He's been looking at the erotic services section of craigslist..

[AtlantaGirl1607308012]

I'm a little paranoid that my boyfriend is now seeking prostitutes. Yesterday I was at his apartment using his computer and I saw in the history of internet explorer that he was on craigslist and that he has been looking at the Erotic Services section. Mainly that's the section where you meet prostitutes and hookers so I've heard. Most of the women our located in our area..

 

When I confronted him about it, he said he just likes to look at the women on there. He would never think about meeting one.I would like to believe him but I'm having doubts.I don't see anything where he's tried to contact these women. I know he's used Craigslist before because he told me that he met a guy on there who was selling his Xbox & that my boyfriend bought it from him. So if he was willing to meet a guy off of Craigslist for an Xbox.. What would stop him from meeting a hooker? I don't know I'm being paranoid. I mean couldn't he just look at a porn site? Why is he getting off looking at hookers?

 

Then next week is his birthday. He said something about getting a hotel and just chillin with his boys to drink. Now I'm paranoid thinking he's going to get a hooker and go to a hotel with.. I don't know.. I'm suspicious now of him. I want to trust him but I don't know...

[meepmeep20]

oh man, i feel bad for you. sounds like some type of cheating. reminds me of the times when my ex used to cheat on me. similar excuses.

[meepmeep20]

be weary. use a condom with this guy.

[agent1607307371]

So if he was willing to meet a guy off of Craigslist for an Xbox.. What would stop him from meeting a hooker?

 

You honestly can't see the difference in scale between buying a computer console and buying sex?

 

Has he given you reason to think he'd cheat/use prostitutes?

[coldplay.]

Its like this, its the holiday present that hes not supposed to look at hidden in an obvious place. Hes going to look, if you dont trust when he says there was no intention, i guess thats something you will have to deal with.

 

I would be concerned about it but not crazy, its the same as looking at porn i guess. Depends on how you feel about it, and how much you trust him. I used to look at them sometimes for the exact reasons he cites, not because id ever consider craigslist personals or erotic services, but just because its there to see.

[jengh]

Well...he could be one of those people that just browses CL for entertainment (I do that)... but when you said he's getting a hotel room with the boys..that brought up a big red flag for me...

 

Has he ever given you a reason not to trust him in the past?

[Simplicity1]

Has he lied to you lately about anything? Has he been different, not treating you the way you'd like to be treated?

 

Unless there's a problem in your relationship somewhere, I don't think you should worry. Talk to him about it, and let him know that you're not comfortable with him going through classified ads for erotic services. If he's a good guy, he will stop if you ask him to. Just talk to him and don't make him feel like you're trying to control him, just let him know how you feel without yelling at him or anything.

[uhohlala]

I agree with BabyCairo: the Craigslist browsing could definitely be harmless. The hotel room for his bday, however, sounds a little dicey.

 

If you're not in general a suspicious, jealous person who feels like she can't trust her partner, you should pay attention to your gut: you were motivated to look at his browsing history, and you're uneasy about what's going on. Don't discount that instinct.

[AtlantaGirl1607308012]

You honestly can't see the difference in scale between buying a computer console and buying sex?

 

Has he given you reason to think he'd cheat/use prostitutes?

 

For the last couple of weeks my boyfriend has been acting rather distant. Like he doesn't call like he used to. Mainly it's basically me initiating the calls now. When I call, he always answers and talks to me but I feel like something is wrong. He doesn't even make an effort to be with me unless I initiate it. I feel like something or someone else is occupying his time.. He claims he's just been busy and stress with work since he's a manager at a restaurant but I don't know..

[AtlantaGirl1607308012]

when you said he's getting a hotel room with the boys..that brought up a big red flag for me...

 

 

That's what striked me as odd too... I mean couldn't they all go to a bar to drink or something??? Getting a hotel seems weird. How many guys all get a hotel to drink just for fun?

[jengh]

That's what striked me as odd too... I mean couldn't they all go to a bar to drink or something??? Getting a hotel seems weird. How many guys all get a hotel to drink just for fun?

 

Yeah, it's really odd... that's something you do in high school to avoid getting busted by your parents... but as grown men? It seems sketchy.

[laisla]

huge red flag

[Night Pumpkin]

Some people browse those sections for purely amusement services. I have browsed the "men seeking men" section and I certainly am not gay. Just sometimes when I am bored, I find it amusing to read stuff like that.

