Calling all lesbians

[rose666]

I have some questions I would love to get some responses to. Just for my own curiosity.

 

I was an exclusive lesbian for 15 years, then all of a sudden I met a man and you could have knocked me over with a feather. I honestly don't know what i would label myself now.

 

Anyway it left me with some questions.

 

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men?

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually?

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman?

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it?

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men?

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

10.

 

This is only for myself, not for research purposes or anything like that. Answer/don't answer whatever you want. Thanks

 

 

[folie_a_deux]

hey, i might not be much help, but ur wrong about gay men that don't have feelings about a woman. i think im more gay, but i still have feelings about girls sometimes

[lovekare]

1.I was 19 and was in the bathroom of a restaurant with my best friend, who was also my boyfriend's best friend's girlfriend. i picked her up and starting going to work, making out and much more. it was impulsive. I didn't think. so i knew i was gay.

2.I was 11 bt i didn't think it was considered sex. it was more natural than anything. she didn't think so either. we were young. Again at 19, i did have sex w a girl and loved it.

3. I dated too many guys. I was confused dring high school. i [mod edit] all of them. Bt it never felt real. i never got into it for me. it was all a show. it was all to please them.

4. I do think about men sometimes. some guys are cute. i tried dating guys for a bit after i came out. bt when it came down to a sexual intimacy, i couldn't. it didn't turn me on, plus i already knew what did turn me on during sex, and it was a woman. but i did have fun with guys. i know how to do myself and fake it. wink.

5. I almost always think about a woman when I masturbate. but sometimes that i'm craving penetration, i guess u could say i wonder about a guy. if a girl could penetrate me like a guy i'll rather have her than him. bt it worst comes to worst i guess i wouldn't mind being penetrated by a man.

6. The only thing about the lesbian community is that there is kinda of a standard look or mold, which i don't fit. I'm super girly, so most gay girls dismiss that I really like having sex with girls. they think i probably fake it.

7. It would suck if she left me for a guy but i left a guy for a girl, because it felt right. i would just have to understand that guys is what she wants so what can i do for her i'm not a guy. it would feel worse if she left me for a girl. b/c then i would feel it was just me who she didn't like.

8. I think sex is fluid, you sholdn't feel shamed of what your body likes. there's enough pressure out there. when you're alone, you should fantasize about what u want. if you listen close, you could probably figure out what it is that you like. Believe me I was a closet case for a while. and i used to try to fantasize about guys. but one time i let my thoughts go thinking about a girl i kinda liked, and i got the wetest i've ever been. then I [mod edit] ed my boyfriend thinking about her. it felt great and no one got hurt.

 

sometimes it's ok to indulge yourself into your fantasies. they will tell you who you are. and what you like.

[dizzymeg]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

A: My first clue was when I was 11 at camp. I had five female roommates and one day one of them told me there was a boy outside that wanted to ask me out. I said "why would I go out there when there's 5 beautiful girls in here?"

They all stared at me. I went outside and gained my first boyfriend.

 

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

A: My first time with a woman was at 22 years old. It was AMAZING. sans the unfortunate lack of emotion, it was the best sex I'd had as of yet. (And up until then I hated oral, little did I know it was simply being done wrong)

 

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men?

A: I had quite a few boyfriends. I only ever got serious with one though. He was the only guy I have ever had sex with. We even got engaged and the ring was gorgeous. I was in love with him. He was the most fantastic guy in the world and I couldn't understand why I still didn't feel complete. Up until then I had thought it was the guys I was with but it turns out the problem was with me all along. ALthough he was amazing and my best friend and everything a girl could ever ask for in a guy.. there was no sexual attraction. When we had sex I was simply going through the motions, doing what I thought you were supposed to do. I won't say I didn't ever orgasm, I did, thats never been an issue for me, besides, stimulation is stimulation and I was very comfortable around him. When he put the ring on my finger, at sunset, on the beach, on one knee: I had a sudden realization. I might be able to oppress my attraction to women but it would never go away and my relationship with this man would never be what he deserved in all of his amazing-ness. I could force myself to live a lie but I had no right to do that to him...so, in short, I broke it off, broke his heart, and came out of the closet. He's okay now, he married a mutual friend of ours and they're like peas in a pod. And me? I feel that I've found where I belong.

 

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men?

Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually?

A: Sure, I've had fantasies. I can never really get to climax when I think about a guy though, even my ex. When I imagine a woman however, it happens almost too quickly

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman?

