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THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2


SuperDave71
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..

It always is easier when you meet someone else...

 

I agree with you there Misskitty16

 

There have been a lot of things (not connected with exes, etc) that have happened to me since the split, some good, some bad. But it all puts things onto persepctive for me.

 

Everyone here is different and however people choose to get over the heart break, even if it be getting back together, I think we have to be happy with ourselves. It works for me.

 

I'm not sad, angry or bitter anymore. I just told myself that it didn't work and that fine, things happen for a reason. If it's meant to be then it will be.

 

 

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For some reason today was tougher than I expected. I think I realized how much contact we've had for various reasons---not initiated by me but I have been responding. Anyway, I realized how hard it will be to cut off all ties for 30 days and it made me kind of agitated. But I think it's for the best, so I'm in it to win it. No word from him. All in all, I'm off to a good start.

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Already 30+ days only to discover this thread.... oh well, I accept and ready for another 30...

 

Day 1(2nd season)

 

Hmm, something still stuck in my head, sometimes still thinking about sweet moment we had before... and my mind was so stuck today thinking about an incident happened 2 days ago, I spotted my ex current bf cruising by my place just to check her up... Felt some unknown happiness... but glad I'm over it and at least I'm right about nothing that she's a liar...

 

today nothing special, doing things that I usually do over the previous 30 days, I'm used to NC somehow, doing good...

 

Oh ya, I saw my ex's car went by when I was on the way home from jogging, saw another guy(not his current bf) sitting inside her car... O.o well...

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Today's been okay so far. Things are getting busier at work, which is a real blessing. I spent a lot of time thinking about how my reaction to this situation is more about things my father did when I was a kid and less about what bf is doing now. My dad cheated on my mom throughout their marriage and then abandoned my family when I was 6. The shock at bf leaving, the pain of seeing him with someone else, and all the fantasies I've had about winning bf back by being an extra good girl---those are all right out of the playbook I used to cope with my dad. I'm not saying bf didn't do some horrible things. I'm right to be hurt and angry with him. But I have to be careful to separate my reactions to this situation from my reactions to my childhood. I mean, he really just ripped an old wound wide open, but it's still an old wound. Somehow, that makes me feel empowered and more resolved to shut him down. I don't want him back because it was the love of my life. I want him back because I'm used to wanting my dad back. It hurts, but it's familiar, if that makes sense. Anyway, not to get too Freudian here, but I think that's progress.

 

Haven't heard from bf today. Haven't felt like contacting him. It's all good.

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so I'm on day 228 or something. Almost 8 months. She hasn't tried to contact me once. She probably still hates my guts like the poor misdirected c u n t that she is. I still think about her every single day, and I still get sad that it ended on such a bad note. After throwing me under the bus, she bought a house with her fiance and they are literally 'living happily ever after.' This is the guy who she cheated on about 10 times and he took her back after every single time. And in response to her cheating on him, he proposes to her. I thought that in the real world, it's not possible for a relationship like that to flourish... well these two nutjobs are proving the real world wrong.

I feel alot of animosity towards her now. The pain I felt for the first 5 months has died down, but its been replaced by a bitter hatred of her and what she did to me. And I know she feels the same towards me. Sure I haven't talked to her, but I truly sense that 8 months has done NOTHING to cause our animosity to dwindle. I can sense that she still to this day hates me just as much as I hate her. She can rot in hell for all I care. And if I ever see this guy in person I will be MORE than happy to go to jail for remodeling his jaw.

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I'm surprised that I haven't contacted him. But I've wanted to more than a few times.

 

I just get this feeling like I have to fight for this. I have to put up a fight and show how important it is to me that we stay together because he is the one that I want to spend the rest of my life with.

 

Then I realize that he hasn't called me either... and then I get angry.

 

I've been having anxiety attacks in the morning.

 

...I want the pain to go away or for him to call... I guess whichever happens first.

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Day 23 --

 

It's obvious through Facebook that he is dating someone new.

