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Should I stay or should I leave? Please help!


babs

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First of all, hi everyone.

This is going to be hard to explain but I'm going to do my best to describe my entire situation. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 5 years, living together for 4 1/2.

The over the past 2-3 things have gone downhill and I am not feeling the same feelings for him anymore. We fight all the time, the name calling is persistent. I feel unappreciated. I don't desire him as much as I used to.

I've met a man online who has a professional job and makes a six-figure salary. We really, really like each other and the feelings are mutual. We want to pursue a relationship with each other and he says that if I become his girlfriend I will never have to worry about anything. He says he will spoil me like it's a dream, and I beileve him and know he is geniune about that.

What I want to know is if it's worth the risk? Should I take a chance? Is it worth it?

 

Me and my current boyfriend are renting a basement apartment, we have no car and no real prospects for a wealthy future. I've been examining my life lately and have realised that I want more. I want a nice house, a family and an upper middle class lifestyle. I'm not sure if my current boyfriend can give me that, it has been 5 years and I have none of those things.

I am 25 years old and its getting to the point where I want to settle down with someone who will be able to provide for me. I'm an attractive and intelligent girl, and my online man understands that and wants me in his life. He says that if I am with him I will be taken care of until the day he dies.

 

Is it worth risking my current relationship to pursue this man?

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welcome to enotalone.

 

first off, i see two separate issues here. i wouldn't recommend jumping from one relationship to another. you don't seem into your current bf, so you should probably end that, regardless of this new guy or not. you should tell him how you feel and break things off.

 

second, a lot of guys will say ANYTHING they think will hook you in the beginning. and then once you are hooked, they go back to their bad boy ways, or even ditch you for the next girl. so i don't know about this six-figure-man or if he will stand the test of time, or even date you for more than a month!!!!

 

are you sure you don't want to work things out with your current bf?

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I'm sorry, but you sound shallow. You're willing to throw away a five year relationship over money? Cars, expensive things?

 

Go ahead. Dump your bf and go after this magical genie you found over the internet. He'll grant you a few wishes, and POOF, he's gone.

 

And you'll be left all alone, tears and broken dreams.

 

 

Sorry, but I had to be blunt.

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You know, I can't really say he won't ditch me for sure, but this guy seems pretty genuine. I think I might have came on here hoping for people to tell me to go for it.

 

we don't know. you barely know this man, at all. that's not the point anyways. you should really first deal with your current relationship, decide whether to end it or not.

 

there are no guarantees in relationships, that he will or won't stay with you. unless you are having an arranged marriage somewhere in rural india, no one can gaurantee that this man will be true to you, much less even ask you out for a second date. some men just like a challenge, and stealing away a woman from her long term boyfriend is a challenge! and once they are done and have had their fun, the challenge is gone, and they are off to the next girl!!! i don't know if this man is like that or not, but here is a guy you barely know so how do you know he is Mr. Right or even if you want to stay with him and date him? you don't. unless it's all about money, in which case, i guess it doesn't matter. but still, what if he loses his job too? that has been happening in this economy. what if he can't find another job? would you still be interested in him?

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I think that if you are unhappy with your current boyfriend and there is name calling, you should definetly leave. You are not happy and he may not be either if this happens.

 

As for the online man, I would say try it out but proceed with caution. He may just be saying what you want to hear.

 

Money is NOT everything. I was with a guy who had tons of cash but treated me like dirt and with a great man who barely got by and we had a great time together.

 

Age doesn't matter and if you want a house, car and a good wage - YOU should earn it on your own and never rely on someone else to provide for you. The dark ages are over.

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The money seems to be a big issue here. Money won't make you happy.

 

I assume that you have never even met this man on the internet. He could be saying any kind of crap and make it seem genuine. There are a lot of manipulative people about.

 

If he is that much of a catch, why is he still single anyway?

 

I think you need to think long and hard before leaving a 5 year relationship for a promise from a rich stranger.

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Would you have considered leaving your current bf if you had not met this new guy? Maybe you already decided you want to persue with the internet guy and you just want confirmation from others. Only you know your situation best, and you need to live with your choice. But just don't regret the choice you make if the internet guy isn't who you think he is.

 

It's not bad to expect more but like someone mentioned "you should earn it and not rely on someone else"

 

But then again maybe the internet guy is great ...who knows?

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veritgo, believe me, once you get to be my age you will realize that income is very important. It's important to have a man that will be able to support you and provide for you.

 

 

 

Yes, but not a stranger from the internet that you've never met, who for all you know, could be 75 yrs old, and a pedophile.

 

A stranger on the internet would not be offering another stranger something like that, without having something up his sleeve.

 

Why not just break up, and find someone in real life, as this sounds like a fantasy.

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