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My ex girlfriend is a jerk to me now


Cadestaker
How to leave an abusive relationshi...
How to leave an abusive relationship and why it's so hard

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Hey, thanks for taking time to come to my thread. I am not sure where else to go, because I've been everywhere with my friends and family.

 

Well my girlfriend's name is Katie. She was 14 when we dated, I was 15. She turned 15 about a week before she dumped me.

 

Well our relationship in a nutshell was terrible. I joked about it and told my friends (while dating her) "You know, it's ironic that I'm dating the very type of person I despise the most, isn't it?" We got along fairly fine but there are some things I hate in women- she had every last one of them. She was an overly-social girl who was immature and only cared about her friends, and always did random things thinking it made her cute.

 

We fought even as pre-relationship friends over vital things. She was always the drama queen, telling me stories how of broken and lost she was and how she didn't know who she was and all this bull before and after we got together. Then things started going good, woo. Then we started fighting daily for 4 months, boo.

 

It got to the point to where I was so god da*mn sick of her being un-affectionate. I'd write her twelve page love letters, she'd just reply "Aww.. She never did anything nice or loving for me. She always complained how needy and clingy I was. So I fought with her for a few weeks on it and then eventually she said she feels broken and doesn't know anything. She fell out of love with me. We picked it back up for her birthday (got her an amazing gift, really expensive and thoughtful) and then the next saturday I finally got her to let me come over and a lot of crap happened.

 

For the first time we fought in person..it was terrible. I don't even remember what triggered it..Oh yeah, I mentioned how I'd like her to be a little more touchy or loving in person. She never even hugged or kissed me which was a first. Then she started complaining about how I always say she is under loving, then I complained back saying "Well I wouldn't have to if you'd just make some improvement but you never have."

 

Then she complained because I made a comment about her guy friend looking like a homo, then again because we were disuccsing her best friend-girl's sexual relationship with this guy and I said "Well I would assume they keep having sex if they already did once right?" Stupid things.

 

Then it ended with her doing the one thing I am most sensitive to; going behind my back. We were playing rock band 2 with her family and she was texting. Prior to that she was with her best friend-girl and we read them together since we were concerned but she wouldn't let me see these so I was kinda thinking something was up. She kept making sure I didn't see until she sat her cell down and I looked at it. She was texting one of her guy friends that I absolutely hate, saying how horrrible I am and all this crap. So I called her out on it and she turned it around on me for looking through her phone. Then we got into a huge fight and I asked if she wanted to be with me and she said No. She then broke up with me, explaining, "Don't worry hun it's not forever, I'll come back, I'm never letting go, I just need time alone to re-balance my life and stuff." So I cried into her shoulder and walked home.

 

And after that for the next few days she was really loving like I always wanted her to be so I was back. So we kept that going, then she complained about me talking to her and saying that I had not moved on and that I still think we're dating, so what the hell is up with that.

 

So I called my mom and we decided to break off the possibility of friendship and ever getting back together, and a NC deal. It worked out great and I ignored her for a few weeks. Then I decided to talk to her again since she constantly asked when I would cut off the NC. Everything was good but guess what? We had a fight, again. This time she was mad at me for being so serious and mature and saying I was boring. Then that led to our relationship and her saying how horrible I was to her and how much crap I put her through. Then after that, I found myself still in love with her so I told her and told her I wanted to do NC again until she was dead to me, so we did that.

 

Then two days ago I came out of the NC thing which lasted a few weeks and she was the biggest jerk to me. Her response to everything was "Whatever. I don't f-ing care. I don't give a crap. Good for you, I don't f-ing care." acting as though it was a cirme talking to eachother and that I was a convict. So since she always had been doing this as friends, I got fed up, and wrote a three page letter to her- I made it the meanest I possibly could. I insulted everything from her looks, to her family, religion, how terrible she was, anything to break her. I hated her. She left me, then lied about coming back, then played me, then treated me like garbage. Did I mention the day I came out of the NC deal to cut off feelings for her, her grandpa died the morning before. So I said "Sorry, I'm just trying to cheer you up, I know it must be hard" then she replied "I don't really care what you do, I have a guy who keeps a smile on my face better than you ever could" Haha, again with the jealousy tactics. So I just stopped talking.

