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THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2


SuperDave71
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Day 18

I have figured out that he was simply more sexually attracted to this other woman than me. Hard to blame him for that. Any other guy in his shoes would have probably done the same thing. She's 15 years younger than me and I believe a former escort. It doesn't matter how amazing our connection was. My guess is that he'll be back once the novelty wears off. I predict it will be in mid to late May. I'm not sure I'll want to get back together with him, even though I miss him terribly right now.

 

Before the second threesome, our relationship was at its absolute best. I was head over heels for this guy and the feeling seemed to be mutual. I had boudoir photos taken on the afternoon of the threesome. I'm so glad I did because they turned out phenomenally well. I was so happy, passionate and in love at the time and the expressions on my face are amazing. I was imagining that the camera was him. So glad I captured that because I doubt I will ever look that way again.

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just returning to throw my 2cents in here... NC worked wonders for me, keep it up guys and girls. It's incredibly painful, I cried myself to sleep many a time, but it gets better, I promise. Use the time to work on YOU, do it for YOU, not THEM. Stay strong and don't get tempted to break it until you know you're ready!

 

i'm taking this back completely. sorry guys and girls, but my wife used NC to have an affair on me, and I feel like such a fool that while I was healing and trying to be a better man, she was getting closer to another man, and I blame myself for allowing her the time and space to allow this to happen almost as much as I blame her for seeking comfort in another.

 

NC will help you personally, I can attest to that, but there is an insanely huge risk that it will do the opposite for your relationship.

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broke NC AGAIN yesterday! but i had to it was driving me crazy, sent her a message telling her i am going out of my mind and i have to break all contact with her, she replied, saying she understood, and then she went about deleting my fb twitter, got rid of my number on her phone, email, everything, that's it, and i feel terrible the worst i have felt, these weeks and months are going to be painful. i love you so much

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Day 22

 

I woke up with a text from New Guy. It made me feel nauseous. I'm trying to force myself into the dating scene, but no one measures up to you. I wish you wouldn't have pulled me in and made me believe all your lies. I am so messed up emotionally now.

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Not sure what day I'm on. 21? 22? Doesn't matter. My interest and hopes for reconciliation are dwindling. I would still be open to it but I'm not going to chase, or even hope. I have too much going on and too much to look forward to to be thinking about someone who doesn't want to be with me. I made my mistakes and admitted them to you, I never did anything intentionally, you should have communicated with me instead of holding everything in and then breaking up. I treated you like an angel, your loss not mine. Despite these words I hold no resentment towards you. I just want to find someone who wants and appreciates my love.

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Day 3 round 2, 34 days since break up. Starting lose count though, I had to recalculate. I hooked up with a girl this weekend. I think it may have made me feel worse initially. I felt more distant from her than I have yet. Not sure it was the smartest thing to do either.

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Day 12:

 

People on this site say that you have to realisticly wait anywhere from 3-8 weeks to see any type of results(contact from the ex). I hope that's the case because the last 3 days were pretty hard for me to handle even though I kept all my emotions inside. The first 9 days were cake because I want this whole situation to be over. Now I just miss her and I know that our future may not ever intertwine again(I really hope I'm wrong).

Edited by Jondwnr
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this is so hard! iv had a terrible day! the worst, i feel ill.

the past few weeks have been bad, but she was always there, and there was abit of hope, and comfort in that! but its all gone now, finished, i have no hope, when i realized it my stomach sank and iv felt like that since, i wont sleep tonight!

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well it would be very unlikely thats for sure, iv been a sad pathetic mess since the split, im sure shes glad to be rid of that side of me! we will see, i just gotta get through this and get back to my old self before there is any chance of anything with anyone . when it rains it pours though, it will take time, iv had alot of things come my way iv gotta deal with aswell as this.

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Yeah very true, you have to fix yourself(emotionally at the very least) before even starting to do anything with her.

It took men's good 3 weeks of craziness before I was good enough to leave her alone.

When it rains it pours is right! Breakups usually have in the most inopportune times.

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Day 1 of NC:

Last night I told her to stop contacting me, only to get bombarded with calls and texts asking why I was doing that. I didn't respond to any of it. I will not be there for her emotionally while she has another guy. Let him deal with all of that. Since she is definitely in a rebound that is very likely to fail, I refuse to aid her transition in any way.

 

Don't talk to me unless you want to talk reconciliation. Until then, enjoy not having me in your life despite the fact that you claim you "don't want to lose me as a friend." And by the time you come back (if you do at all), I may be gone for good. I am not waiting for you.

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Day 1

ex bf broke up with me on this past friday (3 days ago). I emailed him today to let him know that I agree w/ the break-up and that it's for the best (I actually don't agree w/ it). I want to win my ex-back. I miss you and love you so much, but you left me! you broke up w/ me over the stupidest thingss!!! maybe you weren't serious about us. idk.

any ways, day 1 starts today!

