3 month mark LDR, fear break up with her soon

[burea1124]

Hello, I'm 20, she's 19. I'm in South Korea, She's in North Carolina, Chapel Hill. On 03/27/09, it will be our 3 months being away from each other. We had gone out for about 2 months before we began this LDR thing. We both admitted that this wasn't quite love but the closest we ever felt to it.

 

Here's some of the reasons why I think her interest level is dropping.

 

- Rarely says thank you or I miss you anymore. No more pet names like sweet-heart.

- No longer engages in the shared journal we exchange together although I tried initiating it constantly

- When we chat online, all she seems to say is "yeah" "meh" and "huh?"

- It has been a week since she bailed out on all skype conversations.

- when I try to call her cell phone, it's voice mail.

 

Here's some of the things I think I contributed. I admit I'm a total idiot and will never do these again if I knew the laws of attraction when it comes to women.

 

-I sent her a 4 page email talking about my insecurities about how she doesn't put her facebook status on the front page, how I feel using pet names too much make me clingy, and that I fear writing long emails because it makes me look clingy

-I gave her a $70 chocolate for v-day, and then sent non-expensive gifts for her birthday/white day, draw cute pictures and send them to her.

-we had little arguments lately. One was because she kept coming late to Skype.

 

This is what she said after declining skype conversation schedule on google.

 

"cramming for exams .. >_

 

I just sent her a little message that said "good luck on exams, smart girl" But after feeling a little bit frustrated about all this, I've just canceled all the scheduled skype conversations for this week and am thinking about just not contacting her until she schedules them.

 

I schedule the skype conversations Monday-Friday but what is that? I'm supposed to wait around for her whenever she feels like doing it, and I don't get a say in when we get to meet and talk together? Let's talk tomorrow night, oh sorry, let's talk next week, oh no exams, too bad .. Yeah, she did have a nanny job last week and is having exam week this week but how hard is it to send me a quick reply to a text or say thank you for little gifts and drawings?

 

I read up on online articles about keeping your girlfriend's attraction level and realize I've been doing everything wrong. Yes I do say things like "you have good karma coz you met me" tease her and compliment her sparingly but I apologize too much, have told her she is the best girl I've ever dated, and just ... I'm confused about what to do.

 

My heart tells me to just stay cool and just let everything work itself out but ... god, it's so hard when it's a LDR and all you can do when you do stuff to mess up the attraction level is basically nothing.

 

perhaps it's just good to ask her flat out next time we talk on skype, "Hey, in complete honesty, have you lost feelings for me because I will just let you go"

 

I'm rambling a lot. Obviously, I'm very confused. I will probably calm down when I wake up tomorrow. But I will appreciate a lot if somebody generous can decipher what I've just told you and can give me some words of advice

[Casey13]

definitely seems like shes losing interest but whether your RS will fail or make it will very much depend on you. Stop being her door mat all the time and let her chase you for once. If she stops contacting you all together then you know its time to move on. By being clingy as you call it you are only making her pull away more. Hope things work out tho