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Hi all, this is my second post on this site. It is still about all the same crap from my first post, but had a really bad weekend, so just need some advice/support. Was being emotionally abused by my ex boyfriend. Finally reached the last straw. He did something horrible and I initiated NC for a month. Blocked his e-mail and turned the messaging on my phone off. I weakened after a month and unblocked his e-mail and got the "why are you doing this to me, why are you ignoring me, I don't deserve this" e-mail. I e-mailed him back telling him exactly why (self preservation) and that I will not ever be treated like that again by him. He e-mailed saying he was sorry, will do anything, etc. I told him I didn't feel he could give me what I needed, ie: to be a priority in his life, to be treated with respect and to have God be the focus of our relationship. He replied with "I will do what it takes, but I won't beg and I think you need to change, not me". It just validated the fact that he has not and will not change. I replied "I feel that God has give me the clarity I needed from your response, God Bless". To me this was a nice way of saying a final ](*,)goodbye. He replied by calling me a cold, horrible, inhuman person, saying I never loved him and was just playing games as well as many other words which cannot be typed here. He blamed it all on me. I know I have been hurt and brainwashed, probably more than I realized, because I do still feel like it is my fault, just like I felt everything that went wrong in the relationship was my fault. How do you move on after being emotionally abused and knowing there is no way to have a rational conversation with him to make me feel better. Also, though he said such horrible things I am afraid I may not be rid of him. (This was 2 weeks ago that he sent the e-mail). Any advice, support would be much appreciated.

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You need to continue what you have been doing before, and stick to NC.

 

You will eventually get over this, but you need to be patient and let time runs its course. Whatever you do, do NOT rebound. Allow yourself the time to fully heal, as long as it may take.

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Thanks ezious. You are right and I know what I need to do. I just hate that I feel weak and guilty. It will get better with time. I love your words of wisdom about "setting it free and telling it to "go back to wherever the hell it came from". Very nice.

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