A: Its always a particular person. I ge curious about other people and what they might be like in bed (you would never know this if you saw me I'm the biggest goodie two shoes) I can never climax when I think of a guy though.

 

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it?

A: I ID *much* more with lesbians and the gay community than the straight community. Does "it" refer to my identity or the lesbian community? I'm very comfortable with my identity sometimes I even forget that other ppl aren't so comfortable with gay ppl. very comfortable with the lesbian community. nothing I hate about either one, although there are some annoyances with the lesbian community...but really I think thats more related to humans than to lesbians..

 

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men?

A: Well, if they had been telling me the entire time that they were lesbian exclusively then all the sudden left for a man, I'd be a bit insulted and feel like I was lied to. but if they had told me that they were or possibly might be bisexual then not as much (but still a little, yes). I don't generally date bisexuals though (but thats a WHOLE other question).

 

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

A: hmmm..bisexual? I dunno, depends on her I guess. Personally I can't see how one could consider themselves a lesbian but only ever sexually fantasize about men. Maybe her lesbianism was simply a curiosity or an itch that had to be scratched. Ever heard of the Kinsey Scale? You might find it interesting..

 

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

A: Hmm... I have gay guy friends whom have had past R's with women or who have thought about what it might be like to be with a woman.... I dunno. I think the opposite sexes will always be curious about one another

 

10.

Your welcome!

[1WayTicket2Norway]

hey, i might not be much help, but ur wrong about gay men that don't have feelings about a woman. i think im more gay, but i still have feelings about girls sometimes

 

I have never ever ever been attracted to women sexually EVER!!! just the idea of having sex with a woman makes me feel a bit queezy

[folie_a_deux]

I have never ever ever been attracted to women sexually EVER!!! just the idea of having sex with a woman makes me feel a bit queezy

 

im bi, its pretty awesome being bi.. people think ur gay and watev, but if ur bi, u can go both ways. i reckon guys are hotter though.. for me its like a phase, its different for everyone, but there's days wen u wake up and see this uber hot chick and then u get horny, and days when ur like meh, and other days u like guys

[unabashed]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

I was first 19, but I didn't really accept it until I was in my 40's. I finally met a lesbian couple living the life I thought I couldn't have as a lesbian. They had kids, a house, and the love of their families. I realized that I had been holding myself back out of fear.

 

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

I was 19. It was awesome.

 

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men?

Yes, prolifically. I had many boyfriends, lots of sexual experiences, and a marriage to one man for over 20 years.

 

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually?

Not once I really came out. I never fantasized about men in a healthy type of interaction, ever. Now, the idea of being with a man is not at all attractive to me. I find myself liking a man, here or there, but if I think about sex with them, I realize that the attraction is not on that level (and never really was).

 

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman?

Nothing in particular--no men. Nothing I'd want to share.

 

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it?

I just don't think there is such an entity as the "lesbian community." There are various communities, and I don't fall so much into any of them. I do have number of lesbian friends, single and couples, and I prefer to socialize with them when I do have a chance to go out. I'm not very politically involved these days, and I don't fit any stereotypes. I am, however, very comfortable with myself and would have no problem joining forces at gay and lesbian pride events and things like that. There are things I hate, but I don't consider them a characteristic of "the community." I hate close-mindedness, so lesbian separatists don't impress me, and I'm not thrilled by people who think lesbians can only look or act a certain way. I don't like people who don't "believe" in bisexuality or other types of sexual or personal expression.

 

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men?

I don't know. You'd have to revive me if she left me for a man. I'd probably be more upset if someone left me for a woman.

 

 

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

I'd say that what she thinks about is her business. Plenty of people have fantasies about things that they would never do in real life, or about things that are forbidden or repulsive to them. Maybe she's not that turned off by men, she just likes women more. Maybe she likes the idea of penetration and hasn't recognized the powerful dynamic of penetration by a woman. I wouldn't assume anything, really.

 

 

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

I don't know, and I'm not sure if this is true. A lot of women who post of advice forums seem to have been confused, but I know a lot of lesbians in real life who have never been with a man. On the other hand, I do think that most women have grown up with very little encouragement to feel what they feel, or with lesbian role models. I think some women simply don't recognize that they really don't like men. They are more likely to blame themselves and think they have a lack of interest rather than realize that it's just men they don't want.

