Jump to content

THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2


SuperDave71
 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 20.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Day 1 here we go.

 

We broke up three weeks ago today. Things have been alright until today, I broke down and begged my ex to see me today. She got very angry because I kept begging. I deleted her number and am going to try my hardest to do this. Hope this works.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

no its not wrong she is the mother of your baby and you want to be in their life and not jus as some kind of sperm donor. her parents may be the grand parents but you are the FATHER...kinda trumps them

 

sometimes you have to kinda play these games and showing her you crawl wont make her respect you and it wont serve any purpose in the long run cos peeps cant love truly who they dont respect.

 

youre a father now, a man, so lets see what ya made of

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1 here we go.

 

We broke up three weeks ago today. Things have been alright until today, I broke down and begged my ex to see me today. She got very angry because I kept begging. I deleted her number and am going to try my hardest to do this. Hope this works.

 

i would normaly say from my own experience of being an nc initiator and being on the recieving end of nc that if youve broke up quite well (is there such a thing?) then say that youre doin nc and its not that you dont care or hate em blah blah

 

in your case now that shes angry yeah best thing you can do is dissappear off the face of the earth...block fb and msn and all the rest of it and give her some space. me and my ex split 3 weeks ago too and cos i ave him space part from saying i let him go, he text me and things ended on a psoitive note

 

so let her emotions cool and dust settle and read up on this fabulous site

Link to comment
Share on other sites

no its not wrong she is the mother of your baby and you want to be in their life and not jus as some kind of sperm donor. her parents may be the grand parents but you are the FATHER...kinda trumps them

 

sometimes you have to kinda play these games and showing her you crawl wont make her respect you and it wont serve any purpose in the long run cos peeps cant love truly who they dont respect.

 

youre a father now, a man, so lets see what ya made of

 

i know you arnt really a solicitor ( or are you haha )

 

but i made an appointment to go see mine today

for thursday.

 

as a father am i entitled to access ( i am named on birth certificate )

 

and does this access have to be on there terms or is at a third partys terms that we come to an agreement using?

 

just trying to give myself as much ammo and armour as poss

 

thank you!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1 here we go.

 

We broke up three weeks ago today. Things have been alright until today, I broke down and begged my ex to see me today. She got very angry because I kept begging. I deleted her number and am going to try my hardest to do this. Hope this works.

 

Ya, begging is a killer.Its the worse i think to a women.Now you have no choice but to never call her back.No communications of any kind.She might get in touch with you one day after she realizes you have changed for the better.You need to work on yourself.Conversations are much better than arguments.You need to keep very busy.Go out with friends,even date other women.If she finds out you are with another one,it might shake her a litle thinking you are totaly over her ! Moving on is the only way to get a stable life.Stay away from her so she can have a chance to miss you.I agree that you should delete her from your pc and everything else.Keep nothing around you that reminds you of her.I've been there,4 months now and i feel a lot better.The further you are away from her the greater it is.You need to let her go to obtain a chance of getting her back.She might show up in a few months or never.Just be ready.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dont you worry,his turn will come.One day he will find a women that will give him nothing but the third degree.

 

I think it's more like I'm sad with how things ended... I tend to over dramatize things sometimes. I'm hoping that when the 6th month mark comes up, that I'll be able to clear the air with this guy.

 

I'd be lying if I said I'd be in for a big disappointment if he gets nasty again once I break NC soon...

 

Sigh.

 

my ex actually said that to me...that he was only using me for company and sex...such charmers....and guess what...nearly 3 year later he expressed regret at not trying hard enough with us. Mind he was a narcisscist so his words meant nowt

 

see you showed love and so if he wanted to screw you over with that then thats his prob for being a d*ck...not yours

 

Thanks honey and I'm sorry about your ex. He sounds crazy!

 

DAY 158/159

 

WOW...

 

phenominal!

you seem to be doing very very well!

 

theres a few peoples storys on here that give alot of hope!

but day 159, wow lol! i kinda hope by then me and the ex can get on like adults should, especially for our daughters sake!

 

take care! good luck

 

Hey thanks! It wasn't easy but I did it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i know you arnt really a solicitor ( or are you haha )

 

but i made an appointment to go see mine today

for thursday.

