Girls: Cold Shouldering a Friend

[Mandoro]

Im trying real hard to legitimize the treatment Ive just received, but its getting pretty hard to do. Ive been given the big fat cold shoulder by a female friend of mine. I asked her whats wrong and shes says nothing. Obviously there is, but she wont tell me.

 

I respect the whole you dont want to tell me thing, but in my mind if I did nothing wrong I shouldnt be getting a cold shoulder. We should be hanging out and having fun, but no.

 

Im trying to legitimize it by thinking maybe there is something else going on in her life and she just needs to think, but its tough. I feel like Ive been disrespected. Thats why Im here, to calm down and think clearly. I want to call her so bad and ask why I got such treatment, but I think that would do more harm then good. What should I do? I really dont know...

[DJBaby]

Really? You have no idea at all why she's angry with you? Really? You must have some clue...

[Mandoro]

Im being 100% honest when I say I have nooooooo idea what I did wrong. The last time we hung out we were doing great. We were all together having a good time, no negative moments at all.

[DJBaby]

I don't think, then, that there's any real constructive advice anyone can give you... except that it might be a good idea to back off and let her figure out she's being ridiculous.

[second_opinion]

I rkon you should pull back, just let her be, she'l probably come to you when shes ready.

[COtuner]

Can you think of anything you might have done that would have rubbed her wrong? A lot of us are oblivious to how others around us might feel. We tend to assess situations based on how we would feel, and others would not feel the same in similar circumstances.

 

I'm giving the cold shoulder to someone who doesn't have a clue right now but it's mainly because I'm fed up with his lack of discretion, poor attitude, immaturity and negative mindset. I actually was asked to work with this guy to help change his attitude to help save his job, which I did (and no I am not a shrink or a counselor - just an experienced functional manager and mentor)... but he sank back into the habits pretty quickly. Watching him gleefully gloating when someone was laid off the other day was the last straw for me and I've simply cut him off. Eventually I'll explain to him, but I think it will take him a while to even figure out that he's been cut off - he's oblivious.