misshim Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 i really like this guy and he knows it cause we have a mutual friend who told him. we meet at the gym and he seems intrested...we talk on face book etc and he kinda flirts...but unlike me who waits hours and hours to talk to him...he sort of says i have to go...sleepy etc and is the first to log off....he also hasnt made any real moves.......lots of people including his sister say he is completely shy....his last girlfriend was like 5 years ago....he is 30...i am 27. should i just give up? even on facebook its me who initiates the converstaion...please let me know what u guys think? i really like him Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 how did you meet at a gym or did a friend introduce you guys? that is like the one and only place i haven't approached a girl. they usually have headphones on and i don't like bothering people working out as i hate it when i get bothered. looks like here you might have to put some pursuit in on your end. he might be the type that likes girls to make the moves because he cannot read signals. you been giving him some? Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 i dunno - maybe ask if he wants to grab lunch after a workout at the gym one day and see what he says. Link to comment
misshim Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 yeah i do have my ipod but i am always smiling at him....he works at the same company different branch....so we got breifly introduced through work....the friend just told him i like him....its frustrating that i have to do all the work thats how i feel anyway....i thought guys dont like girls who appraoch them.... Link to comment
misshim Posted April 7, 2009 Author Share Posted April 7, 2009 annie i cant do that....i never have...if he turns me down...i will just die.... Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 well you know how a lot of guys feel then having to always do the work. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 look - if he is as shy as you say he is, then he will probably appreciate being approached. even if he wasn't all that shy, and you asked him to go get lunch or a smoothie after a workout, i bet he would be flattered and say yes. i highly doubt that he would say no. afterall, you're not asking him to move in with you, you're just suggesting a friendly lunch or smoothie, none of which is a big deal. think about it - if you met a new female friend at the gym, you might suggest getting lunch with her too sometime, and you wouldn't think anything of it. so, i think you will get it out there, and if he is a bonehead and says no to lunch, then you totally know he is not interested, or a total social idiot, and then you can move on. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 i love when annie gets vicious. but it's true. if you really want to know, sometimes you gotta bite the bullet and do it. then, you won't have to trouble your mind over this guy anymore. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 lol. somebody just came into my office and told me i was being vicious too. sigh. i am on edge these days. but seriously ghost - say a woman came up to you and suggested getting a smoothie after a workout - wouldn't you say yes? i mean, just the fact that she had the balls to approach you like that. even if you weren't sure she was your type, you'd probably take 30 minutes and get a smoothie and get to know her a little bit, right? even as a friend. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 lol. somebody just came into my office and told me i was being vicious too. sigh. i am on edge these days. but seriously ghost - say a woman came up to you and suggested getting a smoothie after a workout - wouldn't you say yes? i mean, just the fact that she had the balls to approach you like that. even if you weren't sure she was your type, you'd probably take 30 minutes and get a smoothie and get to know her a little bit, right? even as a friend. i wouldn't mind gettin a smoothie with a girl after a workout. but i'm sure if some girl just came up out of nowhere, she is wanting more than friends. but i'd go to hear her out. she'd have to be somewhat attractive to me though. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 yeah, exactly. misshim - if you aren't his type, then no matter on whether you approach or do not approach him, the outcome is the same, he won't date you. if he is shy, then asking him to a smoothie will help break the ice and he will likely give you a chance and get to know you better. at that point, i would let him be the next one to initiate plans. i figure if he's really interested after the smoothie meetup, he'll ask you out again. if he's not, he'll just let things fizzle out. either way, i guess you will know. i don't see anything to lose if you approach him and be friendly. Link to comment
SoMuchLove Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Usually if someone is shy you have to pursue more to get them to open up. If he turns you down you can always meet someone else who will have you. Link to comment
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