 

as a father am i entitled to access ( i am named on birth certificate )

 

and does this access have to be on there terms or is at a third partys terms that we come to an agreement using?

 

just trying to give myself as much ammo and armour as poss

 

thank you!!

 

well i do my own research on the law....did you know that council tax is unlawful

 

did you know that MR JOE BLOGGS is a legal fiction and not actually Joe the human being??

 

in court its all about acting in honour and dishonor... the judge dont wanna kna about the tiffs you had or who said what... if she or her family make unreasonable demands...you say "i conditionally accept that, but my conditions are these..."

 

it will look good in your favour cos youre acting in honor and get them controlling grandparents off ya back

 

try link removed - you will be amazed at the scams in the LEGAL system (legal is diff to lawful btw)

 

;P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

well im back, its been around 7 months NC for me now. there isnt a day where i still dont think about her. i hope everyone is doing ok here! i know how tough it is to let go, i still havent 7 months on.

 

Get a new gf and you will ! Some are still in the same situation even 2 years later.Love can be so strong...giving up all hopes is the way to go.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 1

 

I am going to take this challenge, even if this will start to hurt a lot and the impulse is still big. But I know if I keep up with the challenge I will become stronger. In front is the way! Despite how much I want you, now I want you out of my mind, or at least to fade away.

 

Broke up one month and a half ago and last time we spoke was two weeks ago. He has a new gf. I dont want to be his friend or know anything about him and his relationship.

 

Have kept in mind NC now! Now trying to get some sleep!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

day 2 or 3. im freaking out. have good reason to never be in contact again (see other posts). And absolutely believe it now- but god I'm aching. I know it's an addiction.. It's as if it's a withdrawl. I have to remember the first few days are the hardest. I have to keep going. Now is when I would usually contact. But this time- it's real. reason for both of us to cut ties and move on. not just because its the right/healthy thing to do- but because it's the only thing to do. I would normally email some rant....to him about missing him, etc.. instead im writing here. It really is just some need/void to feed. I hope it passes. I know all the rights and wrongs- its a matter of abiding...to get myself a better life......

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 week mark.

 

Never have I had 21days be so torturous with so many emotions, so many switches of ups and downs, so many feeling of progress then completely regress, in my entire life.

 

I made myself a goal of not looking him up at least for a week but I have always failed. I then found a post, by a brave someone, that was so close to my situation that I began to cry all over again and I broke, I went and looked him up. But the responses also made me cry more because they were so warm and caring. They helped/reminded me to set my goal again and keep setting it until I can complete it. All the posts/responses/relies show me, even though I am still feeling so lost, I'm not alone here.

Sorry, emotional moment there.

I just want to be over him so badly.

...single tear sigh...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 9 of NC Day 16 of NIC... last night i dreamt that i called her to ask if she was mad at me or something and she was being so mean to me! i remember thinking 'oh my god i should not have never called, why did i call, i didnt even want to call, im going to be so set back... please let this be a dream..." then in my dream i actually though "maybe this is a dream..." then i woke up and i was sooo relieved that it was a dream because i dont want to call her! I mean, of course I do wonder sometimes what she's doing, but there's no way I'm calling any time soon and if I do find myself wondering about her I try to switch the subject back to all the possibilities I have now that I didn't have when I was in a relationship. Focus on the positive!

 

Then I dreamt about this cute guy i met... then later before waking up i dreamt that i called her again!! so needless to say, i woke up feeling a little sluggish but i am trying to pick myself back up. so far i notice that happy days and blah days are alternating back to back.

 

Edit: Although I had a few good days, today I am feeling pretty low and down. I am pining over her a bit. Not that I want her back, but just feeling the loss hard again.