 

 

 

[poohdalou]

i knew i was a lesbian when i was around 12 years old . i kept it to myself but i did use to masterbate seeing other women .. I had several boyfriends in high school. i never really liked the sex i just wanted it over with. then finally at 28 i came out and decided to just do it. i have no regrets

[MELLIES]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened? I was in 2nd grade, and I had a crush on my friend Melissa. I remember smelling her hair when we were standing in line together walking down the hallways going to lunch or using the restroom.

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it? I was 19 years old, and I felt liberated. I felt like how it should've felt with a man.

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men? Yes.

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually? Actually, yes. I still do and it messes with my mind. Makes me think I'm bisexual. But I don't want a relationship with them.

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman? Mostly men, but then a woman will pop into my head that I'm interested in and I'll get really turned on and orgasm.

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it? Yes I do consciously identify with them. I am somewhat comfortable with it, because I know I'm part of it, but I don't like how they all know each other in one way or another and it is usually because they slept together.

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men? Two of my lovers have and it is really difficult to get over.

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men? That would bother me if I was involved in a relationship with her, but if we were friends, I would be able to identify with her.

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is? Well, there is a big difference between a woman and a man. I think men are much more narrow-minded in the sense that they have more of a one-track mind. Whereas women take into account all factors, and are a bit more open-minded.

[StretchGee]

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is? Well, there is a big difference between a woman and a man. I think men are much more narrow-minded in the sense that they have more of a one-track mind. Whereas women take into account all factors, and are a bit more open-minded.

 

Check out the study by John Michael Bailey. In short, women tend to be bi, men tend to be gay/straight. It is like 80/20 in both - for women , 20% have a solid sexual orientaion (either way), while for men 80% have a solid sexual orientation.

[Trammel]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

It was kind of a long process, but I guess when I was 22 and I met a girl where i was working and I was hit by unbelievable sexual attraction that I had never felt for any man.

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it? I fooled around from age 22 on, but had actual sex at 25 (with the woman i've been with for the last 12 years). It was amazing, like other women have said in this forum...

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men? Yes, from age 16 to 25...

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually? I can imagine myself with a man sexually, I do have fantasies about men. But I don't feel I could have an emotional connection with a man.

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman? Men or women, depending on my mood...

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it? I'm living in Italy, and there isn't the whole "attitude" or "identity" that I would say there is in America. When I'm in america I feel like the "lesbian community" if you want to call it that, has a lot of rules and that you have to be or look a certain way to be accepted.

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men? No, it would bother me either way.

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men? I think your sexual fantasies are your business. I think it's not so important to label yourself, but to see if your relationship is working.

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is? I have no idea. the only thing I could say is that women are more "trained" to follow society's rules, and so maybe it takes us more time to figure out what we really like.

[mylove]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

When I was 20.I was in a dorm and started fantasizing about my roommate..and without even making out with her..i could smell her,feel her,imaigne my kiss etc..

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

I never could have sex with any cause I never got the chance till date,but recently I did kiss a girl who I am crazily in love thru a game..a couple of times..even when drunk and she never seemed to mind...and till date she picks me out from our group of friends more then others..

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men? not yet....

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually? I can imagine myself with a man sexually, I do have fantasies about men sometimes..and like seeing them naked..

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman? Women..my current crush and love..

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about ? i have never experienced it...

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men? Yes..my current love is engaged..and I know she will marry him..but there sometihng between us that not with any of our other friends...

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

Maybe thought bout men turn her on..while physical intimacy with women seems better?

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

I think men are maybe not taught to display themselves emotionally as much as women do..even with friends..women can be close with women without anyone jugding while its difficult for men to even hold hands...

[manson26]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

I was in a movie theater watching The Hours, and when I saw Julianne Moore kiss Toni Collette I knew for sure. I had always got crushes on women but I thought something was wrong with me. That movie made me feel better about myself. I was 22 or 23

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

I was 23 when I had my first time. It would have been amazing if I didn't hate that woman now. Other then that, I felt good about it.

 

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men?

I have never dated a guy nor had sex with one. I was never interested really.

 

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually?

To be honest I never have given it thought. I had a guy friend for about 2 years, and towards the end of it I knew he was in love with me. I just felt repulsed. I don't know, the thought of it grosses me out.

 

5. When you masturbate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman?

Whatever I'm watching, lol. Generally whatever girl I've got a crush on at the time.

