pinkrobot Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 [sorry to those of you who have seen my multiple posts about the whole "I love you" thing lately...I'm just trying to sort out every aspect of this since I'm not used to dealing with it!] But basically, LADIES...are there any of you out there who have been the first to say "I love you" in a relationship, and when you said it the guy actually said it back? Or men, were any of your girlfriends the first to say it and you DID say it back to them? All I've heard are negative stories from the women..."I said it first, but he didn't say it back..." Talk about discouraging. Anyone have an uplifting story? Link to comment
alice1485 Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Well, I can't say I was one of those ladies. My guy said it to me first after we'd been dating for 3 months. I knew I loved him after about two weeks of dating but I didn't dare say it first. My sister, who is a psychologist, said it takes guys much longer than girls to process their emotions about love -- which is why a girl shouldn't say the "L" word first... Link to comment
thejigsup Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 I said it first after about 3 months of dating. He replied with "I'm not there yet, but I'm close." He said it a few months later. Neither of us has said it since. What's the point? We've been together so long we both know how we feel. "I love you" is way overdone in relationships. Link to comment
hayky3126 Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 I said i love you to my ex husband first and he said it back but we were young so im not so sure we were REALLY in love.... Link to comment
pinkrobot Posted April 1, 2009 Author Share Posted April 1, 2009 Alice, I totally understand. My situation's kind of complicated...my past posts have explained it more, but my boyfriend DID say "I love you" 3 months ago (and I said it back) but he hasn't said it since, which kind of voided the fact that he ever said it. Now we've been together 5 months and I really want him to know, but I'm afraid to say it to him "first" because of these discouraging stories I've heard... Link to comment
forever1130 Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 I'm pretty sure I said it first, and from what I remember I didn't even plan on saying it... It just kind of slipped but he said it back so it was all good lol Link to comment
shikashika Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 No the guy has always said it first. Link to comment
sosilver Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 My ex said it first, but he only said it he really felt/meant it....so it wasnt an everyday thing... Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 I said "I love you" first and he said it back. Told me later that he was really happy that I said "I love you" first because he was thinking about saying it for a while and didn't know how. Link to comment
pinkrobot Posted April 1, 2009 Author Share Posted April 1, 2009 I said "I love you" first and he said it back. Told me later that he was really happy that I said "I love you" first because he was thinking about saying it for a while and didn't know how. Can I ask how long you were together before you said it? If you're comfortable answering. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Can I ask how long you were together before you said it? If you're comfortable answering. I actually feel as if I said it way too early. It was my first time saying "I love you" and it was about 3 months into the relationship. However, looking back, I feel as I really didn't know what loving someone meant until about 7 months and even that is rather early. But, at the time, I thought it was love. Turns out it was just the beginning of it. Link to comment
Circe Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 I said it first once. And he didn't say it back. My first "love". I was 16...He said it back eventually. That was a good relationship, it lasted three years and we are still friends. I said it first one other time and he said it back. That was a complete disaster of a relationship and he certainly never loved me. Current relationship? My husband said it first. In the morning. I said it back later that evening. A lot happened in between the morning and the evening to bring down some of my walls. Basically, I don't think it matters (as far as relationship success goes) who says it first or whether it's immediately reciprocated. Link to comment
velvette Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 he said it before we started dating, about 3 weeks after we met? I said it over a month later, the day we started dating. I asked him out when I figured out I loved him. I don't think it's true men take longer to process love. I've read that men fall in love easier/fall out harder, but everyone will have different stories. it just depends on the person, really. but never force it, love will come as it does. Link to comment
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