Edited by kvb10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

To every one here who finds NC very tough,i agree with you all.Is there another option better than this one ? Absolutely not ! Its the only way to regain control of ourselves and our lives.Staying in touch with the ex when you have been rejected is ridiculous ! Their is no other choice,no one has ! Trying so hard to get them back gives the opposite effect ! NC is the only way to get out of that miserable situation.That position could be short or endless.If the ex start contacting again,you could find yourself in the winning position.That means you can become the dumper ! No one has to accept the return of the ex.We are in a state of panic once we are cast aside,thats only natural.Every one here will go for the roller coaster ride,but it will end.Healing can be short or extended,its our choice ! Life goes on with or whitout them ! The less you communicate with them, the faster you will get over it.Who in his right mind would have a desire to stay in touch with a manipulator using you as a crutch ? NC gives you the power to react and efficiently. You need to become the person you were before you met the ex.Using your will power,self esteem and pride will get you over the rut.I personally give 5 stars to the NC after 4 months.Im finally becoming my own self after a short stay in hell.No,the world doesnt rotate around the EX !

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 5

 

Getting harder He is ignoring me right back. I deleted him from my facebook this morning because I couldn't stop checking it. He was adding ex-girlfriends and I don't know if he was trying to get under my skin, or what. But I'm not going to torture myself by having to look at his updates, nor am I going to allow him to peek into my life and know what's going on with me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

ANd I can't stop checking my email, either!!!!

 

In fact, I'm going to delete my email address RIGHT NOW!! Enough of this!

 

Stay away from him.As you can see hes playing with your feelings.NC and ignore him completely.Show what you can do whitout him and dont let this get to you.Hes very immature to act that way.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 3 Round 2

 

So yeah, after 33 days of NC, she called and text me last Saturday so I met with her and she told me how she dumped her boss (who she left me for back in November) because she still loves me. But she wants to be single for now because she doesnt know what she wants and needs time to sort her feelings out. She wants to hang with both of us just as friends (yeah right) in the mean time. She had me going that night and we flirted and kissed alot. That had me thinking that she is likely doing the same thing with her boss. So after taking a few days to weigh my options, I've decided its back to NC I go and I wont break it again until she comes with a clear cut decision. I figure this way, I cant screw up by saying or doing anything to assure her I'm plan B, so that she can wonder where I went, and so I can keep trying to get over this b.s.. Last time, I told her I was going NC. This time, even though we last talked on good terms, I'm just gonna disappear.

Edited by syxx87
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share


  • Top Discussions this Week

  • Our picks

    • 3 Simple Strategies To Ditch The Imposter Syndrome
      Have you ever felt like you're a fraud who doesn't belong? According to a recent article published in the International Journal of Behavioral Science, seven in every ten people have or will experience impostor syndrome at some point in their lives. We couldn't see our tribe suffering from this anymore, so we brought in the person who'll help you ditch this feeling for good. In this video, peak performance expert Shadé Zahrai joins Vishen to discuss how to supercharge your life and improve your self-esteem by constructing your own reality, leveraging your self-awareness, and regaining control over your inner critic

       
      • 0 replies
    • 5 Things People Who’ve Been Mentally Abused Do
      Do you know how common mental abuse is? According to The National Center for Biotechnology Information, 80 percent of the population has experienced some form of abusive relationship and behavior. However, despite how frequent it is, emotional abuse is still hard to spot. Unlike physical abuse, mental abuse doesn’t leave any visible scars; instead, it affects someone’s behavior, mindset, and mentality. This means some people deny they’ve been mentally abused, and others may not even recognize the toxic behavior. So, whether you’re reading this to be able to recognize emotional abuse in others or recognize it in yourself, these a few things people who’ve been mentally abused do are sure to help you be more empathetic and kinder.

       
      • 0 replies
    • 5 Polarity Secrets to Attracting Love that Makes you Magnetic AF
      In this video, I'm going to show you the 5 most powerful ways to create polarity in order to attract love. Think of it like a magnet. If you have a magnet, it is going to attract, but also repel based on its polarity. If you have a positive and a positive and you put them together, guess what's gonna happen? They're going to repel each other. Same with a negative and negative. But when you have a positive and a negative, they clink right like this. The key to attracting love is embodying your own sense of polarity, which really is the authenticity of who you really are, letting go of what you are not so that you can attract love easier than ever. These are things that completely transformed my own life.

       
      • 0 replies
    • 10 Signs You Are Fake Happy
      Are you happy, or are you putting on a fake smile? Fake happiness can be hard to detect, but if you know the signs you can spot it.

       
      • 0 replies
    • Do You Gaslight Yourself?
      Do You Gaslight Yourself?
      • 0 replies
×
×
  • Create New...