She IMd me today

[WillH]

So we did the clean break. She starts dating, and now has a new boyfriend, pretty much a week after we break it off. No contact at all, the way I want it, until two weeks back when we saw each other at a bar. I hadn't been drinking, and she came in with the new guy. At the end of the night, I go over to say hello, and I get a very warm reception from her -- nothing over the top, but a hug to start and a kiss on the cheek to finish, we exchange niceties, etc. The topic of friendship came up, and how we both care for each other and such, but at this point the new boyfriend comes over to us. I shake his hand, introduce, and excuse myself.

 

She leaves and I text her that it was good seeing her and I'm glad she's doing well, and it was nice to start a conversation about going forward in a positive direction. She texts me back the following morning saying that she appreciated me coming over, that she knows it must have been hard (it wasn't), and that she's also glad it looks like it's moving in a positive direction -- basically, she was willing to talk, but that we shouldn't rush things. I agreed and we haven't spoken since.

 

This morning she IMs me while I'm at work through gmail, saying hello and that she "hadn't forgotten that I wanted to speak with her." I told her it wasn't a big deal, she said she didn't want to rush things and I wanted to respect that, and it was whatever she's comfortable with. She responds with this:

 

"it's not that i'm afraid to talk to you or anything, i'm just hesitant about how that may feel to others and that i don't exactly feel like being bffs at this point...obviously i don't expect that's what you want either. i just don't really know what you want to talk about."

 

At this point I'm annoyed and I tell her I just wanted to finish the conversation we had off about moving forward as friends, and whether or not that was possible. But in my head I'm thinking "why bother IMing me and reaching out if you're going to be a snotty byotch?"

 

She ends up not saying anything for about a half hour, and then responds that she didn't want to respond in chat and that she typed out a word document as a response that was mostly gibberish and that she'd send it to me through email. And then signs off.

 

Again -- what the hell did I do? She was the one who reached out to me, but then she makes it out like it's not a big deal to her and gives me attitude?

 

I don't get it.

[HeartGoesOn]

I would think that it's way too early to even attempt to be friends.

 

Also, I find it strange that she has a new boyfriend within a week of breaking up with you. I also think that you should take back your self respect, and not communicate with her as long as she's with this new guy. She may try playing both of you at the same time, and I don't think you'd be happy being that person.

 

Why not go "NC" and try to get your life back together?