need a little help.

[giggidy]

This is primarily just to vent. thank you so much for reading, and any insight would be great.

 

I've been in NC for a month, i realize that she's a different person now and that all i need is time alone to heal. i also realize that I never want to talk to her or see her face again. under any circumstances.

 

but...

 

She's all i can think about.

 

I wake up: i think about her. I go to bed and i think about her. and even when i'm not thinking about her, there's this constant twinge of anger and betrayal.

 

i drive in my car: i think about her and her new boyfriend. either how they must work better than we did, or they must work worse then we did. how she's happy to have a new boyfriend, even though during the time we were back together she refused to call it official because she didn't like the term "in a realtionship." that was such a * * * * ing shallow, selfish lie.

 

I don't know why i feel this way. i have a lot of good qualities:

 

I'm at a major university in my junior year and i hold a 3.6 GPA

I'm sweet and caring, and i love to help people.

I'm creative, an artist and an excellent writer.

I've got an intellect for theory. Anything structural or post-structural (Foucault, Marx, Machiavelli)

I'm attractive and have a great body.

I'm a cerebral person, i'm in my head a lot, and i'm always willing to work through my own problems.

I'm articulate and communicative.

I'm not fake.

 

But i can't seem to shake this * * * * .

 

no one seems to be attracted towards me or my good qualities. I'm at a separate campus from the main university, and everyone here seems to be so unfriendly.

 

I'm just really depressed and i guess i'm just having a hard time. when i was with her i felt like the most attractive and intelligent person in the world. now i feel like dirt, even when i look at those qualities. she knew all of that, but she still dumped me. If i was a chick, i would have realized how rare of a guy i am. but no. she's with this five-foot-five goober with frosted hair that plans out his every wardrobe. he's fake and shallow and just cares about attraction. and I can't believe she'd chose that over someone real.

[sandrawg]

It's only been a month. Obsessively focusing on your ex is natural, and part of the healing process. Just give it time.

[peace_lily]

I don't know why i feel this way. i have a lot of good qualities:

 

I'm at a major university in my junior year and i hold a 3.6 GPA

I'm sweet and caring, and i love to help people.

I'm creative, an artist and an excellent writer.

I've got an intellect for theory. Anything structural or post-structural (Foucault, Marx, Machiavelli)

I'm attractive and have a great body.

I'm a cerebral person, i'm in my head a lot, and i'm always willing to work through my own problems.

I'm articulate and communicative.

I'm not fake.

 

no one seems to be attracted towards me or my good qualities.

 

"this five-foot-five goober with frosted hair that plans out his every wardrobe."

 

Just so you know, I'd be thrilled if I met some one with this list of good qualities. Seriously Thrilled. I wish I could find someone like this.

 

And your description of him is just hilarious. Only adds to the whole attractiveness quotient.

 

I know I'm not the only one attracted to these things; there's gotta be someone out there for you.

 

Sorry you're having a bad day....hope it gets better soon.

[airmanswife]

well I can't speak for her, but usually when a girl drops a really good guy flat like that it's because she wants to do her own thing without answering to anyone. She may end up wanting you to be her 'backburner boyfriend'. She may want to come back to you after she's done having her fun.

 

But the main topic right now is you. Thinking about her and wondering about her isn't necessarily bad. Right now, a month out, it's still a habit. You haven't gotten yourself out of the habit of thinking about her, worrying about her, wishing you were with her. It will go away. I heard somewhere that it takes half the time you were with someone to get over them. I don't know if that's true or not. But don't freak out just yet. You know she's no good for you, that's the biggest, hardest step in a break up.

 

Good luck.

[stickman]

You are on target and on the right path my friend. You are getting mad now! Seriously.

 

Take that energy to the next level when you are ready and the world is YOURS! Soon enough you will look back at this chic and her "GOOBER" and laugh.