shy2cool Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 Not in the sense of appearance. I do think I can attract women based on my looks, but besides that, I don't think I am all that 'attractive'. For example, the other guys from my work seem to be funnier, better conversationalists and more knowledgeable than me about 'normal' everyday topics. I feel a bit jealous at times and feel as though women won't give me any chance because there are better options out there. Sorry guys, just feeling a bit sour at the moment. Link to comment
top bloke Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 This is interesting...you see ..I believe that we are all unique and that some intelligent sexy woman will notice you for the individual that you are. Cheer up man...a smile can work wonders for you.. You are not those other guys....your different...dare to be and watch the pulses race .... Link to comment
dr_styles Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 Funny, I feel the exact opposite. (although my personality is more "untested" than confirmed good) Link to comment
iamtrying Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 U can always work on yourself in those areas. Watch alot of comedy shows like south park/family guy/seinfeld etc..U could also try looking for resources on google, on how to be funnier. I have looked it up at one point and there's stuff out there to help. Read books on how to hold better conversations, there's heaps of free ebooks out there to help. And for general knowledge just read the paper everyday, and read random articles. Watch the discovery channels about history,travel etc.. All you need to do is read and practise and you'll improve alot. And your confidence will grow in those areas as well! Do u really want to improve in these areas? Link to comment
iamtrying Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 Do u think this could help? It could be your own personal project. It'd be kinda fun too. Or is there a bigger problem at play? Link to comment
janderson83 Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 "I don't think I am all that 'attractive'." There is your first big problem right there. If you don't think you are attractive, how is a women suppose to find you attractive? The first thing is to change your attitude. You need to gain confidence in yourself. Women (and men) can detect when someone is uncomfortable and not confident. It is VERY obvious and most women (and men) are not attracted to a lack of confidence. So, I suggest you fully embrace who you are...say SCREW THESE GUYS AND GIRLS, and just start talking to women. Everywhere. Seriously! Just start talking. If you creep them out, oh well. Next! Eventually you'll find one that is for you, that appreciates YOU. As said above, you don't want average, run of the mill girls...(Who many of them are mindless drones of society. They only care about who is on the next American Idol...) So, hold your shoulders up high, embrace who you are, smile and be confident. You would be amazed at how quickly your success rate will increase. Link to comment
laisla Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 oh come on i bet you are hot. smile more and have a good sense of humour. Link to comment
sweetdslollipop Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 just have confidence! it will solve all of your problems Link to comment
shy2cool Posted March 27, 2009 Author Share Posted March 27, 2009 Thing is, I *do* portray myself as being confident when speaking to people. I never accept it when people try to talk me down - unless they are joking of course. Link to comment
LemonCheesecak Posted March 27, 2009 Share Posted March 27, 2009 Thing is, I *do* portray myself as being confident when speaking to people. I never accept it when people try to talk me down - unless they are joking of course. I empathise. But can I ask, do you ever feel as if you don't have any single striking aspect to you as an individual to attract someone in the first place? I feel like that's my problem. Link to comment
shy2cool Posted March 28, 2009 Author Share Posted March 28, 2009 I empathise. But can I ask, do you ever feel as if you don't have any single striking aspect to you as an individual to attract someone in the first place? I feel like that's my problem. I guess what sets me apart kinda is that I have geeky hobbies, but enjoy being social and out having fun. Not much, I know. Link to comment
Goincrazy Posted March 28, 2009 Share Posted March 28, 2009 Well I'm not sure how you can train yourself to make drastic changes to your personality, but I think one good thing to try and do is to stay positive. I'm the kid in class that always talks, makes jokes, and gets worked up about little things...in good ways. A lot of people find my energy and enthusiasm about life contagious and fun to be around. Even if I don't land the girl, I'll definitely get their attention. I look for people that try to find fun in anything they do, and I'm assuming most others look for the same thing. Just be positive and some good fortune is bound to go your way. Link to comment
Bartok Posted March 28, 2009 Share Posted March 28, 2009 I'm the kid in class that always talks, makes jokes, and gets worked up about little things...in good ways. Ah, so you're the guy who gets all the attention in the group, so that the quieter folks just kinda hang back and don't say anything That's where I am right now. I do OK in groups, but everyone else just talks so much more than I do, and I just can't get a word in - that is, by the time I actually come up with something to say. Sometimes I feel like dead weight in the group. Maybe I'm just too polite, and should just interrupt when I feel the need to say something. The only way I can talk as much as everyone else is if I'm more drunk than they are Link to comment
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