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THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2


SuperDave71
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Day 11

 

Well my strength and resolve came and went. I was feeling great a few days ago and now I'm right back to missing her and wanting to talk to her... but I don't feel like I "need" her, more like having her around would be a nice addition to my day. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing either or if it means I'm moving on or not. But I do know I need to keep it up for myself so when Miss Right comes around I'll be ready for her whether it is my ex or not. In a way, I don't want her to come back but I do...

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Day 3: Extremely painful, tearing me apart, but I'm proud of myself for resisting all my urges to contact him and making it NC till day 3. I realized today that he is a typical narcissist, all the signs and the red flags were there but I deliberately ignored them because I loved him so much and was in denial. I though he really loved me but now when I think of our relationship its obvious he never did and was only using me for sex and for his ego. According to what I read about narcissists, its not me that has a problem but its him, those people are incapable of love and have no empathy towards others. I just really need to heal and get over him quickly. I feel hurt and crazy, I need my peace back.

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Day 1

i have taken up this challenge as what i do is to visit his fb page everyday . . though we are no longer friends( i deleted him). . . and almost every week i msg him on whatsapp . but this is end of it. as it is flagging down my self esteem. And till now i have strongly believed in myself, my strength. . I love myself and i am not gonna let it happen to me . . . your motivation is a great help guys

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Day 2. Not having to go to the hospital and see her is a blessing. My friend though is still there and his baby is still in danger. I wonder if she left me partly because there are just so many crazy emotions in her life right now. But I definitely feel better each day, as long as I am not in contact. I can't cut her out of my life completely, our circles were too shared, but I hope to eventually get to a point with NC that I no longer need NC.

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Early morning of Day 12...

 

Seems like everywhere I go I'm seeing couples... no matter how busy I stay I can't get her out of my head, I can't even talk to other females, it's annoying... I just keep looking at my phone like I'm expecting her text so I could have someone keep me company while I'm out and about, but alas nothing... I've accepted that she's not coming back, it sucks but she isn't which means it's really time to kick the moving on into gear. My main focus is myself and self improvement, I just wish she could see the progress I made... I always keep my promises, I'm a man of my word even if there's no need to be...

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DAY 17- watched an epic film last night feeling gooood and lots of conversations with my dad about wordly things is really helping to distract me, things are still going well 6 more days till my exam is overrrr yayyayayay I know I shouldn't be wishing any part of my life away but.....I promise to fully make up for it after 6 days Also as a little side note....everyone should try melted chocolate in porridge it's AMAZING! And don't be all skimpy and have skimmed milk o noooo it must be whole truly you will all faint from its tastiness sweet sweet indulgence

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Hey guys, it was Day2 only and i was doing pretty fair. . Until he mdaaged . . Actually he is a family friend too. I work as an RN . . So he messaged me to inquire about his father who is suffering from some medical problem. I thought it would be morally wrong to not to reply. So i replied but afterwards he started asking questions like " hw was my life and he felt bad for me and about spoiling my life " . I somehow ended the conversation. But it returned me to the same point . I am not feeling good about that. Did i do wrong and what to do next ?

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Day 4: Feeling slightly better than the previous days but still aching. Feels like my heart is bleeding. I'm going to allow myself to feel the pain and greive properly so that I get over him more quickly. I just want to be over him fast, can't wait till I no longer care or feel any pain. I guess NC is the only cure for the pain, has always worked for me before so I'm sure it will this time as well.

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Day 1. I have decided to take up this challenge, as of 5 minutes ago i left her an email telling her i accept the break up but only regret we didnt even try to make it work, if you want the whole story i have other posts on that. Even thou i had deleted her off everything, i have finally deleted the friend i had in common with her as that allowed me to see part of her FB page, i had her number written down as back up and ive thrown that away. So as of right now? Any way of me contacting her has been taken away, let the healing begin!

 

Its been 5 days since we broke up, i couldnt even remember what day it was yesterday, i was surprised to learn it was Saturday, i havent been eating much and i keep thinking about all the things we used to do together.

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day 0.

she dropped it on me. told me she didn't want me in her life. being a loser as i am i begged, txted, called, stocked, etc.. did the works! made her feel unsafe, threatened her, etc... lol. no more drinking w/ the boys.

well, time for NC for me.

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Day 14

I was the rebound guy, she said she was all confused and needed space. I agreed and understood. So two weeks went by, and I broke the NC rule. So I started again. So, today is officially day 14 since the second attempt. I have to say, i was getting very desperate there. I always hoped that she would contact me, but never has. I am happy that I accidentally stumbled onto this forum. Your stories are encouraging me to find myself again. This is for me. Thank you.

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Day 3. Even though she was at church. Having to see her at church was awful, just awful. I felt as I left that I was just going to fall on the ground and stay there. But then I ended up having a pretty good day, hung out with my family, and while I still thought about her it wasn't all consuming, and while I still missed her, it wasn't every second.