 

Anyways, I never sent the letter, I waited a few days to see if she'd apologize..nothing. So I made a new one which didn't insult anything personally but calling her a heartless cow and things of that matter. I was about to sent it but I asked her, "Hey. I have something I need to send to you and then I never want to talk to you ever again. Where's the best place for you, so that you can read it tonight?" And all she said was "Like I care." that's always how she's f-in been. I was so sick of it by now that I let it out on her partially through texting and she did the same, calling me names even before I did her. So eventually I called her the b word, told her to close her legs and shut the f word (this forum censors.) up and wait for my letter. Haha, that was amusing. So I sent it and her boyfriend got on my case so I got my friend on hers, drama llama night. At any rate, I said some mean stuff in there. She actedl ike it didn't hurt her at all but I know it did. No girl likes to be made fun of for looking like a man, called fat, etc. I knew all of her in secure points and I exploited them because dammit she deserved some recoil for putting me through so much crap.

 

Anyway so that's the story. She fell out of love with me, played my feelings, and treated me like crap as a friend even though I still loved her. So I tried to break her and start a huge fight to permanantly NC and to kill my feelings for her. I'm getting a restraining order on her and her boyfriend today to further the NC deal [aside from already blocking her and her friends and bf on every thing possible] and I can say for 100% I hate her and would smile if she died. So everything's good now but...

 

Did I truly have justification for what I sent to her? She started it all, dragged her boyfriend (who is 18, lives way far away in another state, and they date over halo...haha that's the best her fugly ass can get I guess) on me, and treated me like crap from day one.

 

 

Anyways, I'm just trying to move on and find someone new as I have been for the past month. I moved recently and know no one in my area, and I got to on online highschool, and I don't go to church, so I just go out every day for a few hours and walk around, go to stores etc in hopes of opening an oppertunity to meet a new girl or friend, and go from there, still no luck. I am not cocky, but I know I am good looking because all the girls say I am, and I know for a fact I am extremely affectionate and nice in relationships. So I don't have a problem getting a girl, the problem is finding.

 

 

Thanks for reading my big wall of text. It's very un-organized with no specific objective in mind except just for someone to listen and give feedback.

 

My main questions are about my letter I sent, how to heal after all of this, and move on to someone new. Etc.

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Hey, thanks for taking time to come to my thread. I am not sure where else to go, because I've been everywhere with my friends and family.

 

Well my girlfriend's name is Katie. She was 14 when we dated, I was 15. She turned 15 about a week before she dumped me.

 

Well our relationship in a nutshell was terrible. I joked about it and told my friends (while dating her) "You know, it's ironic that I'm dating the very type of person I despise the most, isn't it?" We got along fairly fine but there are some things I hate in women- she had every last one of them. She was an overly-social girl who was immature and only cared about her friends, and always did random things thinking it made her cute.

 

We fought even as pre-relationship friends over vital things. She was always the drama queen, telling me stories how of broken and lost she was and how she didn't know who she was and all this bull before and after we got together. Then things started going good, woo. Then we started fighting daily for 4 months, boo.

 

It got to the point to where I was so god da*mn sick of her being un-affectionate. I'd write her twelve page love letters, she'd just reply "Aww.. She never did anything nice or loving for me. She always complained how needy and clingy I was. So I fought with her for a few weeks on it and then eventually she said she feels broken and doesn't know anything. She fell out of love with me. We picked it back up for her birthday (got her an amazing gift, really expensive and thoughtful) and then the next saturday I finally got her to let me come over and a lot of crap happened.

 

For the first time we fought in person..it was terrible. I don't even remember what triggered it..Oh yeah, I mentioned how I'd like her to be a little more touchy or loving in person. She never even hugged or kissed me which was a first. Then she started complaining about how I always say she is under loving, then I complained back saying "Well I wouldn't have to if you'd just make some improvement but you never have."

 

Then she complained because I made a comment about her guy friend looking like a homo, then again because we were disuccsing her best friend-girl's sexual relationship with this guy and I said "Well I would assume they keep having sex if they already did once right?" Stupid things.

 

Then it ended with her doing the one thing I am most sensitive to; going behind my back. We were playing rock band 2 with her family and she was texting. Prior to that she was with her best friend-girl and we read them together since we were concerned but she wouldn't let me see these so I was kinda thinking something was up. She kept making sure I didn't see until she sat her cell down and I looked at it. She was texting one of her guy friends that I absolutely hate, saying how horrrible I am and all this crap. So I called her out on it and she turned it around on me for looking through her phone. Then we got into a huge fight and I asked if she wanted to be with me and she said No. She then broke up with me, explaining, "Don't worry hun it's not forever, I'll come back, I'm never letting go, I just need time alone to re-balance my life and stuff." So I cried into her shoulder and walked home.

 

And after that for the next few days she was really loving like I always wanted her to be so I was back. So we kept that going, then she complained about me talking to her and saying that I had not moved on and that I still think we're dating, so what the hell is up with that.

