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lizzzy111
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You
All I Ever Wanted Was to Love You

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Hey All

So 10 days ago i ended it with a guy who i have been on and off with for 2 years. I always felt as though he wasnt ever fully in it, at least not like I was. He was on and off and almost bipolar in the fact that he would love me and be alll about me and then literally a day later seem uninterested and make comments causing me to become jealous, when im not a jealous person. He knew how to push my buttons and he not only pushed mine but other peoples as well. He was always trying to get a rise out of me and others...Ive never seen anything like it.

I tryed over and over again to make it work because everytime i would run away he would come crawling back calling me and writing emails saying that he misses me and that its not like what i thought it was and that i was just overreaccting. I would go back and it would be great for a month and then go back to how it was when he just takes advantage of my love for him and willingness to give.

He was always in and out and he decided to move accross the country but he still insisted we talk everyday because who knows what can happen and he didnt want to lose me. he never wanted to lose me. so i went on like that dating other people yet still speaking to him everyday (on his terms mind you). i finally had enough one day when he didnt text me back or call me back and i ended it with him suddenly and over a text.

After that he was very angry and sent me a mean mean email the next day saying he will do as i say and delete me out of his life and that his impression sucks because i should have called him and what not. he told me then to have a nice life..

I am now having regrets that i wished i would have not texted him however i had tryed to tell him over and over how i felt and its like he never listened and i just wanted that feeling of abandonment to go away. i needed it to be over.

I wrote him back and email saying that i have too many strong feelings and that i needed to do this for myself and the reason why i cant be causual with him is because i do have all these feelings and i need to allow myself to move on. my email was honest and sincere and i even apolgized about ending it with a text. He never wrote me back

 

Now its been 10 days and no word from him at all. I know this is what i asked for but its like so hard to know that this time he is actually not contacting me when time and time before he would neevr let me go. But i am so sad that the last words from him were so cruel and cunning and its like he doesnt even care. I cant get the closure i need for some reason even though i know i needed to get out of this addictive relationship i still feel so confused about how and why he hasnt contacted me at all. it makes me sad to know he doesnt care im out of his life and he made no effort to change my mind.

 

Any words from yall i would love to hear what you think

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