 

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it?

I don't mind being apart of it. There are stereotypes that follow the one lesbian bar near me I don't like or want to be apart of. They are all butch, and it's been said everyone 'knows' everyone else. I'm not particularly fond of that.

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men?

That has happened to me. I was with a bi for 2 years. She's dating a man now. It makes me angry, because I know I'd never be able to provide whatever feeling she gets from a man.

 

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

That there's a certain sexual gratification you get from a man that you can't get from a woman? I'm not sure what to think about that.

 

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

That's a darn good question. I see it too. I think that lots of times men are more sure of themselves being gay then woman. Like women find it harder to accept. So try and not to accept it. I feel that because there's more gay then lesbians on the dating sites too. It's like they all hide or something.

[rose666]

Thanks a lot for all your responses...I really appreciate it! And it was very interesting....

 

Someday when I have time I will explain my whole story...

[toflyforreal]

well this thread was bumped, so i'll answer too. =)

 

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened?

I fell HARD for my best friend when I was 16. I wasn't sure if I was a lesbian, but three or so consecutive girl crushes later it was getting more obvious.

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it?

17, drunk, and felt great about it. Even though I knew I didn't love the girl I just thought, this feels right, this feels great! And to this day I don't regret, having sex with this short-term girlfriend.

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men?

Date - barely. I'd let some take me out occasionally. I had sex with one as kind of a dare with myself. It didn't prove much.

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually?

Yes, I did. Shortly after I came out I fell hard for a guy I met. We got involved a few years after that (I was involved with mainly women in the mean time) and he is like the "exception" guy that I was interested in emotionally and physically. Though more emotionally than anything else i suppose.

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman?

I think about all kinds of sex. But thinking of a hot woman will really bring me to climax.

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it?

It's something I've only begun to consider recently. But then again I'm only 21.

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men?

Both would be sad for me.

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men?

I would say, this isn't THAT strange. I actually fantasize about d*cks a lot when masturbating.. hope that isn't too x-rated to admit here. But it is always anchored by my knowledge that i LOVE women and want to be with them, and retain only the smallest most passing kernel of interest in ever being with any men. Because when it comes to the real world, I almost always want to keep that fantasy, a fantasy.

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

I do think it's partially what others have said, which is that women are encouraged to be open minded and more broad-thinking in their options. To self-define as "lesbian" seems very black and white to some women, though ultimately it is a useful title if only to indicate, politically, what your main preference is.

However, I was just chatting with a gay friend of mine last night who admitted that "making out with a girl wasn't the worst thing." And funny, I feel the same thing about the occasional guy here or there; though I feel the years of youthful experimentation must sometimes come to a close.

10. Thanks...

You're welcome! And hope to hear your stories some day

[rose666]

Thanks for responding. This was very informative.

 

Ok about me. I'm not conducting some kind of sociological survey. I was asking for myself, because of my experience.

 

Long story short. I only dated men until I was 26. I had never thought I was gay at all. Never consciously experienced sexual feelings for women. Or for men for that matter. I was a very frigid person. I dated so many guys had lots of bfs, but the Rs would always break up when it came to sex, because I was so cold.

 

There is ONE big exception. When I was 21, I definitely fell in love in a big way with a girlfriend. I didn't think of it as lesbian, but I knew something had happened to me. It was totally overwhelming. We were "together" in the same school for a year, then I left and she stayed. That was the saddest day of my life. Leaving her, I felt like I was dying. Later, I heard she got a bf and I was totally destroyed. But still, I never thought of her sexually and I never thought of this as lesbian.

 

Fast forward to age 26. That's when I came out of the closet...or thought I did. I made the conclusion that the reason I had no sexual feelings for men was because I was gay. And so I lived as a gay woman for a looong time...even though I was never really happy and never satisfied and ALWAYS felt uncomfortable in that community.

 

I lived in LA and knew tons of lesbians. I lived with a girl who ran the lesbian sorority on campus. It was like the L Word, literally. It was Lesbian Central. And I always felt so weird, so out of place.

 

I had a few relationships, but I NEVER had great sex, and I never felt the same love I had had for that first gf. But still that's what I thought.

 

Meanwhile, the whole time I was gay, I was secretly fantasizing about men all the time, reading straight erotica, and watching straight porn. I never ever fantasized about women. But I still never thought anything about it. That's what I was.