 

But erotic services is especially for people looking for sex, so I think that is more serious. II would be concerned. I think you do need to confront him about this one.

[DJBaby]

I don't think a hotel party is that much of a red flag. Sometimes it's nice to have a party, crash where you are (no driving or paying for cabs), and not have to clean up the next day...

 

As for CL, I am a chick and I look at the erotic services section because it makes me laugh a little... entertainment purposes only!

 

Unless you have other reasons to suspect something is going on, I think you should chill on this one... and make sure to use a condom.

[AtlantaGirl1607308012]

See this is where I'm confused... He's been acting so uninterested in me lately. He hasn't been calling much at all. I call him about everyday and I think he may have called me twice within the last 3 weeks. It just feels like I'm losing him. He claims he's busy and blah blah blah. But now that I've seen this thing with craigslist.. it raises my suspicions about what he's doing when I'm not around.

[diabolik]

That's what striked me as odd too... I mean couldn't they all go to a bar to drink or something??? Getting a hotel seems weird. How many guys all get a hotel to drink just for fun?

There could be a relatively innocent reason for this.

1. Maybe they're playing poker.

2. Depending on how many guys, it might be a lot cheaper to get a hotel room plus BYOB than drinking at a bar. Plus as mentioned earlier, everyone can get hammered and no DWI concerns. But as a single guy, I couldn't imagine going to a hotel room to drink unless there was some other draw, like a poker tourney.

3. One of the guys is having a bachelor party - hotel room needed because they are bringing in strippers.

 

If he was going to cheat, why would he even mention the hotel? Unless of course, he also said he wouldn't be coming home that night.

 

See this is where I'm confused... He's been acting so uninterested in me lately. He hasn't been calling much at all. I call him about everyday and I think he may have called me twice within the last 3 weeks. It just feels like I'm losing him.

This alone warrants a serious conversation about where your relationship stands.

[skyblue1]

Nah i wouldn't trust him. To be honest with you i feel he wants to have s*x and his looking for it else where. I don't trust men

[DJBaby]

Nah i wouldn't trust him. To be honest with you i feel he wants to have s*x and his looking for it else where. I don't trust men

 

This is not a healthy view. You can't not trust all men.

 

OP- sounds like you need to have a talk with him.

[HeartGoesOn]

Hard to tell if he is cheating, but looking at other women on "Craiglist", certainly doesn't say he's not cheating.

 

Also, I think that with him telling you that he's staying in a hotel to chill with his friends on his birthtday tells you the direction your relationship is going.

 

If he had any respect for you, he wouldn't hesitate to spend his birthday with you.

[thatdoggirl]

Hmm.. there's no sure sign that of anything but if you are finding you are continuously feeling like you can't trust him then that is a problem. I agree with having a talk with him about it.

 

The distant stuff may honestly have nothing to do with this craigslist stuff. Since you call everyday and he's been telling you that he's been under a lot of stress he's probably just gotten used to and taken advantage of you doing the calling. I'd say to back off a little bit and wait for him to call you.

[Ms Darcy]

You are getting some good feedback here.

 

How long have you two been in the relationship?

 

As you mention he is getting distant, there are really three main possibilities.

 

One, he is cheating on you through Craigslist and is distancing himself due to his infidelity.

Two, he is planning to cheat on you and may hope to make a move during the hotel party or some other opportunity.

Three, he is a combination of busy and a little bored with the relationship. He's not really looking to cheat, he's just not looking to connect with you much either. In this case, because you initiate, he's got nothing to worry about.

 

In all cases, I would advise taking a step back. I can hear the stress and worry (naturally) in your posts. Initiate a little less, give him space, and let's see what he does. Stepping back will help you distance yourself a bit - stop worrying about if you are losing him and focus on your life.

 

It will also show you what's going on with him. He honestly may just be busy/bored and needed a little realization that he can't take you for granted to get him off his rear and spending more time with you. But if he continues to distance himself, then this is real cause for concern and makes possibilities one and two more likely. At that time, it's time to sit down and talk about the status of your relationship, your concerns, and what you are looking for in the relationship.

 

Let's wait and see on this one since the jury is still out on whether or not is he is actually cheating. Best to you.

[Scorpion Fury]

You honestly can't see the difference in scale between buying a computer console and buying sex?

 

Has he given you reason to think he'd cheat/use prostitutes?

 

seriously, big difference.

 

i look at it too when im bored or feel like laughing. i'd never contact them. people on craigslist are total freaks