderation, and to have a healthy life style. i think it's great that you care about her and keeping her healthy. i would sit her down and just tell her that you really care about her and love her, that you want her to be healthy enough to be able to chase after your children in a few years and you want her to live long enough for her to see them grow up and have their own families!


maybe take some family cooking classes? i have a george foreman grill, it makes really good meat, grilled, not fried! and juicy!


weight watchers is a great program, she will have a lot of support there from other people who have been in her shoes.

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I know that you are understandably concerned about your mother, but sometimes you can help best by being supportive. Your heart is so in the right place and so you just need to figure out the best strategy to help her out. At this point, it would probably be most helpful to genuinely compliment her on the successes she has, instead of reminding her of the times where she may have slipped. I think it is also important that you realize that this is going to need to be a lifestyle change for her and that it is not going to happen overnight. You have told her your concerns and now you just have to support her and the decisions she makes. I understand that you have some good suggestions on how she can start making strides in the right direction, but she also has to sign up and want to move in that direction. I don't think you can force her, but you can definitely support her and allow her to decide when and how to address the issue. Just remember that this transformation will happen after she agrees it is necessary and it will also happen one step at a time. I actually just wrote a blog with a similar alternaview tonight. You can check it out if you have time. It talks about how everything proceeds one step at a time.


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My childhood friend's parents were like that. They eventually died relatively early. High triglycerides, cholesterol, and fat will lead to possible death or life changes due to: stroke, diabetes, and/or heart attack.


In my friend's dad's case, his dad got a stroke at a real early age. He didn't make any diet changes or exercise much, and suffered through undiagnosed diabetes for a few years. Eventually, his health went downhill fast and he died from more strokes and cardiac arrest.


They ate awful all their lives. Fried foods and lots of sugary sodas.

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