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Performance Anxiety


Tw3aks

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I just recently got into a new sexual relationship. I was with a girl for over 2 years before this and she could just kiss me and I would get rock hard. But this new girl, I have trouble getting hard, we've had sex a few times and each time I've never been as hard as I was with the previous girl. And I have to constantly try and keep it up.

 

What can be done about this? She's given me oral and even though it feels great, i still go limp. I don't know if its nervousness or what.

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I work out for 2 hours everyday. It might be some of the supplements I was on (Just got off a 12 week cycle) and this might have caused it, I don't know. I think its nerves and I don't know how to get past them.

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not sure if its' the suppliments...but I had the same issue.

 

I think it's all in your head...cause I remember when this happened..I could get a rock hard erection no problem watching porn, masturbating...whatever, but when it came down to the deed with this girl...I would go limp.

 

Maybe it was because she was so damn sexy and hot...and I felt like I had to live up to all her ex's and ensure that I was the best lay she would ever have! That type of mentality can play games with your member...

 

I think you need to relax...maybe talk to her about it? She can probably help you through this situation...

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how do you solve this? Because my guy is the same ... can come while masturbating to porn but not with a real life busty girl masturbating in front of him ... and definitely not when it comes to the deed itself...

would love to find out why the 'deed' makes him fade away...and what can I do to change it?

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For the mental part of it, leave plenty of time to have sex, relax, don't stress, do it frequently. Let yourself become close to your partner emotionally. I find morning sex worked better for me initially since I was naturally ready to go at that time of day. High test levels in the morning help a lot of guys.

 

I never even worry about anything until I have been having sex with a girl at least several times a week for a good month. Give yourself time to adjust to her and get comfortable.

 

Another big mental trick that really helped me is to not concern myself with whether or not I achieve erection. I find that thinking about it makes it less likely to happen. You can give her great orgasm using your hands and mouth. More time in bed with her should make it more comfortable for you. Letting go of your ego and any negative emotions you may harbor if and when you find you can't perform is incredibly useful. Ego only works against you here.

 

I'd lay off the no explode. Too much caffeine. And if you want to use nitrous oxide for its pde 5 inhibiting effects, just take L-arginine by itself and not with anything else as added ingredients. Erections come easier when you aren't taking things that act as uppers.

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Thanks cardinal for the information. Well last night we hung out and I had been drinking a bit with some buddies prior. But we started making out and I got rock hard, poking her in the stomach with my 45 degrees of fun. We didn't have sex though, but it's pretty evident to me that its all nerves. If I don't think about getting erect, it happens easily. So melissa, to answer your question and my own I think, is to NOT think about it. Tell your man not to let it into his mind. Which is gonna be hard to do, maybe have him drink a bit before so he gets relaxed? It worked great for me, even though alcohol is supposed to make it harder to get erect, its a great relaxation tool to keep your mind off things.

 

I'm attracted to her, but not as much as I was to my old girl. This might be the cause of some of the problem as well, also not as much of an emotional connection.

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