Need Advice: Should I give her a 2nd chance?

[beachhbum]

Ok so heres the deal

 

A friend of mine says she wants to set me up with this girl. she goes on about how perfect she is and all that. so i said what the hell, ask her if shes interested and have her give me her number

 

so i get the girls number

 

I call her on thursday to see if she wants to grab a bite to eat on saturday. she says she wants to but works as a bartender sat nights, and asks me if we can go on sunday instead. i said ok, see u at such and such a place at 9:30. then said goodbye

 

So sunday night rolls around and I go to the restaurant to meet her. i wait 5 minutes, and call her to see where she is..cuz this is a blind date after all i dont know what she looks like.

 

She picks up the phone and says "whos this?" that was my first red flag...then "omg im soo sorry" she must have apologized 100 times in 30 seconds. she gave me this story about how she forgot to save my number, and she had to pick up her sister from the airport or something. and then she said i never called her to confirm and she forgot.

 

Now this part caught me completley off guard:

 

She asks if we can meet up tomorow night instead. i said no because i have class, and she asks until when, and i said late, and she asked what time, and i said 9.

 

I did not want to talk to her anymore as i was upset (im pretty sure she cud tell that too..so i told her id call her next week, which i dunno if that was a smart move)

 

Now i have been blown off by a girl once before and the way she acted completely caught me off guard..she seemed to feel bad, or it cud have been an act..i dont know.

 

I would think if she wasnt interested, she wud have been vague and said lets hang out sometime..

 

Now my gut tells me to just forget about her..but..my female friends said if i called her to confirm this wudnt have happened. i dont usually call to confirm a date..and i dont see how this cud be my fault.

 

Now since i said id call her next week im not expecting her to call me, even though she probably should if shes sincere.

 

shud i call her again and give her another chance?

 

Sorry for the long post

[Keyman]

Quick answer... Hell yes.

Long answer... Oh hell yes.

 

Okay, so she forgot and had something else to do that night. Double bookings are a bit of an issue and logically, the one they remember is the one most important...."pick up sis from airport" would be the one on my mind.

 

She profusely apologised and tried to make another time, kinda tells me that she is actually sorry, messed up and would like the opportunity to make up for it. Seems sincere to me. As you said, if she really didn't care, she wouldn't be doing that.

 

While you are not a fault at all here... I would suggest that a good course of action would be to confirm the date the day before as suggested. Although, she should not have used this as an excuse.

 

Don't let one mix up cause you to avoid her, as you never know, she might turn out to be your next long term.

[Seymore]

You shouldn't have had to call and confirm. If she was interested enough, she would have saved your number and not blown you off. I'd wait for her to call YOU.

 

Not saying she should have ditched her sister, but she just doesn't seem like it matters to her. Just my opinion. What really gets me is that SHE was the one who said "That doesn't work, how about Sunday?" She suggested the plan for Sunday and didn't stick to it.

 

I mean, don't hold it over her head, but I would just see if she calls you.

[top bloke]

Give her a call ..people make mistakes.If she does it again then cut her out.

[FloatingAnchor]

If it were me, I would not give her a second chance. She should have written it down or somehow made a note of it at the time the date was made. This slip up, while probably innocent, makes me think she is scatterbrained or didn't value the date very much, neither of which is appealing to me.

[appleguy]

Yeh, I agree double bookings happen too frequently to be overly offended.

 

Now you guys have a perfect topic for breaking the ice with!

[Tsila]

Well...for what you wrote ...I say TRUST YOUR GUT ... it is always right on. I wish I would have trusted my gut but I wanted to know if I give another chance or if I try a bit harder it may be different. Well it wasn't...and after 2 years of trying and understanding and working on myself, I ended up hurt and not because he hurt me but because I let myself down.

 

If you haven't met this girl yet maybe it is worth your while to give her another chance. (So that you know... ) If she is interested she will come and meet you. If she needs a 'reminder call' forget it. What are you a bell boy at a hotel? And what if you and her goes out...will she need a reminder every time you two make a date?

That's a total bs and I never heard of anything like that. Your female friends are a bit off the wall on this.

Set up another meeting with her...if she comes great...if not move on and find someone who respects you enough to meet you blind date or not.

And...if you already built up some resentment over the first situation...that's a bad start already.

[Stereohead]

Honestly. I would say no. If she was truly sorry she could have texted or called you earlier before changing plans… if she really wanted to go on that date…she would have said something before letting the time come closer… I’ve never had to “confirm” a date with anyone…I trusted them on their world when it was made.

 

Of course my current boyfriend… I do have to ask him if we’re still hanging out…cause he’ll cancel when it draws closer to that hour we were going to… and I don’t like the feeling when I looked forward to it all day to get a “rain check”.

 

But the first date is more important then the following. It’s your first impression. Her first impression to you is basically letting you know that she couldn’t even remember to go on the date (granted it was a blind one but still)…she didn’t tell you she’d be running late or changed her plans. So basically, you were easily forgotten.

 

I’d just look the other direction and find someone else to date. If she calls, I’d tell her your busy or found somebody else… Unless you really feel like you want to give her a second chance…

[beachhbum]

thanks all

 

im giving her one more shot

 

ill post and let you know what happens

[beachhbum]

she flaked again (this time at the call to confirm, i wasnt dumb enough to just show up at the restaurant again)

 

her friends mom just happened to be in the hospital tonite after we already had plans..and she just couldnt leave her...

 

right..........

 

as i post this i am throwing her number in the trash

 

 

[angellight]

What a bi##tch. Thank god you called to confirm this time....She is not worth the paper her number was written on...