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All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You

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Well I posted my story on another forum but all the people there seem very negative (no offense if they see this lol.)

 

Anyway, I've been going through a very tough time. Brief relationship history...

 

First Love, met when we were 14. BEST friends for 6 months, then date for a month short of three years. At this time, she breaks up with me because "she doesnt love me anymore." Took her for granted, I was a little mean and quite frankly I really DIDNT deserve her. We remain best friends talking day and night and within a month, she falls in love with me again. Date for another 7 months, she goes away to college in the first month of that, and now she breaks up with me again. She fell out of love, I wasnt fullfilling her needs, she wants to be free, doesnt like the two hour distance. This time we remain friends. We talk even more than we have been in the two days since we broke up and she is angry that our relationship gets better AFTER we break up. A couple days later she gets really drunk and kisses another guy and has "feelings" for him. At this point I tell her I cannot talk to her with this other guy in the picture...

 

That day she tells me she is very upset but understands, includes "maybe its just a rebound," "Maybe we can date after college," "Hopes we can be friends soon," "She still feels a part of my family," and that she still loves me very much and cares for me as a friend.

 

So three days go by and I call her, wanting to meet up and speak AS FRIENDS. She says no and is very angry with me for some reason (I think because I stopped speaking to her.) She says she will never love me again, never wants to be with me again, she is a better person without me, and has NO feelings for me whatsoever but is still not over me and seeing me is going to make this hard for her. She hangs up and was very, very nasty to me.

 

Now the next day she texts me and says she is very sorry for acting like that and wants to be friends but is not ready yet because it is a big adjustment. Which made me feel good because she apologized which means she cares. Also from her AIM profile it says that this is very hard but also the right thing for her right now.

So what do I do?

I want her back, badly. I have not contacted her since and she is going to be home from college next month for summer. She lives down the road from me. Is NC the best way? Does anyone think there is any chance for us left? And her little thing with that guy is over now although she has not contacted me yet. I am thinking of seeing new people just to see what else is out there. What do you all think?

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Leave her alone and yes, see other people. It already didn't work out twice. It sounds like she keeps coming back to you because you have a long history together and are familiar to her. familiar = comforting, not scary, and knowing what to expect, even if it's being treated badly. It feels safer than taking the risk of being single for a while or dating new people.

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Sorry you had a bad experience on the other forum...can't imagine why people would be so mean to a person who is in pain.

 

Just give her time and space...if it's meant to be it will happen and if not you will always have a good friend...both of you are young and need to venture out and see the world...don't tie yourself up with one person just for the sake of not being alone.

 

You will be just fine. I was with my ex for 5 years and we had it rough, but now since we are broke up I am much happier and at peace, even doing so much better in my life...me and him are good friends now and will remain that way until death. I have no problems with any of my ex's to my knowledge.

 

Sometimes it's nicer to be friends with a person you were close to than to have them for a partner....big world lots of girls and many opportunities...go for it !

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update on my story...

 

she contacted me on aim to talk about things

said how she doesnt want to be with me again, nothing personal, but still wants to be friends.

I told her i am bitter about how things played out and wished things did not go this way.

She was very nice about things but I just feel so bad...I want her back still, I wanted her for the rest of my life.

She said she is still very pissed I made changes about myself AFTER the relationship...and she had been doing all the speaking about the relationship, I didnt bring it up.

She also told me she still had feelings for someone else, and at this point i told her i cant speak to her until he is out of the picture because i love her and myself far too much. she said "Hes not going anywhere soon" so i said alright that is fine, be safe. She was very annoyed.

Have i severed all chances of us ever being together again?

 

WHAT NOW!?

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