Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone

 

I know this will be a long read but if you have the time i would be much appreciated if you guys could help me out and help me get some closure.

 

ok. I just got out of a long distance relationship with a girl i Loved dearly, Loved being the key word here as she completely changed towards the end. we used to live together for a short amount of time but she had to go back to canada to be with her mother and finish study over there. My mother gave her ring to my ex just to show that we were committed towards each other. we were madly in Love, we were going to plan out marriage, plan our future and everything was fantastic!. she went back to canada, and i was supposed to move to canada with her in 3 months time after is saved some money. anyways 2 months later things started to change, she became distant, she wouldnt txt as much, wouldnt call as much, and that would go on for a month. she was always up and down, one second she was all lovey and the next she was distant, it really used to screw with my head. One day we had a argument because she didnt answer her phone for like 3 hours, i just had a car accident and i was a nervous wreck, she finally picked up the phone and we had a masive argument over why she wasnt answering. after that day she said she has doubts and said she couldnt handle an long distance relationship and she doesnt know if she wants to be with me, I was hurt....badly after everything we have been through! . i said i think its best if we break up and she said we should just have a small break but she didnt want me looking for other girls we had a small break for about 2 weeks. but before she we had a break she asked if she could borrow some money as she was broke and had no job, i said i would do my best to help her, but i was tight with money at the time and it dragged on for over a month till i could give her some money. I gave her all I had, which it was only $400, i was supposed to give her $2000 but the dept collecters had to take most of it! there was nothing i could do about it., I had to eat beans and bread for 2 weeks, but i did it because i loved her. Things after that were ok, she said she misses me and loves me so much and wants to be in my life!, i was so happy that i would have my love back again!. we talked on msn for about 2 weeks, all happy and constantly telling eachother we are so in love. then she went distant on me again, and i popped her the question!, do you want to be with me ? lets start planning our future!, she said she wants to be friends for now until she sorts our her life. again i was hurt, because one minute she says she loves me and wants to be with me but the next she is all distant again. I told her that im not going to wait around for her forever and im going to move on. I told her that im going to start seeing someone else because i need to get over you. she said I dont want to be only friends! i just want some time do sort my life out and then we can get back together.

 

Stupid me got sucked in again and agreed to have her back. again things were good, until she became distant again and would go for days without speaking to me. i told her i couldnt handle it anymore and we need to cut all ties. At this time i was a mess, i had just lost my grandmother, and a week prior to that i had just got out of hospital, i was very emotional to say the least. I felt alone, i needed someone to be there for me so i always used to call her up and cry like a baby telling her i love her so much, and she said she loves me too and we can try make things work. it was a never ending cycle. until the last time i spoke to her..

 

I hadnt spoken to her for 2 days, i missed her dearly so i called her. she was at a party so i understand if she couldnt talk but the way she answered the phone and spoke to me was unlike her. she answered and said " hi....whats up? "..I replied nothing is up i just wanted to say a quick hi! i havent spoken to you for a couple of days!, she then responded with " you know i cant talk on the phone , im at a party i cant talk now anyways. I said ok...well ill guess i'll speak to you later on then. she said ok bye.

 

she was very cold, very distant, only 2 days prior to that she was telling me how much she misses me and loves me. so i called her back to tell her i have some money for her ( it was my grandmothers money that she left me for her wil) and she was like ok thanks makes sure you send it in canadian dollars. I told her i missed her and all she could come back with is, "yea i know.." so i hung up.

 

2 hours later i got a call, my auntee just had a stroke and i rushed to the hospital. i was having a mental break down. i had just lost my grandmother, and now my auntee!, i couldnt handle it!. i was having an anxiety attack and i wanted to call her so she could calm me down and make me feel better. so i tried calling her and she didnt answer. i tried calling her for like 20 min and she switched her phone off. i tried calling 2 hours later and she finally answered. she answered the phone in a arrogant and cold manner. i told her my auntie just had a stroke and i needed to talk to you. she came back with " ohh hmm...you know i cant talk on here!. sigh im not in a good mood im so tired " not once did she ask how my auntie was or even try to calm me down. she then brought up the money and exact her exact words " Why did you call me up earlier and tell me about the money??, you keep telling me about this money and never do anything about it!, if you have the damn money just give it to me instead of talking about it!. i was in shock that she was talking to me like this, I lost it and told her that im doing everything i can to help you and she cut in and said i was being dramatic again just like my mother. i told her i was upset at how she spoke to me earlier and she came back with " I was at a party OK!....look what THE HELL DO YOU WANT FWITH ME! HUH? we are just friends! god!!".

 

that was the final draw for me, i told her that i regret falling in love with her and she had changed, some bad words were exchanged and i hung up. i was crying so hard and so upset and she didnt care in the slightest!...sigh im so hurt guys

 

now the question is, should i still give her the money? I did promise it to her but the way she talked to me and treated me Im starting to have doubts. I'm supposed to send her money this friday, but i dont think she deserves it

 

I'm so sorry for the wall of text but i have no one else to talk to about this. was i in the wrong with all this? I told her i didnt want to speak to her again...was that the best move?

 

thanks guys

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with Ms. Lex. She does not deserve any money nor contact from you. She doesn't care about you. It's time to worry about yourself and leave that pyscho alone. She did not even show any consideration for your hurt (for your family). Come on, do you really need us to answer this?? Well, since you are asking, DO NOT, I mean DO NOT give this chick your money. She is not trying to be friends, she is just trying to play you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm sorry about everything you're going through with your grandmother, aunt, and car accident. It sounds like to me when your girlfriend moved to Canada, she feel out of love. Unfortunately this happens a lot, especially with LDRs. I think you did the right thing by cutting all ties with her. Now you need to stick with it, and stop running to her everytime you go through something emotional. It sounds like now she is just using you because she knows how emotionally needy your are right now, and she's taking advantage of it. Find someone else to go to when you need someone else to talk to . Please do not give her the money, she's not your girlfriend anymore, and she's not really your friend either.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you so much for the replies

 

I wont give her any money. I dont know what i was thinking

 

I always thought i was in the wrong, that i was the one always dramatizing things. she always used to say that i caused this. but yiu guys are right, I wont speak to her again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...