How do you end a relationship that is no good for you?

[scared and alone]

Especially when you live a few days away from home, have no money, have pets, been with this person your whole adult life.

[ratfreak]

With the help of friends.

[scared and alone]

I don't have any here I have no one here. In fact, everyone is in different time zones. ugh. It also doesn't help that he's trying to get me to stay, but I know that its pointless. I can't keep doing this to myself. I love him so much, but he does not treat me right.

[jul-els]

If you have friends or family in a different time zone can you move closer to them? If so, contact them and explain your situation and ask them if you can get some help getting moved. If not, ask people where you work if they know anyone who has a place for rent or look online for places you can move to.

[scared and alone]

Thats what im trying to do, get a hold of my mom or someone who can possibly help me move. I'm not employed.

[alli]

I would ask a couple family members to come help you move. If you think he might try to harm you & your family when you move out, try to get a couple trusted male family members to help (dad, uncle, etc). Tell them what the situation is & that you want to move back home, but you don't have the means to move out & need their help.

 

Or you could just take what is really important to you that will fit in a bag & take a bus home if you have no other options. Sucks that you can't take your pets, but you do what you have to do. Unless you have your own car, then you could take the pets too.

 

Items can be replaced, people can't. You do what you have to do to save yourself.

[scared and alone]

Thats the crappy part, they don't really have money either. ugh. this is just a tough situation all around. and i dont think he's going to harm anybody. And i am gonna take my pets itll just be difficult.

[queenFool]

just do it by yourself. be more aggressive about looking for jobs. don't stay with someone who does not want you 100%.

[jul-els]

Thats the crappy part, they don't really have money either. ugh. this is just a tough situation all around. and i dont think he's going to harm anybody. And i am gonna take my pets itll just be difficult.

 

Maybe get a temp job to get enough money to have someone drive out to help you move or use the money to rent a moving truck and drive yourself to where your family is.

[scared and alone]

I really need to do this, I somehow need to find the strength, but I don't know how to. I just wish I didnt love him so much. ugh. screw feelings. Its incredibly hard when, no matter how bad they are for you, you cant imagine your life without them. Even though everyone you know tells you to leave them. AND they are telling you to stay. Ugh I feel so weak. This is one of the hardest thing's ive ever had to do, but I know i need to go through with it, for my sake. I am literally loosing sleep and can't eat over this. It's just killing me. But I just can't stay with a guy that talks to me the way he does. I really don't even know why I love him. He claims he loves me, but he doesn't, not the real me. He wants me the be the version of what he wants, I can't do that to myself. i am not THAT desperate. I love myself how I am. Nobody else has a problem with it, i just wish he wouldn't... THAT is the problem here, but I know he'll probably never see it differently. Thats what is so hard. All this is because of what HE feels he should have. Which is seriously superficial and his own issue, not mine.

[jul-els]

Give your family a call and put the process into motion. You know it's time to leave. Breakups are never easy but you're doing what's healthy for you. Your family will be there for you.

[HoneybflyMm]

Im in your same shoes except my ex has helped me with some cash and finding a place to live. If he really cares about you then he will help if he doesn't get enough money for gas and move to mom until you can get a job and get it together.. trust me I only have a month left on my rent with very little food... I haven't been looking but if I know I was really going to end up in the streets I would look really hard that to worry. Worry is the easy part and it makes things so much harder. Get out their look for work, throw yourself into any job that will pay you something

[braddd]

I live 2,000 miles away from my old life. I am in a tremendous amount of debt with my wife. My immigration status is on the line with our marriage. We're in very similar positions and I also don't know what to do.