She is not very attractive... but obviously he sees something in her... and she must be better than me because he never offered me committment. I knew this would happen. I was just a fall back girl.

 

It hurts. So much.

 

I deleted him and all of our mutual friends on Facebook.

Doubt he will even notice.

 

I'm crying in the mornings. Every. damn. morning.

 

Please someone tell me it gets better????

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Day 2 (2nd season)

 

YOSH! today is rainy day, but I feel quite good, skipped my class in the morning as usual...

 

We bumped up today at a place (not being planned or contacted before) after being NC for 34 days and just had a simple conservation, nothing else, felt easy and moving.. and i left her within 1 hour... is that considered broken NC???

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Day 2 (2nd season)

 

YOSH! today is rainy day, but I feel quite good, skipped my class in the morning as usual...

 

We bumped up today at a place (not being planned or contacted before) after being NC for 34 days and just had a simple conservation, nothing else, felt easy and moving.. and i left her within 1 hour... is that considered broken NC???

 

Yep it is!

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Day 23 --

 

It's obvious through Facebook that he is dating someone new.

She is not very attractive... but obviously he sees something in her... and she must be better than me because he never offered me committment. I knew this would happen. I was just a fall back girl.

 

It hurts. So much.

 

I deleted him and all of our mutual friends on Facebook.

Doubt he will even notice.

 

I'm crying in the mornings. Every. damn. morning.

 

Please someone tell me it gets better????

 

god im sorry to hear that. ive been there...

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Thanks Coolchick and Jonathan.

 

What hurts even more is the way it ended.

He basically stopped returning my calls and texts... and THATS IT!

After 8 months together. NOTHING.

 

And now I have to see that basically a week later.. he is referring to his new conquest as his "fave girl".

 

I have walked away and am trying to move on... but I think the lack of acknowledgment is what hurts the most.

 

And no Jonathon - I AM the official thread killer on ENA. I swear it happens all the time!! Haha

 

And to both of you -- I think the hatred for your ex is a good thing as this time. The blind angry HATE I have for him is sometimes the only thing that gets me through the day.

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91+ days I believe. There was nothing more a man could do. If she comes back, time will tell. If not, that's just the way it is. If you did all you could do (I did), you can rest your head (I did). Yes, there is not one day that goes by that I do not think of her many many times.

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Day 2... Very short relationship (2.5 months). If I could go NC with my ex of 3 years, I can do it with this loser who played me.

 

LOL I'm going through the same thing almost.. I'm day 1 of NC for this girl who just got done playing me. If I can go NC for 8 months with my ex, I can definitely start ignoring this one.

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Hello, i decided to make the NO CONTACT Challenge... ill explain later my history... The last time i talked to her was yesterday at 10:30pm, and was when we decided things arent going to get better so is the best for me to go away...

 

Day 1:

I feel really sad, because this problem went out of our hands... at the same time i feel like angry because what she had the oportunity to makes things better and she didnt do it... And again sad because our history has ended... or at least for now

 

I deleted her from facebook, messenger, and her number too.

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day 1 of no contact.

 

feeling happy and sad at the time.

 

happy because i got the closure i needed to be able to move on from this.

 

sad because she was my best friend and i'm gonna miss her.

 

for some weird reason we made a date for next week

 

don't know if that's going to work, i still have some stuff to give her.

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21 days now..and nearly gave in today. Did the phone a friend thing and he talked me down. My hissy fit lasted about 4 hours. It was the stupidest, silliest, most insignificant thing ever that threw me..and my reaction tells me NC is still my friend. Thank god it's over. Until the next one!!!!

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Broken up 124 days, 50 days of NC from either side. Early on she kept LC with me and I only replied if there was something that couldn't be avoided, her picking up mail, moving her stuff etc.

 

During these 50 days I haven't been to our church services since it's such a small congregation. On Sept. 13th I'll return which will be 149 days since split and 75 days of NC. That way we will have been in NC for more than half of the total time. I won't approach her at church but it's likely that her son may try to sit with me. I miss church and feel that I need to back there soon regardless of what goes on between us.

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