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Love Is Like The Wind - You Can't See It, But You Can Feel It


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Over and over again, your mind begins the "dance". The music plays softly in your head as the images of yesterday play like a swooning symphony and you are the conductor. The thoughts of the past plague you at home, work, and even while trying to accomplish mundane tasks such as taking out the trash.



Thoughts of "they were standing right there...I remember he/she kissed me while I was making dinner". Concentration seems to falter a bit as you grasp so desperately to hold onto the last happy moment you had with your ex. The corners of your mouth only curl when you think of the last happy memory of holding their hand, a simple hug, a gentle kiss or making love. Sadly, we snap out of it and we are flooded with emptiness once again.



The Questions


When am I going to start feeling better?

When am I going to want to smile again?

Why did they do this to me?

Why can't I just go out with someone new?

Will I ever fall in love again?

Am I too difficult to date?

If they don't want me...who will?

What's wrong with me?



These are the most common questions people ask themselves after a breakup. Regardless of the circumstances, we all want answers. Sometime we need to accept the fact that their aren't any....for now. As I have always said, the more you push something...the bigger the chance to break it. If you hold onto something too tightly, it could crumble or break in your hands. Everything about you matters. The way you feel right now is so common, but the difference is that IT IS HAPPENING TO YOU.

Heartbreak in plain English is disappointment to the millionth degree. I am not talking about not getting your way, I am referring to your plans. You know exactly what I mean.



Let's define...




Plans are when you know you are in love and you start thinking as "WE" rather than "I".



You can beat yourself up all ya want over this one but it will only make you feel worse. I used to think of my plans as a brick to a castle. When things were going great, I would add a brick in my mind. How did I know to add a brick? Simple really. See if you can relate to this. You and your ex were in a crowded room. Everyone is mingling and having a great time but you both are not side by side. You and your ex are in separate places of the room. You glance at your ex to check on them and they look at you while talking to someone else and "wink" at you. THAT is EXACTLY what I mean. It's that feeling of "no one matters as much as you do"

regardless of how many people are here. Does that make sense?



With that said, I am 36 years old. This experience has not only happened once in my life. It has happened MANY times. Its not ONE person. It has been many that have come in and out of my life. I can remember many times where I thought, "this is the one" but I am here to tell you...I am still single by choice.



Life is what you make it. If you want to live your life in regret and the past, that is your choice. My heart hurts too sometimes. I have been there. Its the PAIN that is different. If I hit my thumb with a hammer it would hurt but you wouldn't feel it obviously. BUT, if you hit your thumb you would hurt but to what degree? Would you hurt worse or less? The point is, we both hurt. It's how we deal with the pain that matters. You could shake it off. You could wrap it up. You can tell others you were hurt. You could tell the hammer you were hurt ( Silly eh?) You could ask the hammer "why did you do this to me?" but nevertheless the PAIN is what matters.



We all want the last word. When we hurt, sometimes we want the thing or person that hurt us to hurt right back. We can stick our tongues out and name call all ya want but what does it solve? In my opinion, it proves that you are childish and want to be right about a situation that is neither right or wrong.



Just because you ex isn't there, doesn't mean that they stopped loving you. Don't get me wrong, I am not about to say HOW much they do...but just know that they do. If you both did nothing to hurt the other and things weren't working out after several tried attempts, walk away. Hold your head up high and love them as you walk away. It happens every day. Show them that you can handle anything. Sometimes we just need a break to learn to value what we already had.



Breaking up doesn't always have to be final. Be sure handle what happens after a breakup just as you did when you were together. To go crazy and name call, text, email or become a stalker...ONLY PROVES THAT WHAT THEY DID WAS 100% RIGHT! Be careful out there..



Just because the person is gone..doesn't mean the love isn't there.





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i broke up many times with my bf to the extend that when it happens again, i no longer want the last word. from this forum and from you superdave, i learned to handle break up "gracefully", even if i had to act it out. this really helps in patching up later, because i didn't act crazy or mean or rude during breakups to add to the hurt.

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  • 1 year later...
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You


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