WindowTo Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 Hey guys, I met this girl and we dated for a while. The whole thing was very ambiguous. She decided that she just wanted to be friends, but later wanted to talk and admitted that she had strong feelings for me and is just trying to protect herself because she is probably going to have to leave the state in 6 months. There are very few positions open for her job, and the chance of her finding something in the area are slim. Furthermore, I plan on changing careers in a few years and being on the move. I for one think that we should make the most of it, and even if her chances of staying are slim should continue a romantic relationship. It is not as if I am not looking for commitment, I think it is worth the chance, mainly because WE won't be hurting eachother if we have to part ways, it will just be the circumstances. What do you guys think of this situation, what would you do? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 of course. i would hate to miss an opportunity to meet someone great. Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 of course. i would hate to miss an opportunity to meet someone great. I'll second that. You don't know for sure she's leaving. Realize this up front though. Link to comment
IMAbadman Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 of course. i would hate to miss an opportunity to meet someone great. I'll second that. You don't know for sure she's leaving. Realize this up front though. Link to comment
jul-els Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 From her side it sounds like she could see herself getting too attached and is avoiding letting that happen, based on what you're saying. Link to comment
jul-els Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 From her side it sounds like she could see herself getting too attached and is avoiding letting that happen, based on what you're saying. Link to comment
WindowTo Posted April 13, 2009 Author Share Posted April 13, 2009 From her side it sounds like she could see herself getting too attached and is avoiding letting that happen, based on what you're saying. Yea, it is. She keeps telling me that she doesn't know what she is doing. She is does not seem to be very good at making decisions, and I fear that I am enabling her in this sense by agreeing to ambiguous terms. One side of me seems ok for things to be ambiguous, but it is starting to get irritating. Perhaps her capacity to stay distant is greater than mine. I want to tell her that people have been in tougher situations, and that she should make a decision. But that comes of sounding ultimatemish, which I don't really approve of. Link to comment
WindowTo Posted April 13, 2009 Author Share Posted April 13, 2009 From her side it sounds like she could see herself getting too attached and is avoiding letting that happen, based on what you're saying. Yea, it is. She keeps telling me that she doesn't know what she is doing. She is does not seem to be very good at making decisions, and I fear that I am enabling her in this sense by agreeing to ambiguous terms. One side of me seems ok for things to be ambiguous, but it is starting to get irritating. Perhaps her capacity to stay distant is greater than mine. I want to tell her that people have been in tougher situations, and that she should make a decision. But that comes of sounding ultimatemish, which I don't really approve of. Link to comment
jul-els Posted April 13, 2009 Share Posted April 13, 2009 Yea, it is. She keeps telling me that she doesn't know what she is doing. She is does not seem to be very good at making decisions, and I fear that I am enabling her in this sense by agreeing to ambiguous terms. One side of me seems ok for things to be ambiguous, but it is starting to get irritating. Perhaps her capacity to stay distant is greater than mine. I want to tell her that people have been in tougher situations, and that she should make a decision. But that comes of sounding ultimatemish, which I don't really approve of. Then the two of you are definitely not on the same page. Trying to pursue something with her will only lead to heartache for at least one of you and possibly both. Time to move on. Link to comment
Sn0man Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 I've tried this before more than once and it just doesn't work out. Not saying it couldn't, but you'd have to go in knowing that it's going to end and not let any feelings get in the way - meaning not getting emotionally involved. If you can handle that, then go for it. If you can't then don't put yourself through the trouble, it's just not worth it. Link to comment
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