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What does this mean? :(


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I would really like some input on a situation between me and my boyfriend, if anyone has any.


We've been going out for 2.5 years and have been long distance for about ten months (seeing each other once every three months). I know things can be different at first when you haven't seen each other in awhile. In fact, that has happened before, where for the first few minutes or hours, we both felt almost nervous.


But this most recent time last week... I felt like he was a stranger. I can't even explain it. When he tried to kiss me, my instinct was to back away, even up to hours after I initally picked him up. It didn't feel familiar at all. It started out just the normal nervousness and then as it went longer on, we both became concerned about it. He felt pretty much the same as always, he said, but I just felt like I didn't know him. We were together 2 1/2 days. By the end of that time, I felt more comfortable around him and things felt superficially normal... but-- it's hard to describe-- it felt like he could have been anyone (though still a person I care about), not the person I love in a special way. Believe me, I was not expecting butterflies or had any overzealous expectations, so it wasn't a case of having too high expectations. This struck me completely by surprise.


This is going to be long, sorry... As I thought about it more after he left, I realized that things have been different in the 2 1/2 months since we last saw each other. We've been dealing with the distance SO much better. We fought a lot in the summer and fall and in this span, we barely fought. We were getting along well, I thought. But... I used to send him text messages that said, "I love you" just because I had a surge of love for him. I can't remember sending him one. I used to send him a card every month to mark an occasion no matter what and I remember thinking last month, "Eh, I'll see him soon, it doesn't matter." If we had an argument in the past, I used to be upset until we made up. Now, I feel like I can just do my homework and go to sleep undisturbed. Little things used to remind me of him, and I used to remember nice things about him and our relationship. Now I can barely remember thinking about him unprompted except for practical things.


He is coming to visit me again soon, for a week or so this time, so I hoping things will be better then. We will be LD for another five months and then together on a mostly daily basis for 9 months and then we MAY be LD again after that.


What does this mean? Has it just been a long time since we've been able to spend an extended period of time together? Are my feelings changing?

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Has something like this ever happened to anyone else?


He is visiting me again... and already I can see that this is going to be stress-filled and not a time of really getting relaxed around each other again. We are both swamped with work, and it's all he talks about constantly. Some days I think I just can't stand to hear him talk about it for one more minute. Just needed to vent...

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When He Says He Wants Space | Begin...
When He Says He Wants Space | Beginner's Guide


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