 

Anyway, I eventually met a guy. And then I had this whole long coming out of the non-gay closet. I discovered my sexuality. Literally, for the first time. This was soooo hard to do. I was so confused. So sure I was gay that I could not comprehend this was real. For me, the crucial thing is the physical side. I love women, but I don't respond as I do to men. That's why I was so curious if any other lesbians have ever had feelings for men. I mean, CAN you have this craving for the "male member" har har (don't want to get warned) and still be gay?

 

I still don't get it....I know for a fact that I am extremely attracted to men. But I have never felt overwhelming love for a man as I have for a woman, and I can't imagine that I ever will. The closest I get is that sex leads to emotional feelings for me. I have been in love with a man, but it's totally tied to the sex we are having. With women, before, it was non-physical and so much more mental.

 

Yes I know some people will say I'm bisexual. I don't know. I just know there is this strong split between what I want and crave from each gender.

 

A lot of people say what I really want is a woman with a d**k. Har har. If that's true I'm screwed!

[hellodoe]

1. How old were you when you knew you were a lesbian? Why? What happened? I was in preschool, I thought about kissing women all the time. I could go into more detail but it's inappropriate for this forum haha.

 

2. How old were you when you first had sex with a woman? How did you feel about it? 15, it was incredible. it wasn't a sexual thing really (besides that it was sex). It was more loving, I felt appreciated, adored, loved, respected.

 

3. Did you ever date/have sex with men? No. What a waste of tiime.

 

4. Once you came out, did you ever have sexual fantasies about men? Can you ever imagine yourself with a man--esp. sexually? Of course I have entertained myself with fantasies of men, would I ever act on them? No. Because I'm not attracted to them.

 

 

5. When you mastrubate, what do you generally think about? A particular person, man/woman? Never particular person.

 

 

6. Do you consciously id with the lesbian community? Are you comfortable with it? Is there anything you hate about it? I love the lesbian community, dislike the crazies hurting the perpetuating stereotypes.

 

 

7. Would it bother you more if your lover left you for a man or started dating men? Yes =/. I would feel lied to.

 

 

8. What would you think about a self-professed lesbian who only ever had sexual fantasies about men? Nothing. There are two types of people who masturbate. Those who think about things they would never do or want to do to get off and those who masturbate about things they've done and could do. Plus, i think this is a silly question. A lesbian who "ONLY EVER" has sexual fantasies with men? Oh please.

 

 

9. It seems that most gay men I know have absolutely zero interest in women and never have, whereas a lot of lesbians have had past Rs with men or think about it. Why do you think this is?

It's wrong.

[AlphaFemme]

That's why I was so curious if any other lesbians have ever had feelings for men. I mean, CAN you have this craving for the "male member" har har (don't want to get warned) and still be gay?

 

Sure. I don't mind the penis itself; sometimes a girl wants that feeling. However, I'm not especially attracted to the large, hairy person it's attached to. That's why the feeldoe and other toys are popular. I think some men are very pretty. Sometimes, I think a nice male body is sexy. But... I really don't want one naked next to me. It's okay to be bi, but if you want a romantic relationship with a woman, and don't really find men emotionally attractive, I can't see how a healthy hetero relationship could blossom.

[bebelight]

1. When I was 10 or so me and my friend pretended to be girlfriends and we would kiss. Then in High School I kept hooking up with girls as well as guys. I went through the whole one day I'd be lesbian and the next day I'd be straight.

 

2. To be honest it was weird. The girl who I did it with is "straight" even though she initiated it completely. The next time was AMAZING though, she looked like Bette and Carmen from the L Word. HOT.

 

3. Well, I go every way so yeah.

 

4. yep yep yep.

 

5. I have yet to. I know it's unhealthy, but I grew up in an extremely religious household and have yet to shake this rule.

 

6. I love the community. It's hard though being bi. A lot of times they'll want to date me until they learn I like men too.

 

7. Happened before. It is what it is. We're super close.

 

8. I would guess they are sexually repressed by the social sexual norm. Maybe they dig more 'butchy' chicks?

 

9. I have personally dated men who turned out to be gay. Also I have hooked up with out gay boys. One of them says he likes sex with select girls, but nothing more.

 

Really everything is so simple, in my opinion: Sexuality is fluid and we keep trying to squash everything and prescribe to these labels. I mean if a lesbian thought a guy was hot I wouldn't call her bi, just a sexual being.