 

So I called my mom and we decided to break off the possibility of friendship and ever getting back together, and a NC deal. It worked out great and I ignored her for a few weeks. Then I decided to talk to her again since she constantly asked when I would cut off the NC. Everything was good but guess what? We had a fight, again. This time she was mad at me for being so serious and mature and saying I was boring. Then that led to our relationship and her saying how horrible I was to her and how much crap I put her through. Then after that, I found myself still in love with her so I told her and told her I wanted to do NC again until she was dead to me, so we did that.

 

Then two days ago I came out of the NC thing which lasted a few weeks and she was the biggest jerk to me. Her response to everything was "Whatever. I don't f-ing care. I don't give a crap. Good for you, I don't f-ing care." acting as though it was a cirme talking to eachother and that I was a convict. So since she always had been doing this as friends, I got fed up, and wrote a three page letter to her- I made it the meanest I possibly could. I insulted everything from her looks, to her family, religion, how terrible she was, anything to break her. I hated her. She left me, then lied about coming back, then played me, then treated me like garbage. Did I mention the day I came out of the NC deal to cut off feelings for her, her grandpa died the morning before. So I said "Sorry, I'm just trying to cheer you up, I know it must be hard" then she replied "I don't really care what you do, I have a guy who keeps a smile on my face better than you ever could" Haha, again with the jealousy tactics. So I just stopped talking.

 

Anyways, I never sent the letter, I waited a few days to see if she'd apologize..nothing. So I made a new one which didn't insult anything personally but calling her a heartless cow and things of that matter. I was about to sent it but I asked her, "Hey. I have something I need to send to you and then I never want to talk to you ever again. Where's the best place for you, so that you can read it tonight?" And all she said was "Like I care." that's always how she's f-in been. I was so sick of it by now that I let it out on her partially through texting and she did the same, calling me names even before I did her. So eventually I called her the b word, told her to close her legs and shut the f word (this forum censors.) up and wait for my letter. Haha, that was amusing. So I sent it and her boyfriend got on my case so I got my friend on hers, drama llama night. At any rate, I said some mean stuff in there. She actedl ike it didn't hurt her at all but I know it did. No girl likes to be made fun of for looking like a man, called fat, etc. I knew all of her in secure points and I exploited them because dammit she deserved some recoil for putting me through so much crap.

 

Anyway so that's the story. She fell out of love with me, played my feelings, and treated me like crap as a friend even though I still loved her. So I tried to break her and start a huge fight to permanantly NC and to kill my feelings for her. I'm getting a restraining order on her and her boyfriend today to further the NC deal [aside from already blocking her and her friends and bf on every thing possible] and I can say for 100% I hate her and would smile if she died. So everything's good now but...

 

Did I truly have justification for what I sent to her? She started it all, dragged her boyfriend (who is 18, lives way far away in another state, and they date over halo...haha that's the best her fugly ass can get I guess) on me, and treated me like crap from day one.

 

 

Anyways, I'm just trying to move on and find someone new as I have been for the past month. I moved recently and know no one in my area, and I got to on online highschool, and I don't go to church, so I just go out every day for a few hours and walk around, go to stores etc in hopes of opening an oppertunity to meet a new girl or friend, and go from there, still no luck. I am not cocky, but I know I am good looking because all the girls say I am, and I know for a fact I am extremely affectionate and nice in relationships. So I don't have a problem getting a girl, the problem is finding.

 

 

Thanks for reading my big wall of text. It's very un-organized with no specific objective in mind except just for someone to listen and give feedback.

 

My main questions are about my letter I sent, how to heal after all of this, and move on to someone new. Etc.

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You sound just like my ex boyfriend when I left him. Do us all a big favor, and please grow up. You and your ex are way too immature to be in a romantic relationship right now in this time frame of your life.

 

I'm sorry if I sound mean, but this is just getting to me.

 

I know it hurts. You are suffering of the hate phase of the break up. It will go away in time. Right now, just focus on you. Forget her. Go out, meet new friends, reconnect with old friends, get a new hobby/job. Work hard in school. Get a makeover, new clothes, a new haircut, etc.

 

I promise you, in a few months, this will all be over.

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You sound just like my ex boyfriend when I left him. Do us all a big favor, and please grow up. You and your ex are way too immature to be in a romantic relationship right now in this time frame of your life.

 

I'm sorry if I sound mean, but this is just getting to me.

 

I know it hurts. You are suffering of the hate phase of the break up. It will go away in time. Right now, just focus on you. Forget her. Go out, meet new friends, reconnect with old friends, get a new hobby/job. Work hard in school. Get a makeover, new clothes, a new haircut, etc.

 

I promise you, in a few months, this will all be over.

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