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If you have ever left your partner for another and regretted it ....


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My ex left me for eight months. He eventually came back. I love him so we are back together. It's been a little over a year since we have been back together. It is a struggle but for me worth it.


Yeah, but even so, just a month ago you said:


My husband had a physical and emotional affair with a coworker. He divorced me and realized after almost a year later the mistake he made and that he wanted to have his life with me back. It is a year later and we are back together. I know what you mean when you have visuals. I don't think I will ever trust him like I once did. Sometimes I look at him and still feel rage.


I'd never take a cheater back-- certainly not one that would jump up and leave me and our child for some other skirt.

However, in your case, lovehurt3, considering that you do have a son together; if your S.O. is honestly proving dedicated to changing himself, and actively finding ways to improve your relationship; then it's commendable that you are trying to work through this. For the record, I'd recommend some couples counseling, and/or individual counseling for him, so that he can get to the root of-- and resolve-- the underlying issues that caused him to leave you in the first place.


It's going to be a hard road trying to regain the trust for him that you once felt, and only time will tell if he is worth traveling that road.

I really hope your guy turns out to be an exception to the rule, and that things works out happily for you and your family in the long run.

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I couldn't be with someone with that kind of history between us. I couldn't be with someone that I look at sometimes and feel rage. I couldn't let my son see me take back his cheating father, one day he will know what happened and I can't teach him what his father did was okay. But that's just me. I would leave a cheating partner quicker for my kids. I can't teach them that cheating is okay. I fear that if i stay with a cheater, so will my daughter. I can't be partly responsible for that. I can't teach my son that it is okay to cheat on his wife, because mommy took daddy back. But that is my opinion. Lots of people say that they want their children to grow up with both parents, so they take cheating and being disrespected for the kids. But the kids do what they see you do in most cases. Besides, apparenlty the cheating partner could care less if thier kids have both parents, or else they wouldn't risk losing the family by cheating. Just my opinion.

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I'm in total agreement with you on this one, smarternow.

I was hesitant to lay it all out like that when this isn't really even lovehurt's thread... not to mention she's already taken the guy back, so it seems a bit irrelevant.

Anyway, surely we can all agree that the less upheaval, the better for the kid.


They've got an incredible challenge to face, and it's not one that I'd have recommended, or chosen for myself.

But it's what they've already chosen. So, if they can truly sort it out, more power to them.


However, if the tension's palpable, and the parents fight, it's going to impact the kid in any case... at which point calling it quits for good is really the only sane option.


Like I said, I hope it works out for them now, but there should certainly be no allowances made for any other 'slip ups' of any sort from the guy.

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My answer was ab the topic. I appreciate your comments. No one knows the rage that is fleeting at no particular moment-not my son or my hub. A s time goes it is less & less. There are no fights just trying to put the past in the past. I love him, that is why I am with him. My son loves seeing his father nightly & being family. My son has seen that you can forgive someone & love someone even when they make a terrible mistake & hurt you.

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