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watching a close friend be a doormat, advice please


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a close friend that i grew up with has been on/off with the same guy for almost 3 years. they briefly dated maybe for a year combined. she is gorgeous. they haven't been together for almost a year. he does what he wants, she wont sleep with anyone else. she acts like she doesn't care but she isn't living her life. he always tell her "not now i wanna have fun while were in college". and she is just waiting for him. she is a doormat. everyone sees it and she does too but yet she always goes back to him. its sad, i think she is blind. her parents are already split. i feel like she is on a one way street to divorce. i have even seen wonderful guys come into her life recently but she won't do anything until he is gone. i literally feel like he has to kill one of her family members for her to see what an * * * * * * * he is. and all this time he runs around while she waits.


is she in trouble if she continues to wait for him?


what will it take for her to realize he isn't the guy for her? that if he loved her he would respect her.

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I realised eventually. You just do. You wake up one day, whether its one year or ten years down the line. You can only tell her once that you think he isnt good for her because you need to be truthful to her, but she wont leave him because of what you think. But you can be there for her when it does end.

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thats exactly what i was told, that one day she will just realize. i mean this guys has even told her that he does it because its easier.


i recently watched her on a recent trip where a really amazing treated us all on a trip to vegas. she hooked up with him before but when he got too close she backed off. my friends and i all looked at her like what an idiot. this guy did more for her in one weekend than her ex did in his life. we talk to her all the time, she knows it but i just hate watching her life go bye .... unless of course she marrys him and lives happy ever after, which im sure she tells herself

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Heh blinded by love, that can be such a strong thing. It seems that she loves him so much... but yet.. blinded. But when a person is no longer in love their wool over their eyes will fade and they would truly see and realize. I guess some people will have to learn the hard way. But I suggest you continue to help her see what he really his. Always be that supporting friend.

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