justheretotalk Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 I love my wife dearly, but our sex life has dwindled in the last few years from 3-4 times week to maybe once per week or even 2 times per month. We are both in our upper thirties, but I am still as horny as an 18yo and she isn't. I don't want to hurt her, but a man has needs right? I've heard that women taper off between 25-40 and then get aggressive again after 40+, am I foolish to think that things will go back to the way they were? Anyone got some advice? Link to comment
justheretotalk Posted April 14, 2009 Author Share Posted April 14, 2009 I love my wife dearly, but our sex life has dwindled in the last few years from 3-4 times week to maybe once per week or even 2 times per month. We are both in our upper thirties, but I am still as horny as an 18yo and she isn't. I don't want to hurt her, but a man has needs right? I've heard that women taper off between 25-40 and then get aggressive again after 40+, am I foolish to think that things will go back to the way they were? Anyone got some advice? Link to comment
metrogirl Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Is she under any kind of stress at the moment? Does she work a lot and are there children involved? That can drain the life out of a woman. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Is she under any kind of stress at the moment? Does she work a lot and are there children involved? That can drain the life out of a woman. Link to comment
free2Bme Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Have you two spoken about this? If it's just that she's not horny then maybe you can do thinge to entice her, you know, spice things up a bit to get her in the mood. Link to comment
free2Bme Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Have you two spoken about this? If it's just that she's not horny then maybe you can do thinge to entice her, you know, spice things up a bit to get her in the mood. Link to comment
Tethys Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Do you have kids? That's no excuse, i am just asking. Link to comment
Tethys Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Do you have kids? That's no excuse, i am just asking. Link to comment
girl68 Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 I guess over time the frequency of sex always goes down. But that just means you both have to work harder to maintain a satisfactory level of frequency! Do try to spice things up. Do plan a romantic evening at home or out and wine and dine her so to speak. Do try to relieve her of some stress. Do have a talk with her about what you can do and suggest things that she can do as well. Hopefully she's just as itnerested in having more sex with you! Link to comment
justheretotalk Posted April 14, 2009 Author Share Posted April 14, 2009 We are a mixed family, I have two younger kids that only live with us part time and hers are grown 19-21. She has plenty of stress from hers and mine to some extent, so I'm hoping that this is all it is, not that that isnt enough. I do most the domestic stuff, cooking, cleaning, shopping etc, so I am doing my part to reduce stress, but we do both also work full time jobs. I guess why it bothered me so much is we used to go at it like rabbits and now it seems to not matter to her at all whether or not we do it or how often. Thanks for all your repsonses Link to comment
purpleduckie Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 are there flirtation, seduction going on still? Link to comment
girl68 Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 Well then talk to her... perhaps she thinks it got boring? Link to comment
justheretotalk Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 We still flirt and kiss and hug out of the bedroom, but it's mostly all initiated by me, it gets tiring after awhile of always being the one to grab a kiss or a hug Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 I love my wife dearly, but our sex life has dwindled in the last few years from 3-4 times week to maybe once per week or even 2 times per month. We are both in our upper thirties, but I am still as horny as an 18yo and she isn't. I don't want to hurt her, but a man has needs right? I've heard that women taper off between 25-40 and then get aggressive again after 40+, am I foolish to think that things will go back to the way they were? Anyone got some advice? Do you have kids? Link to comment
Eire1 Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Welcome to married life. I have experienced exactly the same thing. We tried to turn our sexual relationship around, but like you said, I tended to see that I was the only one making the effort and taking any initiative. At some point sex stopped becoming fun for me, because of her overall attitude. Once you begin to realize it's only happening because you are trying desperately to keep it alive, then eventually your own interest wanes. At the end of the day, both partners want to feel sexually desired. You can't help, but to take it personal. Come to think of it, that's probably why I've grown more interested in watching porn themes depicting sexually starved and desperate women. LOL It's like the complete opposite of what has become my reality. Sometimes you just need to be reminded that women have a sexual pulse still. Link to comment
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