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day 2

today i have done something i needed to do! since the split, 3 weeks ago! besides still talking to her, i didnt delete her FB or twitter, but shes done that for me now! but i have loads an loads of pictures of her and us together on my comp, and videos, and emails, and letters, and i have been looking at them, which looking back was silly, but i thought i could cope, they were probably making it worse, so i have put it all on to a dvd, deleted it all, gather all the pictures, anything that reminds me of her, given it to my sister and told her to keep it all. its not the time to be looking at any of that, because i cant do it fondly, think of the good times and smile about it and the love we shared. it makes me sad, and angry and jealous, makes me want to ring her up, hear her voice.

 

had nothing planned today, but i cant dwell so i am off out and getting active, bit of exercise and find something to keep my occupied and positive

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Day 19

 

Feeling worse every day since about last Friday. I probably feel the worst that I have since the break-up. I think I was in shock and denial before. Not helping that I can't seem to sleep more than 5 hours a night. Also, I have been calling a psychic a couple of times a week but that's not helping me either. She's telling me things that I don't want to hear, like that he's feeling more positive now and feels good about his new relationship.

 

Sinking in that I was so stupid to agree to a threesome with a hot single 26 year old. But like I said I feel like it was all meant to happen. And I wanted to prove that I was totally secure about myself and the relationship.

 

Hate having all these images in my mind of him having sex with her. The rest of you try not to imagine your ex with the new person but I can't avoid the pictures. It is a bummer.

 

I need to forget about him and move on but he's on my mind every minute of the day. Yes, I can throw myself into work but he's still at the back of my mind.

Edited by wilyone 11
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Day 19 post 2

 

Hard to imagine anything more painful (from a romantic perspective) than being totally in love with someone, at the peak of the relationship, and watching them make passionate love to someone hotter and sexier than you and dump you for the other person.

 

Most dumpees try hard not to imagine their exes being intimate with the new person. I can't escape the images.

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Round 2 Day 4, I had a dream last night that it was our wedding night and you looked at me while we were lying in bed as to say you'll love me forever. I guess that will probably never happen now. Ironically I was woken up by another girl texting me she had to cancel our lunch date for today because she got called in to work and wanted to reschedule for Friday.

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Day 2

Mr.Flirt is texting me good morning..and I was going through a rough time. Some good friends were around to calm me down.

I got a job interview call..for a secretary job..from a cute young lawyer. He added me on Facebook as well. His office and residence is in an upscale area of the city.

Mr.Lawyer wants to meet me for lunch sometime next week for interview. He's single, young and handsome. Not to mention successful. But I still think about you.

 

I accidentally clicked on the secret folder on my phone and saw our pics. I really miss you.

My best friend was online today and told me that she feels..you will contact me again..in the future.

Right now during NC, my target is to make money. I want to save up money for a holiday on a beach resort island.

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im starting to get angry with my self now! im making my self worse, iv got some work to do on the computer and i KEEP going on her fb and twitter, even though i cant see what shes putting and its annoying me, i see that her friend count has gone up, and for some silly reason that annoys me, i cant see her tweets but i can see ones replied to them, and they make me angry, there from what i can tell about hot men shes spotted! GRRRRRRRRR! im off out find something else to occupy my time. so pathetic, i need to show some self control

Edited by wcl
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im starting to get angry with my self now! im making my self worse, iv got some work to do on the computer and i KEEP going on her fb and twitter, even though i cant see what shes putting and its annoying me, i see that her friend count has gone up, and for some silly reason that annoys me, i cant see her tweets but i can see ones replied to them, and they make me angry, there from what i can tell about hot men shes spotted! GRRRRRRRRR! im off out find something else to occupy my time. so pathetic, i need to show some self control

 

Dude you HAVE to delete facebook if necessary.

Trust me...do it.

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DAY 32

 

Yeah, my 30-day challenge ended 2 days ago, but I'm still truckin' on. I'm sure she's moved away by now, so the ball's in her court as far as getting in touch. I really wonder if her rate of trying to contact me will rise or fall once she's living near/with her new guy. It'll be interesting to see.

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Day 45

 

It's been 45 days since I last saw you and you took me to dinner and spent the whole night playing mind games with me. You even asked me if you should pursue this new girl you met who was the total opposite of me. It's been three weeks since you texted me drunk asking why I hadn't come out to drink with our mutual friends, then telling me that I wasn't answering because I was probably too busy with my new guy, you then ended your drunk texts by telling I was too good for everyone except for you. You then apologized the next day for texting me and said it wouldn't happen again.

 

This past week has been a bad one for me. I was doing so good and all of a sudden I miss you! I want to call you and hear from you but I know I can't!!!! Ever since you broke up with me I haven't initiated any contact Why should I do it now??? I'm better than this.

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suspended my facebook account, told my mates on their they can contact me by phone! feels good. i havnt got much to do at the moment, so keeping busy is hard, but it allows me to think alot! and i gotta say, the love i have for you amazes me! i have never been this tormented, and when things have settled down how ever they turn out, i will have some great memories and feelings for you that i wont ever forget

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