Cometcrater Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 So, I've both flirted with certain people like nobody's business, and have been "just flirted" with. Until recently I never put much thought into it, but until recently, I've never fallen for a guy who was "harmlessly" flirting with me. So is there such thing as "just flirting"? No actual romantic feelings, even in your subconscious? Is flirting harmless? Because so far, in my experience, there is no such thing as harmless flirting. One of the people always falls for the other. Link to comment
skibbe Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 I agree with you. There is no such thing as harmless flirting. The way I see it, flirting will either spark attraction or do the opposite - thus it is never harmless. The subconscious mind will ALWAYS be affected by flirting - no matter what people tell you. Do you have any idea if the guy has the same feelings for you? Link to comment
Bad Wolf Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 Of course there's harmless flirting, I flirt with chicks all the time even if I'm not trying to get with them.. most of the time it doesn't lead to attraction on either sides and it's defiantly not put anyone off... It's just a bit of fun. Link to comment
huskiesfan Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 No, there isn't such a thing as just flirting with no attraction involved. You have to be able to have some feelings for the person, no matter how minor, in order to flirt with them, because there seems to be something that differentiates flirting from teasing or regular conversation. Link to comment
lost1607307474 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 There is such a thing as harmless flirting. People can act in a flirty way around each other because it's fun, makes us giggle and smile and feel good about ourselves, but it doesn't necessarily mean we're interested in any kind of relationship with the other person. I bet there are a lot of people who aren't going to agree with me but I do believe that there is such a thing is harmless flirting. Link to comment
Bad Wolf Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 No, there isn't such a thing as just flirting with no attraction involved. You have to be able to have some feelings for the person, no matter how minor, in order to flirt with them, because there seems to be something that differentiates flirting from teasing or regular conversation. I sometimes flirt with people online, people I've never met before. I don't have any feelings for them so it's just harmless flirting... A bit of fun. Link to comment
lost1607307474 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 I sometimes flirt with people online, people I've never met before. I don't have any feelings for them so it's just harmless flirting... A bit of fun. Exactly, me too. Life isn't all serious business. Link to comment
Bad Wolf Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 Exactly, me too. Life isn't all serious business. How you doin? *in joeys voice* Link to comment
Raistlin Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 I've been one to flirt shamelessly, but I don't believe it's all harmless. I know very well that I could be triggering or averting attraction in myself or the girl... but usually that's my goal anyhow. Link to comment
psychoanalytical Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 I should think so. We do it subconsciously all the time. Even a married man would chat up a girl for his own satisfaction. I wouldn't think it's a bad thing, we just want to feel good about ourselves. Plus it's good practice for when you meet the girl who u really want to go for. Don't think too much into it. You're a girl you're supposed to just enjoy the attention right? Though, given ur 15y/o, I suspect it's not that simple for u - teenagers test the boundaries in part because they do not know them. So what may be harmless flirting for adults may turn south pretty fast in ur situation if ur not careful, given the peers ur flirting with are most likely to be 15 y/o boys who are under the influence of unhealthy doses of testosterone. To be socially responsible, I would suggest u be careful who u flirt with until u r sure it won't cause the flirtee any psychological sequelae, eg. infatuation, butterflies, "Love", heart break, suffering, etc. Please be gentle. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 Is flirting harmless? Because so far, in my experience, there is no such thing as harmless flirting. One of the people always falls for the other. ehhht, wrong. JK. in your experience maybe, but that is not the case. flirting happens a lot more than you think and nobody falls for the other. Link to comment
Miss Firecracker Posted March 19, 2009 Share Posted March 19, 2009 So, I've both flirted with certain people like nobody's business, and have been "just flirted" with. Until recently I never put much thought into it, but until recently, I've never fallen for a guy who was "harmlessly" flirting with me. So is there such thing as "just flirting"? No actual romantic feelings, even in your subconscious? Is flirting harmless? Because so far, in my experience, there is no such thing as harmless flirting. One of the people always falls for the other. I think you already know the answer to your question. Really no need to ask anyone, is there? Link to comment
Cometcrater Posted March 20, 2009 Author Share Posted March 20, 2009 Ha, never woulda guessed so many people would have replied. Skibbe- He says I'm "Cool but i dont like u like" so ya. Link to comment
COtuner Posted March 20, 2009 Share Posted March 20, 2009 Where you get into trouble is flirting with someone who finds you attractive. It gives them that moment of hope. It's nothing you have any control over, and I definitely will never say "don't flirt because this could happen". It's part of the whole risk factor with looking for relationships and love. I'm in that boat now - a guy flirted a lot with me and now I'm in the midst of a terrible crush on him, but I'd always had some feelings towards him. It's complimentary and painful all at the same time! It was just harmless flirting on his part because he was in a good mood, and we were relaxed. Link to comment
rivercitystein Posted March 20, 2009 Share Posted March 20, 2009 What some call flirting, I just call part of my personality. I've been told that I'm a flirt and I guess I agree with that but my flirting has nothing to do with sex or wanting to get with someone. It's just me being me. I think it's friendly. Since I flirt with everyone, not just a certain person or two, I totally believe it is harmless. It's just casual flirting. Link to comment
lost1607307474 Posted March 20, 2009 Share Posted March 20, 2009 What some call flirting, I just call part of my personality. I've been told that I'm a flirt and I guess I agree with that but my flirting has nothing to do with sex or wanting to get with someone. It's just me being me. I think it's friendly. Since I flirt with everyone, not just a certain person or two, I totally believe it is harmless. It's just casual flirting. I agree. Having a 'flirty' personality has nothing to do with being interested in the other person or wanting to have sex with them. Link to comment
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