canali Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 Just wondering? Broke up 2 yrs in Sept had intermittent contact from me and so initiated true NC only 6 weeks now....still too raw to put myself out there to have another gig go kaboom in my heart...trying to just really heal get stronger better yada yada...that said I do miss the company and affirmation I'm attractive too...don't know if its possible to do "dating light" as while you may want to just be casual and have some fun what if someone makes your heart skip a beat? That right now would freak me out and have me running away for the hills....anyone relate and what to do? Link to comment
ratfreak Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 It scares me that I might fall for someone again and get hurt BUT at the same time if you don't get out there and see new people you just might meet the person that will be worth putting yourself out there again. Link to comment
canali Posted April 10, 2009 Author Share Posted April 10, 2009 You are right! Again using my analogy of an injury you have to eventually use that limb again even gently at first as life moves on either with you or without you...It scares me that I might fall for someone again and get hurt BUT at the same time if you don't get out there and see new people you just might meet the person that will be worth putting yourself out there again. Link to comment
viajera Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 I'm with you Canali, still too scared and raw to get out there and do any real dating. But I'm all for the "dating light" as you call it, or "playing with boys" as I call it. As a gringa in a Latin American country, all I have to do is walk to the bar down the street (always with one or more friends, of course) and I have guys hitting on me and asking me out, even guys as young as 19 (I'm 36, and in this rural area where most people start having kids in their teens, I literally could be their mothers. Ewww!). Heck, all I have to do is walk through town in midday and I have guys whistling (usually directed in an appreciative rather than creepy/threatening way) and flirting. It's a game for them as much as for us - they would be surprised if we ever actually gave in and kissed them or went out with them - so it's safe all around. Neither I nor them are going to get hurt. It's a great source of validation and fun, and just what I need right now. I highly recommend a little flirting therapy! Link to comment
canali Posted April 10, 2009 Author Share Posted April 10, 2009 I like that prelude to even "dating light" ie flirting therapy ....great idea and confidence builder so thanks ! I'm actually trying to force myself NOT ask out for a date any woman I like/am sexually attracted to(I am a guy lol very horny lately too lol) but instead try to think "can this person and I just hang out enjoy one another"?... even better as part of a group setting and seeing it as friendship potential.... thus less pressures and expectations...easier said than done!! ...but I really could do with more friends anyway vs another intimate relationship. Link to comment
ratfreak Posted April 10, 2009 Share Posted April 10, 2009 and one can never have too many friends. ya dating light sounds easy but i don't have an environment like viajera to start from. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.