 

I almost texted her and broke NC, she is going through a lot of stuff right now, which is probably high on the list of reasons she dumped me (I don't know why it makes logical sense to cut off your strongest life line right when things are getting difficult in your life, but it does). I wanted to just send her a nice text saying that I was sorry her life is crap. But then, someone talked me out of it. Why should I feel sorry for her life being difficult right now when her dumping me is one of the reasons. Why should I feel sorry for her life when she ruined mine?

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Day 4-I had a strange feeling when i woke up,i am not feeling that good.I did a mistake by checking him out on fb through my sisters profile.Will avoid that in the future for certainly,but it is soo hart,especially when you write so much on your computer.

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DAY 18 - finding it kind of hard to remember what he looks like!!! Some of the memories are fading too! I mean some I will always remember but..not so easy to think of now..because I guess he's not in my mind so much! I'm feeeeeeelin gooooooood. It will be interesting to see what this weekend and next week is like when I've finished exams and have free time to focus even more on me...a good thing or a bad thing? haha we'll see!

 

What a pleasure to see so many newbiessss (at least I haven't seen a fair few of you before I don't think...) anyway welcome it's a fun journey

Lanaa I thought your sister had changed her password?! haha

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Lanaa I thought your sister had changed her password?! haha

 

i thought that too,i even told her to change it,and she said okay..so i never tried,but today i tried i don't know why,,and she has not!!! hahah.Maybe she forgot

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I think this is my third attempt.. It won't last, I've asked him on a date in two weeks. I'm so confused, he keeps just telling me it's him not me, he doesn't want to try again, he still loves me just doesn't know how he feels.

If he thinks he's confused he should try being me! So I'm trying to give him space until our date. And it's tough, I just need to work on myself and I have no idea how to.

Ah maybe this time I might actually make it to two weeks. Wish me luck...

Day One

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Day 29 - have almost "passed" the challenge but am convinced it is going to be somewhat of an anti-climax, as the point is to make NC such a part of your life that it becomes the norm. The weather certainly hasn't helped my mood and I have been missing her and spending far too much fantasising about what I would say to her if she called or we bumped into each other. My problem is that I am lonely at the moment, but once I start making more friends and doing the things I want to in life, I'm sure I will progress in forgetting about her.

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Day 13

 

Still kind of missing her, but thinking about her less often, I'm more focused on future plans. I seen that she's started calling him names that we called each other and exchanged the I love you and it's been less than 2 weeks since they started being official. Strangely seeing that didn't have the effect on me like I thought it would, I actually smiled a little. But I also read somewhere that the sooner those I love you's start and the sooner the rebound start (5 days after BU) then the sooner the rebound will end. Especially when it looks like she's projecting "me" onto him. What do you guys think? Either way I'm not ready at all to even think about taking her back, the longer this NC goes the more I think about what she had done to me and how she did it. How she broke her promise to me and such. She'll have a hell of a time to get me back if it ever even comes to that with how my luck is it won't ever come. At this point I mostly want her to come back just so I can see what she says, to hear what her poor excuse was to leave me and go to my father and lie to him in his face enough for him to call me over for a talk. I just want to hear what she has to say more than anything at this point, not wanting her back. I still do want to talk to her though, it used to be such a good past time. Well guys, it'll be 2 weeks for me tomorrow, I reached a milestone of sorts, just 2 more weeks to go. I'm also surprised she hasn't tried to contact me at all, for someone that hated me giving her her final gift (It was already ordered and shipped when she broke up with me, it was just simply another charger for her laptop since she lost the previous one) she sure hasn't made any attempt whatsoever to return it to me or even drop it off with my dad. Guess she really is selfish.

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DAY 1 Of No Contact And Day 1 of The Rest Of My Life

 

Well after 4 1/2 years of on and off including a short marriage of 15 months I know now that I have to let go.

It hurts me to know that every time we get back together. Nothing ever changes with her. I lover her to bits but a relationship is a 2 way thing. Its about giving and receiving things like, love, respect, honesty. and understanding.

I know its me that's always the one that gets back in touch. but it has to end today

last night was the final straw, I felt totally used

The anger I am feeling is astronomical, not just about the way she treats me but also how her family and friends don't like me all based on the attention seeking untruths told

I do hope that there is a future but I have no hope she will change. This time its up to her but only if she can change . I hold out no hope of her calling texting or anything so if she can not be bothered to make the effort. THEN WHY SHOULD I

 

Message to self.

leave the booze alone so no drunken text

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27 Days of no contact, broke it over the weekend. To tell my ex to stop contacting my family especially my mother and father through text.

 

It must not be working out with his new girlfriend, but I will not give him the satisfaction of hearing my voice or letting him know how I really feel.

 

I am doing this for me. Staying away from you and not talking to you. I don't want you in my life anymore. So just try to find a way to let go of me.

 

I am doing my best and you are not going to hurt me anymore.

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